Bit: Biography--the clonus horror Credits
Episode: 811- parts: the clonus horror
[In the theater]
(Mike and the Bots are reading the
credits, in the style and voice of Peter Graves as host of
Biography.)
Mike: Executive producer Walter Fiveson was a good
friend of supervising executive producer Ray Dryden; they
grew up together in a log cabin with a woman involved in
casting, Susan Arnold.
Crow: But all was
not as it seemed. The arrival of associate producer Peter
"R.J." Deyell proved both groundbreaking and heartwrenching
for the young Liverpudlians.
Mike: And then
Co-producer Michael Lee and Carolyn Habel and Michael Lee
and Paul Berkowitz and Joe Giannone and Robert Cummings and
Michael Lacoe and some other guys and Harvey Pence...
Tom: I'll take
it, Mike. The oddly-named Timaree McCormick, young and
brilliant production assistant, developed an unhealthy
fixation on Joe Blasco founder of the Joe Blasco Makeup
School.
Crow: I'll take
it now. Dwight LaVers, a name known to millions, yet a dark
mystery to even his closest friends.
Mike: Tomorrow
the fascinating world of M.A "Ma" Schreibman, who conquered
his blindness to become one of the most sought-after visual
consultants in the business.
Tom: The film
stylings of Brogan de...Paul Sharp and Ted Keep, two crisply
named young men, tonight on "Biography".
Crow: Freeze
Frame: The J. Geils Band. Synonyms in the hearts of
Americans everywhere.
Mike: Peter
Graves. The underrated, underpaid incredibly handsome host
of "Biography," tonight on "Biography."
Crow: Tonight on
"Biography," Paulette Breen, who turned down perfectly
innocent sexual advances from Peter Graves on the set of the
movie Clonus, who will never work in this town again.
Tom: James
Mantell, in a striking coincidence, shared a first name with
the hulking expressionless pseudo-cowboy James Arness. James
Arness. As a young boy, James Arness nurtured a howling
bitterness in the face of the awesomely superior talent of
his brother, Peter Graves.
Peter Graves' life and career were marked by a generosity of
spirit and loving attitude towards his fellow man, which
were altogether missing in the pitted soul of James Arness.
Often, James Arness' mother would remark to friends that she
loved her son Peter Graves so very, very much; while she
hated James Arness and cursed the day her womb had been
blighted with such a creature. "James Arness: Ugly and
Stupid"...tonight on "Biography."
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