Movie: (1970) Cornjob and family are rooting for him as Gamera faces off against monster Jiger, who is threatening Expo ’70 (which was an actual thing).
Host: Jonah.
Opening: In the cold open, Pearl expresses her pleasure with Kinga’s progress but suggests a bit of vacation in the Time Bag.
After the show open: J&tB are navigating a “choose your adventure” murder mystery.
Invention exchange: J&TB present the Telegraph, which tells you if anyone is lying to you about watching your favorite TV show. The Mads have invented the Plasmanator, which converts anything into delicious plasma.
Segment 1: J&tB present Expo Expo exhibits.
Segment 2: Crow is now a student at the Tom Servo school for roaming national accents for children. After intermission, final exams.
Segment 3: J&tB get a visit from Dr. Donna St. Phibes.
Close: J&tB sing Jiger’s Irish funeral song; Max is mourning.
Stinger: Susan lashes out.
Thoughts:
• This episode premiered on July 22, 2022.
• Kinga does a bit of Clayton-esque 4th-wall breaking during the cold opening.
• This week’s LOTR reference: “Light the beacons!”
• I laughed a bit. This one was moderately funny, with the excellent Irish funeral song a highlight.
• Fave riff: “All according to plan!”
• Honorable mentions: “We go now to the exposition for some exposition about the exposition.” “Second opinion from Dr. Jim Beam.” “Well, your move, Charles Darwin.” “I stink?” “Shut up, Wesley.”
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I have blurred 3-yo. memories of Montreal ’67, so when I had a 1986 meeting in Vancouver, I took a few days to see the Expo.
As for Jonah&tB’s Expo Expo commentary on the great pre-Epcot glory days of World’s Fairs, I must confess…they’re not wrong. But dang, those things were still cool. :)
(Yes, I’m that old. I’m old enough to remember when you didn’t have to lie about watching a trend-binging stream show, because everyone was watching the same broadcast show on the same night.)
And yes, every reader of Choose Your Own Adventure never knew what the “true” plot was supposed to be–without cheating and flipping through the book at random–since the choices led to A) Instant one-page death, B) Whatever the “real” plot was supposed to be, and most often C), the lame anti-climax plot that ended with “Don’t worry, we’ll get them NEXT time!”
You may notice I have fewer comments about the movie than Sampo does. There’s a reason for that.
Apparently, not every Gamera movie is Producer Joel’s ideal excuse for Jonah to sing the Turtle Meat Song.
Gamera vs Jiger fails the Bechdel Test. None of the female characters converse with one another.
When this movie was licensed for use on MST3K, it came with the stipulation that it must be shown uncut. On a streaming platform, this isn’t the issue it would be if it was on a network and have to work within a specified time slot. However, I suspect there was a more nefarious purpose.
I speak of this one brief scene where they watch a film clip of an elephant that had larvae hatch in its trunk and was being treated for it. It is intensely gross. The MST3K vs Gamera Round 2 fan production must have cut it, because I don’t remember seeing it there. Possibly the rights holders were thinking, “We had to suffer through watching this Back in the Day, so you gaijin punks have to as well.”
The kaiju battles are fun, with lots of weird cartoony physics. However, the kids are getting shriller in a way that presages much of the unpleasantness of Gamera vs Zigra.
Though I must say that I appreciate how Jonah and the Bots restricted themselves to one crack about Cornjob’s unfortunate facial hair.
The Expo Expo host segment is horribly underwhelming and just drags. Things improve considerably with Tom Servo’s school for learning how to speak with an indeterminate wandering accent like Susan in the movie. And it all concludes with an Irish wake for Jiger and a rousing memorial song.
Favorite riffs
There’s no better playground for a child’s imagination than a dilapidated construction site.
“Forgive me. My car got caught in traffic.”
Stupid Waze, am I right?
We go now to the Exposition for some exposition about the Exposition.
Okay, if anybody asks, you ate some Tide Pods and I had to take you to the hospital and that’s where I’ve been, okay?
“What are these strange sculptures found on tiny islands in the Pacific?”
And why are they of Marlon Brando?
I remember the opening credits of M*A*S*H differently.
Edward James Olmos as Hunter S. Thompson.
You see, the negative space in this shot is meant to symbolize the emotional distance between Gamera and the people trying to kill Gamera.
“Tell me all that happened. Did anything strange go on during this?”
As your counsel, I advise you not to answer.
Imagine telling your parents you got an acting gig, and it turns out you’re just playing the part of Jiger’s butt.
A steam-powered dinosaur? I never thought I’d live to see the day.
I could never get those whimsical nutcrackers to work.
You know what would be cool? A Gamera themed combination smoker and barbecue grill. The shell acts as a way to smoke meats. But when you want that extra char, you just stick it in front of his mouth.
“That’s the Nankai-Maru.”
It was an impossible test, but Kirk cheated.
Welcome back to The Westminster Kaiju Show. The Pembroke Jiger needs to leap over the boat and summersault. Let’s see if he can. Oh, the judges are not going to like that.
“Turn on the TV set!”
Let’s see if we’re screaming on the news!
“Doesn’t Gamera know it’s here?”
Let’s ask Alexa. Alexa?
Gamera flies like a plane/He likes pleasure mixed with pain/Never kink shame Gamera!
You’re listening to KEWX Radio. We’ve got Jiger on the studio right now and… Oh Gawd, we’re gonna die! Anyway, here’s Lynyrd Skynyrd with “Free Bird”.
I’m glad the spirit of the Keystone Kops is alive and well in Japanese cinema.
“Sir, Dr. Williams is calling for help!”
I left him for dead in the Congo! I mean, what?
“On the mountain. It’s all right, I know nobody’s there.”
Well, except for that apartment complex, I guess.
“You must try to get Gamera here.”
Shut up, Wesley.
A young Steve Jobs steals another prototype.
Wait! Cornjob didn’t finish sealing the windows!
This is the most stressful game of Operation ever played.
“What about your air?”
I don’t care. Tommy beefed in here.
Fun fact: To achieve this effect, they filled a Jiger suit with a bunch of angry bees. And when that wasn’t enough, they threw in a rabid raccoon. And when that didn’t work, they just got a whole new actor to play the part. Mainly because this actor was threatening to sue the production.
For sale. Baby Jiger costume. Worn once.
“If you can build your sound system right away…”
The school dance is saved!
Is our relentless shouting helping, Gamera?
I’m so confused. Was Expo a giant money laundering scheme for these people.
Is there a bomb on the bus somewhere that will explode if they end the movie in a reasonable amount of time?
Personally, I think long suffering deaths are fun in kids’ movies.
For a review of this “MST3K” episode and others go to “Faith’s Take” on YouTube.com.
She reviews Rifftrax as well.
Does anyone know if these will ever be available on DVD?
A Season 13 box set (in your choice of DVD/Blu-Ray) was offered as a Kickstarter reward at the $250+ pledge level, but there’s no word as if it’ll be available for general purchase.
Also, none of the physical rewards (outside of the 3D glasses) have gone out yet, 2 years after the Kickstarter launched. They’re coming, as Alternaversal has acknowledged numerous delays regarding production and fulfillment, but geez.
Magnificent. This feels like a lost episode from season 3. Great riffing and a wonderfully goofy movie. The Gamera films are possibly perfect MST fodder. They have that strange quality of appearing to have been made not just for children, but by children. The surreal Kaiju fights, the bizarre dubbing and ridiculous voices, the pre-schoolers being the only ones who know what’s going on. It would have been fun to watch the movie by itself.
Always nice to see Cornjob, though that mustache is not a good look on anyone, especially a Japanese man.
A big reason Shout Factory acquired MST3K is they were running out of classic episodes to put out on DVD and wanted to be able to produce more. So yes, they’ll be available to the general public at some point.
These guards are purely ornamental.
Maybe I’m just tired after a long day at work, but I don’t feel like I was in the right frame of mind to enjoy this one tonight. The Gamera movies aren’t really among my ‘go-to’ episodes and while I did laugh in spots I found myself getting preoccupied with figuring out where I’ve heard the voice of the kid voicing Tommy (I swear the teenage girl was Trixie from ‘Speed Racer’). That being said, the Irish funeral skit and song came out of nowhere and left me with a big goofy grin on my face so it’s all good. Maybe I’ll get more out of it next time.
Fave riffs
‘The themes of the Expo are peace and world harmony.’
And War!
‘It’s purpose remains a mystery…’
Like the ‘Cats’ movie.
‘I will just have to make a model of the statue.’
You could’ve done that this whole time??!!
Just toooo loooooooooong!
I’m not a big fan of the Gamera movies anyway so this felt like a slog through quicksand in a oatmeal factory.
I’m going to try drinking a bathtub of coffee and rewatch in 30, 15 or 3 minute increments. Maybe that’ll help? I should be done in a about a metric month.
I love Kaiju movies. And I love MST3K’s Gamera episodes. I was so excited when they announced this one, and it did not disappoint. Front to back, just a great episode. The Tom Servo school for roaming national accents for children was absolutely inspired. And of course, another great musical number.
Am I the only surprised that this wasn’t one of Joel’s two episodes? After all he, not Jonah has all the history with this turtle. As far as that goes Josh has that KTMA history with Gamera as well.
It was really strange seeing Gamera without Sandy Frank’s fingerprints. So this time we get an unedited movie. We were warned that it would be slow in parts but that it was show it unedited or not get the movie at all. We even get the Japanese credits and title cards. (Although I noticed the ship’s throttle was labelled in English.) Was it worth it? You bet.
Cold Open: Taking this in vacuum, I really wasn’t sure where they would go with this storyline.
Opening Segment: I always loved Choose Your Own Adventure books as kid. I thought there could be funny in this, but the segment fell pretty flat.
Invention Exchange:
Jonah and the Bots have a winner with the Telegraph. Personally, I think one should be installed by every workplace water cooler. Or I guess since this is the post pandemic world its functionality should be built into MS Teams and Zoom. That way you know if you can take your coworker’s television hot takes seriously or not.
I think the Plasminator has promise as well. Though there may still be a bug to work out.
Host Segment 1: Speaking of this should have been a Joel episode, this segment had a very Joel in season 2 or 3 vibe to it. It kind of reminded me of the Old School host segment from #206 Ring of Terror. I especially liked the Pavilion Hall of Hall Pavilions.
Host Segment 2: I like the concept of this bad accent class but for some reason I didn’t find it as funny as I thought I would.
Host Segment 3: I’m really not sure what we just learned here. The Bots have bones but Jonah has gears for internals. Yet they stop short of saying the Bots are animals but Jonah is a robot. Then Dr. St. Phibes is eaten. It all seems kind of random.
Closing Host Segment: The song tribute to Jiger was solid if unspectacular
It’s a Gamera movie aimed at children all right. Not the worst thing ever. I do have one question: what was the deal with that hammer and sickle Gamera flies by right after he is revived? That came out of nowhere. It reminded me of the Hitler building #819 Invasion of the Neptune Men. There was some weird stuff going on in Japan for 10 years or so. Otherwise it was silly and the source of very workmanlike if unspectacular riffing. Frankly, I didn’t find the fact they had to riff the entire unedited movie detracted in anyway. There were no real lulls. Overall I rate this one good not great.
Favorite Riffs:
First appearance of Dr. Williams who is wearing Safari type gear: Crow “Lovely day for some light colonialism.”
Gamera flies by the jet helicopters lifting the statue: Jonah “Photobomb!”
Gamera is crying out. Crow “What is boy? Is Barugon stuck in a well?”
Gamera does a spin flyby. Crow “Whoa. It’s a flying Roomba.” Later on Jonah “Gamera is like the original fidget spinner.
During the first Gamera/Jiger drawn out fight: Jonah “Well, imagine how cool it will be once they edit it down for the final movie.”
A discussion about the Jiger menace. Panel Member “Even our bullets can’t stop him.” Tom “No matter how hard we throw them.”
The baby Jiger emerges. Tom “I’m the baby. Gotta love me. Not the momma!”
An establishing shot of an electrical substation. Jonah “Hey you guys!”
Gamera is swimming submerged. Jonah “Wanna feel old? That’s the baby from Nevermind.”
Here are the lyrics for Sing a Song for Jiger.
https://mst3k.fandom.com/wiki/Sing_a_Song_for_Jiger
For those who didn’t get a Gizmoplex Pass, there was a feature where every month subscribers were given access to six episodes with a common theme. To encourage folks to check them out, they would include a wrap show called Synthia’s Selects (though in later months, Pearl and Mega-Synthia would guest host). In it, Synthia would discuss the featured movie with (usually) one of the SoL crew, typically focusing on something inane. One of the more interesting ones was when Mega-Synthia believed that The Girl in Lovers Lane was a romcom based on how she thinks pool hall fights are a component of a perfect date. In the closing segment, she was rather perturbed by how bleak it proved to be.
Anyway, during Mega Monster Month, there was a bonus feature where Dr. Donna St. Phibes would talk about the movie’s monster and its ecology. For instance, did you know that, in spite of its simian appearance, the Common Desert Eegah is most genetically similar to the giraffe? Oh, it’s true!
Also, that they bought disk rights to MST3K: the Series, and if Joel claims this is S13, and not some new separate revival series like Netflix claimed it was, that’s how they can put the episodes on their Shout Channel. And, presumably, have the disk rights.
And why they don’t seem to have the rights to stream Netflix’s S11-12.
Dan in WI, no you aren’t the only one who wondered why Joel and Josh, replete with his Mighty Voice, didn’t guest riff this movie considering the history they both have with the titular turtle going all the way back to KTMA.
The selection of films/hosts this season were done by lottery, in order to keep things level. Jonah mentioned how happy he was to have gotten the Halloween episode during the Q&A stream.
A handful of MSTies noticed it was six episodes for Jonah, four for Emily, and two for Joel.
From what I’ve read elsewhere, the new theme song is divisive.
I also found the third host segment strange. It seemed like a surreal one off. I doubt the whole bone thing will come up again. I hope Dr. St. Phibes is OK. The giant brain was more than a little out of left field.
Is this the just plain oddest Gamera movie, or what? Yes, most of the others are shining examples of normality, but this just seems even weirder, especially the mini-Jiger sequence. In addition, the adults seem even dimmer than usual compared to the annoying kids. And speaking of annoying, Susan (of the unplaceable accent) gives Kenny a run for his money as the mort irritating Gamera kid. Then, there’s the violence, the overt shilling for the Expo, and the loads of padding. At least I took my own advice and didn’t watch the elephant scene.
Still, this turned out to be a good episode. The riffing was great, they came up with new lyrics for the Gamera theme, and they did another great new song. I agree that the Expo host segment has a very Joel-style feeling, including Jonah’s performance. And I thought they did a good job dealing with the overlong sequences, particularly the staggering Gamera bit.
By the way, do the Comet versions include the commercials they did for the Gizmoplex versions? Regarding those, I’m not into role-playing games, I still have no idea who/what Bendy is, and Bear Manor Media seems to have a pretty interesting selection.