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A New Riff from Bridget and Mary Jo10 Replies to “A New Riff from Bridget and Mary Jo”Commenting at Satellite News
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So…
Any given day on any given American soap opera. Or so I’m told. Mary Jo and Bridget have lots of low hanging fruit here. DALLAS jokes. GOLDEN GIRLS jokes. Will it be required for women to wear a “It’s Wine O’Clock” shirt to watch this?
And, of course, anything with “Bride” in the title, so that women can feel vindicated in watching a bride end up in comic misadventures, unless she’s a Runaway Bride like Julia Roberts.
So, um, is this one of those things Hallmark shows the other ten months of the year? I don’t have any clothing that celebrates guzzling alcohol or scarfing ice cream.
Do you have any clothing that celebrates misogyny?
Sadly no–If I had any “Get in the Kitchen, and Make Me Some Gourmet Artisan Cupcakes!” t-shirts, I could probably wear one, but, well, there ya go.
Eric J.:
Whatever you wear, you’re a Rifftrax hating buffoon.
There, I’ve now watched all three of these Rue McClanahan Bride movies. This is the first in the series, and definitely the least of the three, which is saying something. It was not helped by having Patrick Duffy make a “special” appearance, though now I DO appreciate Ted Shakleford’s performance in the other movies by comparison. These movies are so ridiculous, over-the-top pseudo-meaningful that they become parodies of themselves; in other words, lots of fun to watch. The proposal scene in this one takes place at a zoo, and apparently a boring chldren’s petting zoo at that, in the opening scene, and it just goes downhill from there, with bad behavior from the kids, a bar fight in a nice dinner club, a pregnant nun, an abusive ex-spouse, etc etc etc. Ridiculous, and perfect to enjoy with the MJ/Bridget riffing. I liked this one a little less than Mother of the Bride, which has a glorious funeral scene (as all good wedding movies do), but I still found the riffing worthwhile. I don’t recall too many Dallas/Golden Girls references, however; hope that doesn’t ruin anyone’s expectations.
And, sorry, I don’t have any clothing that celebrates guzzling alcohol or scarfing ice cream either. Does that mean I don’t fit the Women Watching Stupid Movies Geared Toward a Certain Demographic and therefore should not be allowed to watch? Or does it mean that since, regardless of gender, I did watch the riffed movie that I get to comment on it now?
Either way, I shall now wonder why I didn’t get to hear the braying of mating hippos while being proposed to. So sad for me!
For what it’s worth the comment was about the current fad of women’s clothing glorifying alcohol consumption. I suppose those garments will eventually join the t-shirts decorated with seventies cannabis art in the giant, global, clothing-nobody-wants-anymore dump in the Atacama Desert of South America. Ha!
I hope MJ & Bridget pummeled this one but good, because I’ve seen it un-riffed, and I want it hurt. I want it hurt bad. And therein lies a tale…
Certainly Northeast Ohioans and Detroit denizens of a certain age will recall legendary horror movie host The Ghoul, played by one Ron Sweed (R.I.P. *sniff*). Wacky maniacal nonsense, stuff blown up with firecrackers, cheesy old horror & sci-fi movies with appropriate sound-effects dropped in to ’em, etc. etc. etc. It was a lot of fun, trust me – and in some ways, even a little proto-MST3K-ish.
Anyway, The Ghoul was on and off the air throughout the 1970s and 1980s, but his last regular gig was a 1998-2003 run here in Ohio (sadly, Detroit got just a few one-off specials during that time), and for the first 2 years of that run, it was classic Friday night Ghoul Power, with all the beloved shtick fans craved. Well, in the fall of 2000, the powers-that-be at his station decided it would be a dandy idea to move him to Sunday nights (technically, Monday mornings) at 12 AM. This was a less-than-ideal time slot
for obvious reasons. (Gee, television station management fixing what ain’t broke; where have we seen THAT before?) Still, the more-egregious example of needless tampering came in the form of the movies run. Occasionally a flick more typical of the show would play, but by and large, The Ghoul was at the mercy of the station’s movie packages – a random assortment of movies, often no sound effects, and sometimes The Ghoul host segments would be cut back to almost nil, to boot. Boffo socko? Nope!
And that’s how I first saw CHILDREN OF THE BRIDE. Handcuffed by movie packages or not, this was still what we like to call “a slap in the face.” Now truth be told, I’m not really salty because it wasn’t a typical Ghoul Power flick (on the contrary; I was introduced to plenty of less-than-obvious films on the show, genre-appropriate or otherwise, that I wound up greatly enjoying), though a 1990 made-for-TV comedy/drama on the program WAS a tough pill to swallow. But, the bigger problem was just how joyless and unpleasant the entire flick is, mainly because everyone is just so, so unlikable. Kristy McNichol as a pregnant ex-nun? That’s the kind of thing that will have you yearning for the warm, familiar arms of EMPTY NEST. Oh, and a son who very clearly has a compulsive sexual addiction, an addiction that nearly gets him caught in a moment of adultery which would have had dire, violent consequences for him, yet no one seems too concerned about any of it. Hilarious? Not really! Like I said, it’s all just unpleasant. Even Patrick “some might say he’s a national treasure” Duffy doesn’t really seem like he wanted to be there. Add in Rue McClanahan, who I don’t much care for even on a good day, and, well, it’s just a film that can’t be torn apart enough for my tastes. I despise CHILDREN OF THE BRIDE.
So thanks, Bridget and Mary Jo! Tackling a movie that truly deserves some riffin’, and unknowingly avenging The Ghoul while you’re at it!
Totally get that, Jay, and you are not wrong about fast fashion trends and junk clothing. My sentiment was more to the comment following yours. My buttons, they do get pushed from time to time, unfortunately.
Sigh…why is it that lately every time I find a little bit of time to come here, there’s another misogynist post by the usual suspect? I mean if the site really doesn’t want women coming here, please say so and I’ll stop wasting my time.