Download it here. Contains some mature language.
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Now Available from RiffTrax…
17 Replies to “Now Available from RiffTrax…”Commenting at Satellite News
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I know this is a big claim, but this may be one of the most inept, non-movies any of the riffing groups have done. It invites comparisons to “Starfighters,” but for very minor sports teams instead of the military. It is so dull that we began just talking over the dialog, then not understanding some “plot” point and not caring enough to go back and find out. I would not have been surprised if it was edited soft-core porn, except then the film would have actually had a purpose.
The guys try hard and get a few really good, sometimes very well planned jokes in, but yeesh, I don’t know if I can say this fills a full 80 minutes of entertainment. Which is something I hesitate to say even about the more mediocre rifftrax, but this film, this horrifying entity that perhaps started as a cross promo for a long forgotten restaurant in an alternate universe….this, this is something else.
And we thought Gymkata was dumb.
“Contains some mature language”
The film, not this forum. ;-)
But never mind that, let’s go HERE.
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Not on-topic at all, but here are some “insights” about the host segment plot of the “Mitchell” episode that most people around here probably reached long ago but which only occurred to me earlier this morning:
As we know, when, as a result of the SOL/D13 communication line being open despite the fact that no one on either end had opened it (and, really, what was THAT all about?), Gypsy overheard Dr. F and Frank discussing the death of a “be-jumpsuited” fool, whom they described as knowing that he was in a “temporary” position.
That means that (based on existing info, anyway) they couldn’t have been talking about Joel Robinson, since neither they nor Joel ever gave us any reason to think that the Mads were eventually going to bring Joel down from orbit.
Furthermore, as soon as Dr. F learned that Joel had escaped, he tried to “rescue” him (which is exactly what Gypsy had thought SHE was doing), and even someone as crazy as Dr. F probably wouldn’t care about rescuing someone that he was planning to KILL. Joel was GONE either way.
And if Joel was never in any danger, that means that Gypsy sent him to Earth for no real reason (except to allow Joel Hodgson an excuse to “abandon” the series, but never mind that).
Since the Mads weren’t planning to kill Joel, they must have been planning to instead kill MIKE. The only reason that they instead sent Mike to the SOL was because Joel had escaped (without even planning to do so) and they needed Mike to replace him.
So, ultimately, Gypsy didn’t save Joel’s life, she saved MIKE’S life.
The thing is, Crow and Tom loved Joel and had no particular reason to care if Dr. F’s temp worker lived or died (all they knew about him was what they and we saw during the Invention Exchange). If the Mads were going to kill some stranger, well, what was that to them? People kill other people on Earth every day.
So in effect Gypsy turned everyone’s lives upside-down for what Crow and Tom, at least, probably wouldn’t have considered much of a reason. “Oh, good one, Gypsy!”
Fortunately, neither Gypsy nor Crow and Tom seem to have ever figured all of this out. Cambot (who saw at least as much of the situation as we did) might have figured it out, but when has anyone ever asked for Cambot‘s opinion?
In fact, lacking any other explanation, it can only have been Cambot who opened the line which allowed Gypsy to overhear the Mads in the first place.
But why…?
Obviously, of course, it’s just a show and, to mo me, thinking this through qualified as, well, if not “relaxing” per se, at least having fun. ;-)
When the show cuts to Deep 13 after Gypsy answers the call, Frank is leaning on the keyboard of the console with his entire right forearm. I’ve always thought that’s how the line was opened – Frank did it accidentally.
I think Gypsy had a lot of guilt over getting Mike trapped on the SoL, which is why she was almost always so nice to him throughout the rest of the CC run. She took him under her coils right away, and my headcanon is she protected him a bit from Tom and Crow’s pranks until he got over the initial shock of being kidnapped and trapped.
But I love thoughts like yours and discussions like this. That’s what makes being a fan so fun!
When I think of “mature language,” I think of things like, ‘closing costs,’ or, ‘prostatitis,’ or, ‘where did my life go so terribly wrong!!??!!”
As we age, naughty words seem to lose their importance, in the scheme of things.
Mr. Krasker:
Movie reviews still list why films have their MPAA ratings.
There are websites devoted to how “family friendly” new motion pictures are.
Naughty words will not lose their importance when the MPAA still gives films an “R” rating for profanity and a “PG-13” rating for violence.
(again off-topic)
In some other thread, someone asked when there would be a DVD for MST3K Volume 40. I regret to report (as someone may have already reported) that apparently the only MST3K episodes that haven’t yet been released on DVD all feature films that the Brains (or whoever) aren’t licensed to release on DVD, so Volume 39 is the last one for the foreseeable future. :-|
Those films are these films (unless I’m wrong; I am on a distressingly regular basis):
The Amazing Colossal Man (it was through some sort of oversight that it was earlier released on VHS)
Attack of the Eye Creatures
The Deadly Bees
Fire Maidens from Outer Space
Godzilla vs. the Sea Monster (it was through another such sort of oversight that Godzilla vs. Megalon appeared on Volume 10; later releases of Volume 10 feature The Giant Gila Monster instead)
I Was a Teenage Werewolf
It Conquered the World
Quest of the Delta Knights
Rocketship X-M
The Space Children
Terror from the Year 5000
Really, “mature language” is usually anything but mature. I think the phrase “explicit language” is gradually replacing it.
Ohh, the FILM! Well, can’t they just put an umbrella over somebody’s mouth?
For a second, I’d thought Angry Kevin had realized that RT’s entrepreneurial freedom from cable had opened up innovative new riffing frontiers beyond “Well, whoop-de-s**t!”
First read the line and sighed, “Yyyyep, they were going to figure it out sooner or later….”
Growing up, I never usually heard that many people curse a blue streak, except for other junior-high kids, sports fans, and bag ladies. Never quite sold me on the image.
Wasn’t an oversight, Megalon and Sea Monster WERE public domain at the time FVI stamped their brand on them for TV, and when Vol. 10.1 came out.
They aren’t now, though, now that Toho has circled their corporate Kaiju wagons, but at the time, you could find those two movies on just about any $5 VHS.
(Which, we offer the periodic reminder, is why you buy Shout DVD sets while the getting is good.) :)
Yeah.
It’s almost like I was making a joke, or something.
Perhaps not.
“Eliminate” is the word Frank uses. “After all he knew going in this was only a temporary position.”
The joke is that it could be construed that they are plotting murder, and Gypsy is gullible enough to believe it. However, these two cream puffs are incapable of anything so heinous. They were just planning on how they would humiliate Mike by firing him. They were in it for the Schadenfruede kicks.
I would not have been surprised if it was edited soft-core porn, except then the film would have actually had a purpose.
I think that’s actually true. IMDB has the running time as a whole half-hour longer than the 72 minutes Rifftrax gave us. There can’t be that much more plot to this drivel, so I’m thinking a lot of 80s style female toplessness and awkwardly chaste bodies grinding against each other.
I did see that Amazon Prime Video has the entire uncut movie. I started watching it but bailed at about 10 minutes. It’s just such drivel! But there had already been a quick shot of our “hero” waking up next to a naked girl who considerately had her butt outside the covers for us viewers to ogle.
So that would support your supposition. I may go back and look at it again someday but I just can’t see ever being that bored.
Nah.
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0091995/parentalguide?ref_=tt_stry_pg
They shoulda done the 2007 SPIKER. (Tagline “You’ll never think of volleyball terminology the same way again!!!”)
All films have a purpose. In fact, all films have the identical purpose.
TO MAKE MONEY.
Some just don’t do it as well as others, that’s all.
;-)
only on-topic inasmuch as it relates to Rifftrax:
I just (literally, like a minute or so ago) came across the info that Alfred Hitchcock’s “Sabotage” (1936) is in the public domain, meaning that any given set of Brains can riff it if they so wish. Yet do The Brains dare take on The Master of Suspense?
(I mean, unless they’ve already done that…)
Yet do The Brains dare take on The Master of Suspense?
They’ve had mixed success taking on “good” movies.
Their Casablanca riff was flat & awkward; their Wizard of Oz is a laugh-out-loud classic. Most of the Marvels and Stars Wars (some are very good movies, others not-so), are just too long.
Overall, I prefer they don’t take on ‘good’ movies because I usually end up wishing they would shut up so I can watch the movie!
Well, after all, seeing the movie riff-free is just a matter of Netflix or Youtube or good old-fashioned DVDs from the library or some such thing. ;-)
It’s a shame (“It’s a darned shame!”) that a lot of films that are public domain are also so obscure that virtually no one knows about them. I’m thinking in terms of black-and-white films where the producers who forgot or didn’t bother to add the copyright, or failed to renew it. For every “High School Big Shot” or “Teen-Age Crime Wave” there are dozens more in the same vein.
IIRC all of MST3K’s straightforward drama films (like the two I cited above) involved criminal activity of some sort. I wonder if that was deliberate or just the luck of the draw.