The moment that immediately came to mind was the bizarre chicken dance from episode 605- Colossus and the Headhunters. Intended as slinky and salacious, it just comes out clunky and dumb.
What’s your pick?
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Weekend Discussion Thread: The Un-Sexiest Moment in a MSTed MovieThere are a lot of moments in the MSTed movies where they’re really going for something sexy…and they fail miserably.
115 Replies to “Weekend Discussion Thread: The Un-Sexiest Moment in a MSTed Movie”Commenting at Satellite News
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Clearly, “baby oil,” has to be it– followed closely by “pantyhose are itchy! Itchy, itchy, itchy!”
But, I would like to submit Thena offering sex to an adolescent in, “Quest of the Delta Knights.” That– and her gross, mushy cleavage.
those stevie nicks dancers
“Schick out of shape…” Hmmmm…there’s no puking icon on this forum?
Pretty much offtopic but relating to #91 above, about the dumb guard falling for grandmom’s blandishments, it reminds you of Scott Evil’s observation on his dad’s treatment of Austin Powers:
“an annoyed Scott exclaims, ‘You’re gonna put him in a cell with one inept guard and he’ll escape,’ “
tommy kirk kissing his eternally damned girlfriend in Village of the Giants. and no, we DID NOT deserve the tommy kirk buffalo shot.
I cast an additional vote for every stinking scene in “Hellcats” that was meant to show depravity. The actors were not up to that challenge, and in exchange we get pure, unmitigated revulsion.
This has inspired me to start a new thread, which you will see.
Does the Roji Panty Complex count?
What about in Devilfish when the guys coming down the stairs and “Hangs one out just for fun”. I’m not sure if it was an accident or not but it was certainly disturbing. :shock:
Hands down, BABY OIL!
Followed by that very STRANGE scene in Warrior of the Lost World with the guys in leather and whips. YUCK!
It’s hard to argue with any of these, but I think we must acknowledge the genius of Coleman Francis in crafting perfectly failed attempts at these scenes. I submit:
1) Naked shower women at the beginning of Beast of Yucca flats (see the unMsted version). The look on her face is so depressing that she manages to make being nude unsexy. When the beast kills her, she doesn’t even seem to care.
2) Horrible neglige woman from Beast of Yucca flats. “That’s a hard face. That’s a face that challenges you.”
3) Suzie from Skydivers. Beth from Skydivers. Frankie from Skydivers. Coffee guy from Skydivers. Tony Cardoza from Skydivers. The whole point of the film is to explore the sexual tension between these characters. Somehow, that does not quite work out.
4) The Mrs. Chastain teddy scene from Red Zone Cuba. Coleman takes another try at the climactic speech from Skydivers, figuring that it would work if the speaker was wearing fewer clothes. Oddly enough, that was not the problem.
5) The Coleman Francis, Harold Saunders and Tony Cardoza “you were wonderful” scene in Red Zone Cuba.
# 73: excellent point on Troll 2. Is it me, or did the actress look dramatically (pun intended) better in her early scenes than in the popcorn scene? If they showed that scene in sex-ed classes, in 100 years human beings would become extinct.
As for future topics, how about perfect riffs? Most of us have had times when we thought that there could have been a funnier riff, or when the delivery was flawed, or the joke fell flat. How about riffs where everything was flawless?
For example, I was watching Pumaman the other day, and I’d nominate Bill’s “Hahahahaha…no you look great,” when Vadinho first sees Tony in the Pumaman costume.
Action scene that is un-sexy:
“E”-van being taught how to sit on a shovel in Jack Frost. Gross.
Non-Action scene that is un-sexy:
Coleman Francis’ enormous package all splayed in Red Zone Cuba. Mike’s vocalization of coleman in that scene only adds to the disgust.
i gotta go take a shower.
One last unfunny sex scene;
Villiage of the Giants, the giant girls were saucy but when the dork in the cowboy hat was writhing between two giant paper mache’ breasts it just was wrong!
“Is that stud coming?”
Orgh–so much to choose from . . . Judging by the “rising gorge-o-meter”, I’d have to include these “sexy” scenes in my top 10:
1. The back brace and red long johns in “Spider Invasion”, and all that they stand for.
2. The midget-Nelson buffalo shots in “Outlaw”, plus the stupid viper-queen going at it with Watney.
3. Arch Hall, Jr. and the whole gang in “Eegah”: it’s so hard to choose just one moment here.
4. The whole scenario of “Boggy Creek”, what with the shirtless eunuch, the prof’s shorts, the scantily-clad grad students, etc., interspersed with Old Man Crenshaw, the foot in the crapper, etc. . . .
5. Grandma Leah and Doughy Guard in “Space Mutiny”, although Leah and Big McLargehuge going at it was a pretty good advertisement for celibacy, too.
6. The old horny people who get offed in “Melting Man”
7. The Backfat Special from “Laserblast”.
8. Any and all upsetting shorts and shirtless adolescent males.
9. “Racket Girls”–’nuff said.
10. All the tongue-augering by bland white ’50s-era scientists (“Mole People”, “Phantom Planet”.
To quote Crow from the end of “It Flies by Night”: “Yuck! I get the shower first!”
Any and all liturgical dancers…’nuff said.