Movie: (1985) In a fantasy kingdom, a wizard’s son and a warrior battle an evil wizard.
Opening: Max makes a fascinating discovery
Invention exchange: J&tB have Verbal Smoke Bombs; The Mads have the Sponsor Clock
Segment 1: Reasons Kor got the name “conquerer” and explanations for Kor’s face after killing four guys
Segment 2: Jonah sings “The Magic Inside of You”
Segment 3: J&tB read some viewer mail
Closing: Jonah shows Tom the “Wizards of the Suicide Cave: A Place that Feeds on Fear” play set
Stinger: The bowl explodes
(83 votes, average: 3.82 out of 5)
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• The first time I watched this one, I really didn’t like it. The movie is just soooo cheap. But this time through, I found myself laughing quite a bit. I’m definitely upgrading my opinion. But, ugh, this movie.
• The whole mysterious key plot in Moon 13 starts with this episode. I’m not quite sure it works, but, like with this episode, I’m giving it another chance.
• Chris Hardwick has gotta be happy for namecheck.
• One of the things people gripe about with the relaunch is that it’s sometimes hard to distinguish between Tom’s and Crow’s voices. I usually don’t have that problem, but if you wanted to cite a good example of that, look no further than the numerous Cryptkeeper impressions in this episode, which both Tom and Crow seem able to do quite easily and interchangeably.
• There’s no credit for “The Magic Inside of You,” so I have to assume it’s another Paul and Storm gem.
• Callback: “…tampered in God’s domain.” (Bride of the Monster)
• Jonah mentions Dr. F and Frank and Joel and Mike. I know, I know, it’s just a show, but should he know about any of that? Maybe the bots told him?
• No Rowsdower reference? Seemed pretty obvious to me. Maybe they decided it was too obvious?
• Cast and Crew Roundup: Thom Christopher was also in “Deathstalker and the Warriors from Hell.” Roger Corman … well, that’s all I need to say.
• Fave riff: “Ralph Maccios assemble!” Honorable mention: “I would face a thousand cyclops brides before I swam through whatever that is.” “Oh they’re showing ‘Little House on the Prairie.’”
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The cold opening is fun. Max’s diary entry brings home the point who among us hasn’t had a crush at some point on an unobtainable authority figure. But questions are raised. What will Max do with his new found friend? And did all the mail he put in that slot ever get delivered?
The invention exchange was pretty good. The conversation smoke bomb is actually quite practical though I thought the examples they came up with were a bit blah. The sponsor clock was great and well sold. But I couldn’t help noticing they still have a few spots left to sell. Anybody have any ideas?
Missed callback riff: During the clip of the random fight scenes in the movie’s opening my mind went to good natured brawling.
OK. How did Simon drop the ring on the floor but it ended up in a gargoyle’s barely open mouth?
The letter host segment was fun in a reminiscent sort of way. Never mind the binge WATCHING of Netflix. The binge recording method used for season 11 robs us of the feedback of receiving viewer mail. I do miss that.
The last Patton bumper voiceover is disturbing. I always knew the Mads were watching [fill in the blank] and the Bots, but now we learn Kinga and Max are watching us as well.
It really was a cute discussion over the credit of Simon’s reign turning brutal and oppressive. I want to see that movie.
Favorite Riffs:
Aura is thrown in a dungeon. Tom “You have to sleep in the basement while Grandma Sleeps in your room.”
Tom on Gulfax “A young Scott Baio takes his pet Wampa to the park.”
Gulfax says something. Crow “Oh he’s not yelling. He’s throwing up in his costume.”
Tom “Patrick Duffy is Greg Brady in Julius Caesar.”
Disembodied voice of Aura “Help me Simon.” Tom “Is not something people say much.”
I thought this episode was pretty enjoyable on the whole.
I do have a small gripe, and not just with this episode. To me, the songs just aren’t cutting it. For the most part they’re not particularly funny, nor are the tunes very catchy. Often, the songs seem kind of obligatory, i.e. “The old show had songs, so we should do some too.”
BTW, if I remember correctly this movie was the one that had the hot woman leading the kid into the lair of hot women, promising to fulfill his every desire. Considering the kid was maybe 14, tops, that struck me as incredibly inappropriate, and I was surprised that Jonah & the bots never commented on it.
But those were actually funny and only got funnier as they went along.
The problem with “Game of Cutting Off Heads” was it came all at once and reeked of HUH HUH, YA GET IT? NUDGE NUDGE
Like several other riffs this season it just felt really belabored…
Think they were just a little overexcited that they could do a “current” 10’s-era riff that the old show couldn’t do–It was the first GoT riff Netflix had ever done (and, presumably, “anyone else” had ever done), so, they’ll DO IT!
Sort of like the Mike era, when it belabored “current” cable-era parodies of Mentos, A&E, “Renegade” or Bullseye BBQ commercials with ten times as much sweat, or Rifftrax when it hits upon a clever Internet-cult riff.
Also, the Jonah era is pleased when they can do binge-TV riffs, since it feels like more of a special in-joke coming from “their” generation, and they feel “part” of it, being on Netflix. Which is why we got the Wings-binge sketch in 1108, and other similar nibbles at the streaming/cable hand that feeds it.
I like this one and consider it to be one of the better episodes of the season, not sure where it lands in my rankings but I’d say maybe the 5 or 6 slot? We’ll see when we finish up this season.
Personal note: this is the episode that has my name in the Kickstarter credits. Not gonna lie, kinda love that my name is on an episode of MST3k.
This is a good one, the movie is a weird mamma-jamma with plenty of creature makeups and special effects, not necessarily GOOD makeups and effects, but still, they had them and they used ’em! This kind of 80s fantasy film is right up my alley, I had never heard of this one (or the sequel) before, so I enjoyed it on that level. As for the MST episode itself, the Opening with Max finding the key and the metal monster is fine, but the payoff didn’t really work for me at the end of the season. The Invention Exchange is good and clever fun, I could use those Verbal Smoke Bombs in my daily life, for real. The riffing moves along and is solid, however the Crabby jokes do not work for me at all, it’s kind of confusing at first what that voice is supposed to be related to onscreen and when you realize it’s the bad guy’s hat it’s like “oh, ok” but they keep returning to the joke over and over, ugh, it just never works for me (and I’ve watched this one four times now). At least Jonah bonks the heads of the Bots after one too many Cryptkeeper impersonations.
Host Segment #1 is fine but kind of peters out.
HS#2 has a choir of multiple Crows, which is a change of pace, but he does make a better undead creature than Servo would. The song is good.
HS#3 features LETTERS, which is always a fun time, especially when Crow freaks out. “You sell that mind prison jazz to another show!”
RIFFS:
Crow: “Kind of a low key Pride Parade this year.”
Jonah: “What about ‘banned from Dave & Busters’ don’t you understand, buddy?!”
Jonah: “Um, Kev, you’re green dude. This is some dank weed!”
Servo: “Can you even hear me when you’re green, man? Oh no, he’s gone, that’s harsh, ..and I’m all out of stoner jargon.”
Crow: “Anthony Weiner, NO!”
Crow: “Gulfax does a killer Stallone.”
Jonah: “I’m a kid, I shouldn’t be working on a pot farm.”
Crow: “Tell them I died trying to kill an adult…”
Crow: “Backstage at Bonnaroo.”
Servo: “My bundt cake!”
Servo: “I’m a cuddler!”
Crow: “Great dress rehearsal everyone, don’t forget to give your costumes back to Debbie.”
Crow: “Bruce Dern?”
Jonah: “Dork of the Flies.”
Jonah: “Always awkward to run into an ex.”
Crow: “How I Met Your Mother got real weird.”
Servo: “Freddie Mercury is losing it.”
Gypsy: “The outfit says ‘elf,’ but the mustache says CHI-CA-GO PO-LICE!”
Crow: “Tell my story!!”
Jonah: “He’s calling on the power of Motorhead.”
—
–
Another great episode,
I give this one
4 out of 5 magic rings (the other was lost by Simon)
Yeah, I’d agree with that, now that you mention it.
“To call it an anticlimax would be an insult not only to climaxes but to prefixes.” — Roger Ebert
He was a PET. He shouldn’t have been EXPECTED to advance the plot.
Chewbacca’s a PERSON and how often did he ever advance a plot?
No, they didn’t.
See, refuting someone’s point is just that easy.
And the Joel Era was totally free of that sort of thing? Is that what you’re asking us to believe?
I think the much better question is why would anyone NOT want to be pandered to?
It doesn’t automatically make it NOT funny or NOT great, either. What’s your point?
No. There doesn’t. Thus I refute thee.
I know this is kinda late to the party, but you know where I can see this press conference ad-lib bit? Sounds neat.
*You’re* commenting on how we all “get” something and it should stop??
My irony meter just exploded.
Delete your account.
Gare
Or like the Joel era, with Sessions Presents, et all?
Delete your account.
Gare
Along with Monty Python riffs in at least half of the Joel episodes and Wizard of Oz riffs in well over 70% of them. More or less.
ADDENDUM:
Oh, and the Jim Henson’s _____ Babies riffs, which continue to this day. Mustn’t forget those. :-)
Joel even made a point of reviving that during some of his Rifftrax work.
Jonah said in an interview earlier this spring that Joel is the one who is pretty much obsessed with The Muppets, beyond just enjoying them. So I get the feeling a good chunk of Muppet riffs, past and present, come from him.
But I’ll take a Muppet riff any day over the same handful of Wizard of Oz riffs he’s used for 30 years now.
Nnnnnnnoooo, not quite. Go back over it a couple more times, and keep working on it.
More like the hard work and effort the Mads put into their “Squaremaster” parody, or Joel’s “Amazing Discoveries” parody from Phantom Creeps, while those refs were still fresh, trending, and annoying us on 90’s-cable infomercials, only they didn’t beat the “It’s current!” shock-value and personal bloodlust into the ground in place of Funny.
(Unlike M&tB’s Bullseye-BBQ parody, which just seemed to go on forever in its daring, satirical one-joke boooooolllld!!-ness.)
Well, he did feel “sorta like Mac Davis” singing that love song to Gypsy in “The Sidehackers”.
You know what? We get it. You’re a condescending hypocrite who intensely dislike everything about MST3K except for the Joel episodes, including MST3K fans who like episodes other than the Joel episodes. You’ve conveyed that admirably. WE GET IT, OKAY?
Don’t you know any other songs? How ’bout “MacArthur Park”?
That’s a valid criticism. Certain riffs in season 11 run on too long, almost as if they were afraid to edit any writer’s contributions or leave any silence gaps. But sometimes less is more.
That said, I do like this episode and its sequel.
“MacArthur Park” is a great song!
Dear TheOriginalEricJ: Hear me, once again: YOU. ARE. NOT. PERMITTED. TO. QUOTE. ME. Stop dragging me into your crap. This is not “feeding the troll”. This is a warning. I’ve rolled my eyes and scrolled rapidly past your screeds for way too long now, but your cruelty on the Bruce J. Mitchell post was the final straw. I do not find your shenanigans amusing. I do not believe you are a troll, but a person who truly believes the vitriol they’re spewing, which is even more depressing (yes, I’ve skimmed your website and Google+ pages). Why would I go there? To “know thy enemy” (among other tasks). THIS ENDS NOW.
I was “riffing” with some (slightly misremembered) dialogue from an episode of “Angel” (the Buffy spinoff), “The Shroud of Rahmon.”
Angel, to Gunn: “You know, I’m getting pretty sick of this vampires-killed-my-sister-so-now-I’m-all-entitled song. Don’t you know anything else? Like say, ah, MacArthur Park?””
;-)
They just don’t WRITE songs like that anymore!
To revisit something from an earlier thread, someone said something about Frank Coniff personally telling OriginalEricJ what a (in so many words yet twice as many syllables) jerk he is. Sounds intriguing to me. Anyone know any more about that? Thanks. :-)
Quote, “And whatever that EricJ guy says, just do the opposite”. Appended onto some other promotion for one of his live-shows with Trace….First, last and end of story.
(Would’ve been nice if it had been personal, meant he was spending more time around here…Heck, I’d even be grateful for a SECOND out-of-context drive-by comment.
Despite the Epic Folk-Legend that’s been very, very, very, very, very wishfully built up around it, A), it wasn’t personal, B), it wasn’t a righteously outraged stand in defense of his comic comrades over who deserved to be recognized as the true soul and genius of the show, and C), I don’t think he even had the first clear freakin’ idea what the heck we were all talking about, but he got a quick one-read gist from everyone else’s gripe about who or what was the big “trademark” around the room.
So: Basically just kissing-up, like when you warm up the audience with local jokes in standup. There’s the recap–Next question? :)
Ohh, hit a nerve there did I? Well, no, I didn’t – I just called you out, once again, on how vapid and transparent your complaints are regarding *anything* that isn’t Joel.
You sad, sad little boy.
Delete your f-ing account.
Gare
It was *clearly* personal. He called you out by name, you dope. And we know Frank does idle here at times, so he’s obviously seen enough of your vitriol to form his own cogent opinion. Believe it or not – your idols don’t idolize you – Frank flat out said to ignore you and do the opposite of what you say.
Face reality – you’re unlikable, and un-liked.
Yes, next question – when will you be deleting your account, you miserable little bridge troll?
Gare
(I was “That guy”. How “personal” can it be when you’re literally AND figuratively That Guy??) ;)
Your own quote: “And whatever that EricJ guy says, just do the opposite”
You weren’t “That Guy”… you were “That EricJ guy”.
I know reading comprehension is tough for you, especially when it’s something that doesn’t agree with your limited mind-set, but believe it or not, you’re undone by your own quoted reference.
Oh, and stop using smiley face emoticons – those are reserved for friends. You have no friends here, or one imagines, anywhere.
Delete you account.
Gare
Have Jonah and the Bots really interacted with Max enough to be able to tell if Max is behaving strangely (by his particular standards) or not? Maybe between episodes…
So, almost beyond your capacity to enjoy, then? ;-)
And yet that describes a huge percentage of the movies that have been riffed throughout the entire history of riffing. Because for the most part people make films for MONEY. PERIOD.
Doesn’t the phrase “They Just Didn’t Care” ring a bell or two? ;-)
It’s not unlike what Stan Lee once said about comic books in an early Amazing Spider-Man letter column (I know it was in ASM because it was reprinted in an issue of Marvel Tales) [exact words not guaranteed]: “We don’t care if you buy ’em because you like to pull out the staples, just so long as you keep on buyin’ ’em!”
:-)
Original EricJ haunts us all. Like the spectre of nuclear annihilation. Only not as encouraging.
“That’s [one of] the most nauseating proposition[s] I’ve ever heard…”
Even younger than Young Anakin Skywalker, then? ‘Cause young Anakin Skywalker looked really quite young to me…
Anyway, it seemed like kind of an arranged royal marriage setup thing to me. I doubt either of them have much choice in the matter so they’ve probably spent most of their lives being encouraged to just Deal With It.
ADDENDUM
Besides, “too young to want a girlfriend” nothin’, some “mainstream” films have depicted outright sex between what society currently defines as “children.” Here’s just one example:
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0079806/?ref_=nv_sr_4
Won’t be seeing material like that riffed any time soon, I suspect.
I think writer Elliot Kalan is behind the abundance of Muppet references in S11. He has made frequent mention in the flophouse podcast about sharing the Muppet movies with his young son, expressing pride that his son is so fond of the Muppet songs etc.
Either way, it sounds kind of anticlimactic (not your fault, of course). I thought Frank had addressed OEJ (Orange E____ Juice?) specifically and actually called him a two-syllable-synonym-for-jerk-that-starts-with-d-and-ends-with-bag (does that word qualify as profanity? I honestly do not know). So it goes.
redux:
“No Rowsdower reference? Seemed pretty obvious to me. Maybe they decided it was too obvious?”
Personally, I’d have preferred a Bix Dugan/Big Stupid reference. Same basic principle but more “obscure,” y’know. ;-)
IMHO the films from the Comedy Central episodes don’t get enough callbacks. A few but not enough.
As many commentators probably don’t know (or care), Wizards of the Lost Kingdom (itself not to be confused with the “Lost Continent”) has more links to Deathstalker and the Warriors from Hell than the obvious notion that Shurka and Troxartes might be the same guy (death means not quite as much to a wizard, y’know; not necessarily nothing but not quite as much).
Simon’s plan to resurrect the dead to fight on his behalf is, of course, pretty much the same as Troxartes’s command of the Warriors from Hell themselves. Also, scenes from the first Deathstalker film are part of the opening montage.
Furthermore, the footage of human sacrifice and weird battling deities (Vitahl and Caligara, like it matters) is lifted directly from the film Sorceress (1982) (reviewed at the following link), implying that Wizards of, the Deathstalker films, and Sorceress all take place in the same for lack of a better term shared universe (if you’re into that kind of thing):
http://www.stomptokyo.com/badmoviereport/reviews/S/sorceress.html
(the images formerly had theoretically humorous captions but they’re gone now; tsk, tsk)
Sorceress even involves yet more resurrections from the dead.
On a separate note, some of Wizards of‘s score is lifted from Battle Beyond the Stars (1980), generally considered to be a significantly better Star Wars ripoff than the earlier Starcrash. So there’s that, anyway.
Wizards of the Lost Kingdom II uses footage from additional films, adding to the shared universe even more, but that can wait a few days. :-)
Oh, for the heck of it, here’s a second review of Sorceress, which is NSFW:
https://teleport-city.com/2010/02/08/sorceress-2/
FEEL FREE TO DISCUSS ;-)
(I’m going to end up posting to myself again and again — again — aren’t I? Oh well. I’ve only got today to get further comments on this episode in since the next episode’s comments start tomorrow.)
BTW, am I mistaken, or was Princess Aura (not to be confused with the Flash Gordon character of the same name), who was definitely the daughter of King Tylor, also the daughter of Queen Udea, who betrayed Tylor (her husband) to Shurka (her adulterous lover)?
(unless I’m wrong)
That would, remarkably, make Shurka subsequently putting the moves on Aura even creepier. Even if Udea was only Aura’s (to coin a phrase) wicked stepmother, there’d still be an ick factor.
ADDENDUM: Upon re-watching, I see that the film did indeed specify that Udea was Aura’s stepmother. So there, I guess.
Like Morgul the Friendly Drelb?
“Obi-wan Kenobi won’t return my calls…”
Magic bounces. It doesn’t behave, but it bounces.
I suspect that the list of things that OriginalEricJ DOESN’T despise is a short list indeed. If he restricted his knowledge to things that he doesn’t despise, I doubt he’d be capable of, well, of participating in internet forums.
Did you fly in from 1935? Are your arms tired?
;-)
I thought they were making the point that Game of Thrones itself runs things like “cutting off heads” into the ground.
No, it’s Reptilicus Martenius. Oh, wait…
He’d be more reminiscent of Ortega in that we wouldn’t understand a word he said. ;-)
Incidentally, IMHO riffs about Facebook, Kickstarter, Craigslist, Tinder, and so on barely qualify as riffs at all. That’s not pop culture, it’s just…life, like 911 and 1-900 numbers. But whatever.
They’re correct. Absolutely correct. Damn, they’re good.
Kor says “underdog” and…nothing? That should’ve been almost a demand of the law of physics OSLT.
“Does everybody in this kingdom have the power to spy on each other?” That might call for a riff on “The Dead Past” by Isaac Asimov if the show were into literary references but how many people read these days? Poor dopes.
The four ghoul warriors remind me of an episode of Jason Bateman’s “It’s Your Move” — “We are the Dregs!” — which would make for a riff obscure enough for Joel himself to applaud it. Unless it didn’t.
The lizard guys looked more like Gamorrean Guards to me.
“Suicide Cavern” doesn’t sound like a very frightening name to me. Depressing, yes, but not frightening. It reminds me of the “Dungeons & Dragons will warp the pwecious childwen” phase of the eighties.
Upon closer perusal, okay, I can see how the Kor-tied-to-a-tree scene sort of strenuously insisted upon a Rowsdower/Troy riff. Or at least a Cave Dwellers riff (“Hard to cut through your wrists” in that distinct Thong/Gomez voice).
So, after escaping the fate of going into a stew pot, Kor ends up swimming in a lake of “beef water”? That shouldn’t have been a difficult connection to riff upon. Oh well.