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Weekend Discussion Thread: MSTed Movie You’d Like to Live InAlert reader Charles asks (Have we done this? I’ve long since given up trying to keep track):
For me (you may already guess), any reality where Batwoman is around is okay by me. What’s your pick? 94 Replies to “Weekend Discussion Thread: MSTed Movie You’d Like to Live In”Commenting at Satellite News
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All content posted on Satellite News is copyright © 2024 by Chris Cornell and Brian Henry, except where otherwise noted. This Date in MSTory is written and compiled by Steve Finley, Chris Cornell and Brian Henry. Copyright © 2024 All rights reserved. Please do not reproduce This Date in MSTory items in any form without express written permission from the authors. Items of MST3K news may be duplicated or reposted, as long as Satellite News is cited as the source. The views and opinions expressed herein are not necessarily those of Satellite of Love, LLC. No warranty is expressed or implied that the information given herein is completely accurate, and in fact this information can and will change at any time. So there. Mystery Science Theater 3000, its characters and situations are copyrights and trademarks of Satellite of Love, LLC. Banner image created by Larry Lee Moniz. |
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Then I’ll recruit Pink Boy to make those small withdrawals. From there he can buy himself a personality.
It was his idea, after all.
(To the Simpson’s Quik-E Mart Song)
Who needs that edit tab?
… I dooo
Now, it gets weird.
-I’ve got a Prime membership. I bought it a year or two ago. I just watched it two nights ago.
-If I don’t sign in, I get the same message you did.
-If I do sign in, I can watch it.
Does this mean that if you didn’t buy it in the past, you can’t buy it now? Uh…if you’re not a Prime member, ask someone you know who is to check it out, see if it’s still for sale to them.
In any case, I found this:
https://www.microsoft.com/en-us/p/the-hypnotic-eye/8d6kgwzl627x?activetab=pivot%3aoverviewtab
And, yes, it’s worth the hassle.
Do like any good cook, always leave out one important step. For neck juice, just don’t mention that you have to thicken it with arrowroot, or you get a mess…
Pretty much: “Unavailable” means it isn’t in their catalogue anymore, as a lot of dubiously-released obscure movies come and go.
And FTR, “Prime” isn’t the same as their purchase library, Prime is the Netflix-style “free” streaming you get with the free-shipping membership you originally spent all that money for in the first place. Prime is more like that little favorite obscure mom-and-pop rental by the strip mall, the one that had all those weird obscure VHS’s in the back if you looked far enough, but the copy of last month’s hit was always out.
If the title’s off the catalog due to rights/OOP issues, however, even purchasing the title won’t help you….”All Your Movies, Forever”, my aunt Fanny.
Not sure if we’re still talking about Hypnotic Eye or Counterplot, but a quick check shows the former as Currently Unavailable, and the latter still is.
Ja, and as I mentioned, I watched “Hypnotic Eye” the other night on Amazon Prime, to double-check what I was telling Ro-Man.
Checking my account info, I paid $9.99 in 2016 for it, which is “own,” not “view.” Can’t download, but it remains on Prime.
So what’s the deal with it now being on MicroSoft? I neither know nor care.
I can’t express how bored I get with retreads on the West Coast in Men’s Warehouse three-piece suits arguing over the rights to obscure properties from the Ford Administration. At some point, I’m going to go out and shoplift “Fresno,” “Let the Good Times Roll,” and “Skiddoo”–and, for that matter, “Song of the South” and “Tobacco Road”–and let those yo-yos get their strings untangled at their leisure.
“Catalina Caper”. Those wacky kids and goofy adults just seem like so much fun!
The world of “Angels’ Revenge” certainly has some advantages. The street-level drug dealers are whiny dopes who faint at the sight of blood. The kingpins are inept. Their enforcers couldn’t beat a seven-year-old girl. The entire operation can be destroyed by a handful of alarmingly dim-witted women. And the neo-Nazis are even dumber and less effective than the drug dealers. Taking all of this into consideration, it’s a world where it would be really easy to eliminate a lot of evil.
On the other hand, it’s the ’70s.
The world of “Boggy Creek II” seems pretty nice. You can get a college degree, or even become a respected professor, just by driving around in a Jeep, camping, boating, and occasionally listening to hicks tell stories about their encounters with a mythical creature who turns out to be totally harmless.
It goes without saying that I’d live in the world of The Magic Sword, with kings and princesses and witches and ogres and curses and dragons and two-headed assistants. A world where noble knights are preserved for a time when heroes are needed.
I would pick the Fugitive Alien movies. They were based on a trilogy of novels (the Starwolf Trilogy) by Edmond Hamilton and set in a heavily populated galaxy where planets had different mutations of humans (basically who adapted to the new planets) and Earthmen work as mercenaries.
If you watch the movies they make no sense, but if you’ve read the books, you can actually make a glimmer of it.
If I was still single it would be off to the 13th moon of Jupiter for me. A world populated almost exclusively by unattached young ladies who pass the time dancing barefoot and tying each other up while competing for the odd guy who drops by, could do worse.
As it is I think I’d like to take my wife to the neat future we get a glimpse of. Hopefully they would have some nifty Star Trek grade medical technology. I could really use some of that.
The neat future I referenced was at the end of The Day Time Ended. Oops, nooooo edit button.
I’d be more than happy to live in the time of “The Days of Our Years”, or “Last Clear Chance”. I mean sure, they were Union Pacific safety movies (though in fact they were really thinly disguised CYA movies, since the railroad was never really responsible for anything). All that being said – it was a simpler time, when you could stop by the diner in the morning and kiss Helen, or sit around the picnic table and have a chat with the local constabulary while ignoring all the chores on the farm.
But I mean for real.. outside of running headlong into the sides of moving trains or forgetting to apply Gentle Pressure.. the world these people lived in was simple and pleasant. I’d seriously dig being able to go to the diner in the morning, do some good solid work during the day, and go back to my affordable tract housing at night (back when you could actually afford a new home on one salary).
Gare
Off-topic: Are we going to be doing Season 12 episode guide entries anytime soon?
¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
just ask anybody who did their time crouching under their desk in third grade in an A-bomb drill
There were ashtrays and second hand smoke in every room and the outside of your affordable house was clad in asbestos. There was a jug of DDT in your one car garage next to the cleaning fluid made of benzene. On the streets people of color did not exist in your part of town unless you were one, yourself. But on the plus side…
You knew your neighbors by their first names and could depend on them in an emergency. Halloween was a kid’s holiday where candy was king and the meanest thing that would happen would be somebody saying “Trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat”. People still thought the future would be gloriously filled with flying cars and rockets to Mars and nuclear power would make electricity too cheap to meter. The nicest thing, as mentioned, was that working people were paid a living wage and corporations did not expect taxpayers to subsidize them. That was how it was.
But would he have time to do it; because he has to manage the Undertaker.
I was going to ask, too (something about “We’re not going to cycle the episode listings again until S12 airs?”), but for a change, didn’t want to be That Guy.
You knew your neighbors well enough to count on them IF their grandmas spoke the same language as yours, and your families went to the same church.
Halloween was when you knocked over outhouses, and the A-list strategy was to wait till somebody went in. And setting fire to cats was a big part of the fun.
We saw the future as a dead heat between space colonization and nuclear holocaust (I will never forgive Life Magazine for showing us pictures of our colonies on Mars that we’d have in place by 1985).
And in our entire history, we had a “living wage” for about thirty years, from the middle of WWII to the end of the Vietnam War, BECAUSE WE WERE IN A CONSTANT STATE OF HOT AND COLD WAR THE ENTIRE TIME, and we were perenially short on workers. When we bailed out of Saigon, the unemployment rate shot up 50% and didn’t come down significantly until the dot.com bubble.
This is why I LOVE black-and-white movies from the forties through early sixties. The past is safely sealed in .avi files, where I can take it out, poke it, and then put it away.
Why is it that we’re not supposed to be nostalgic for the good things of the past, simply because there were also bad things in the past? Seems like, as a culture, we’ve thrown away the baby with the bathwater.
You are right in appreciating nostalgia. There is also something to be said for “if you don’t remember the past you are doomed to repeat it”.
“Marvel the Mustang. He’s almost for real.” is nostalgic and I love it. Pointing out sexism in The Screaming Skull and other fifties/sixties episodes is remembering history and I love that, too.
I want to live in the universe of Track of the Moon Beast. It has camping … mystic native American professor friend … hot visiting researcher babes … reptiles … The Band the Played California Lady … meteor showers … mutant monsters …… stew. It’s an old recipe for an exciting life.
Same reason that it’s never a good idea to call up an ex on New Year’s Eve. When we start getting all squishy about the yang, and lose sight of the yin, mistakes proliferate.
Horrible, horrible mistakes.
And, hey, I’m wearing terry-cloth. You guys need anything absorbed?
The world of the Gamera movies seems pretty good. Giant monsters are real, but they never seem to hurt anybody. Aliens exist, and most of them are attractive women in skin tight clothing. The biggest downside would be the constant small children interfering with the functions of the military and government…
Progress Island, USA seems like a nice place.
In light of recent events… the world of “Assignment: Venezuela” doesn’t seem so great now.
Well.. except that one lovely night with Ray…
Gare
The premiums for homeowner’s insurance are likely not that affordable.
Yeah, but on the other hand you didn’t have to put up with Amazon Prime screwing around.
Or the bathwater with the baby, depending on how much you hate children . . .
Sorry I’m late with this, but I wouldn’t mind living in “Uncle Jim’s Dairy Farm” or “A Day at the Fair”. They both remind me of my youthful days spending the summer at my Ancestral Home in northeastern PA. One thing, though: the cow barns I was around were nowhere near as antiseptically clean as the one at Uncle Jim’s. It’s a cow barn, for Pete’s sake!
And American and Japanese housewives live in peace and harmony, always saying “Hello” and “Thank you”.
Horrors of Spider Island. Running around on a tropical island with scantily clad go-go dancers. What’s not to love?
There’s also the time-warp environment of “Is This Love”, where you can date Colonel Sanders, or still be living in a dorm at age 50. Even if you’re a Romulan.
Gare
Aside from the fact that the scantily clad go-go dancers in question are all shrill harpies. :P
But…but the URNING potential!
I forgot about J.C. Penney Hooker Wear. Another reason to love that universe.
And since Alert Reader Charles (and everybody else) has trouble remembering the topic of previous WDTs, it would be really nice if there was a category under Legacy Pages for past WDTs. I find myself wanting to refer back to a previous WDT, but having a hard time remembering when it was done. There’s no easy way to find it out. That would be extra work for the already over-worked mods. Consider this as an offer to help out.
I echo (locate) the Batwoman sentiment.
I love that woman. They don’t make them like that anymore.
I would also help to update the list of past WDTs. I believe this is the latest one and it’s six years old, fer cryin’ out loud: https://www.mst3kinfo.com/?p=14510
I didn’t even know there was a list to update! Thanks for the info. An updated list would be Big Mclargehuge-ly fantastic!
Sorry, late to the game. I’m surprised no one’s mentioned The Southern Sun. There’s a good chance that being fatally shot won’t be fatal. And you can survive fiery golf cart explosions. Just be careful around gas expulsion sumps and railings, and you’ll potentially live forever!