In most high school yearbooks, the students are voted “Best Looking” or “Most Athletic” or any other number of titles. So what would a yearbook of characters from MST3K movies look like? Would Jimmy from “I Accuse My Parents” be voted “Biggest Liar”? Would “Mitchell” be voted “Most Likely to Have a Heart Attack at a Krispy Kreme”? The possibilities are endless!
Well, I dunno about endless, but how about Tom Pittman from “High School Big Shot” getting named most likely to lose a MILLION BUCKS!:
Any other suggestions?
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Commando Cody – most likely to die in a fiery vehicular- no, wait, now it says most likey to survive a fiery vehicular crash.
Bob Evel in Time Chasers: most likely to run a major corporation from
a library foyer.
Crack reporter Lisa Benson of the Banner (formerly the Shopping News):
most likely to commit fashion no nos, say wearing two kinds of plaid at one time.
All the people at the dance in “The Creeping Terror” voted most likely to be eaten by a slow-moving carpet.
Incredibly, there was a tie between Michelle and Finley “Critter” Jones for the superlative of “Most Untalented in Any Performing Art Ever, Especially Dancing and Weird Simpering Folk Music”!
And, of course, Donald “Kobras” Pleasance won “Most Likely to Have Aztec Mask Power Fetish while Being Bald…But Mostly, Being Bald”.
Little Richard… Most Likely to Fail a Drug Test. I love saying someone’s Hopped up on Goofballs!
Agent Sam Casey from Riding With Death: most likely to be an OPTICAL ILLUSION
Ator and Rowsdower tie for “Best Hair”.
Cameron Mitchell in Space Mutiny “Most Likely to be Mistaken for Santa”.
Sherry from Space Mutiny: Most likely to return from the dead.
Kendra Eldridge: Most likely to have her family killed by hyper intelligent ants.
Ator: Most likely to invent the hang glider.
Flag On The Moon – Most Likely To Be Speculated On How It Got There.
Brought to you by The Committee To Mention Flag On The Moon Every Damn Week Here!
Joel Robinson, most likely to be shot up into space and force to watch bad movies.
Mike Nelson, most likely to succeed.
“Not pictured:
TERROR, C. [did not arrive in time for yearbook photo session]”
Arch Hall, jr. –
Arch was home schooled and voted by his dad to be “Most Likely NOT To Watch For Snakes”.
Leader of the Neptune Men:
Voted Most Likely to Lose His Record.
Everyone:
“Most likely to be a character in a bad movie.”
I got this:
Rowsdower, most like;y to join a cult
Rowesdower, most likely to wear acid washed denim.
Rowesdower, most likely to somewhat resemble ex-wrestler, Magnum PI
Rpwesdower, most likely to be friends with a Yosemite Sam sounding guy.
Gee, this is fun.
Rowesdower most likely to befriend a weird kid.
Rowedower, most likely to eat too want crullers at Horton’s and pass out.
Rowesdower, most likely to wonder if there is beer on the sun…
Mr. B Natural: Most likely to emerge from lockers and recruit people for band
Jane Coverly from “Teenage Crime Wave”: Most Likely To Accept Blind Dates That Will Send Her To Prison
Billy from “Laserblast”: Most Likely To Blow Up Cars After Finding Alien Stuff In The Desert
Wanda from “Alien From L.A.”: Squeakiest Voice and Best Makeover
You mean ex-wrestler Magnum TA, who did bear somewhat of a resemblance to Tom Selleck’s Magnum PI character.
Anyway,
TV’s Frank
Voted “Most Likely to Hired Away from Arby’s to Serve as Bumbling Assistant to Goofy Mad Scientist”.
Bob from “Jungle Goddess” was voted “Most Likely To Go On A Shooting Spree”.
Charlie, oops my bad. I meant Magnum TA.
By the way, I have two more:
Rowesdower, most likely to fall in a hole.
Rowesdower, most likely to get beaten up by his ex-cult comrads.
Iris from The Beatniks voted most likely to be told to shut up.
Bart Fargo — most likely to be called the wrong name for the rest of his life.
Paul Nelson — most likely to shoot his wife and deliver a ponderous speech about the folly of man.
Lt. Ray Makonnen from The Phantom Planet: most likely to, every year of his life, grow more and more convinced that the wisest and the best is to fix our attention on the good and the beautiful…
… if you just take the time to look at it.
On my screen I am showing no comments. Zero. It shows a page 1 and 2, but nothing else.
Neil Connery was voted most likely to live in his brother’s shadow.
Interestingly, Peter Graves, chief yearbook editor, was voted vastly superior to his overrated brother.
Space Teens just posted on the message board that he had found some high school yearbook photos of John “Torgo” Reynolds:
http://forrestcrow.proboards.com/thread/23397/pictures-john-reynolds-torgo-before
Mike, the father from “MANOS” THE HANDS OF FATE, voted as most punchable.
She was also voted Class Mary Edith Burrell* Lookalike.
*(Fridays cast member)
There were no comments.
…with apologies to goalieboy82.
The creature from “It Conquered the World” was described as “Most likely to have vegetable identity issues”.
Gloria: most likely to become a porn distributor and to shoot without looking.
Eric Vornoff: Most likely to tamper in God’s domain.
Lee Van Cleef: Most Likely to Learn Too Late that Man is a Feeling Creature…
off topic somewhat
look what finally come out:
http://www.chiefzabu.com
Rocky : Most likely to kill someone with a forklift
Manny, Commander Lindsey March (Both from Angels Revenge), Dr. Steve Carlson (This Island Earth): Most likely to get shipwrecked on a three hour tour.
Genius (Village of the Giants): Most likely to have some happy days and win an Oscar.
Sinbad…..voted most likely to not be Sinbad.
Katrina aka Creepy Girl was voted “Most Likely To Befriend A Fish”.
Melissa from “Touch of Satan” was voted “Best Fish Locater”.
Gumby’s dad was voted “Most Likely To Work Nude” and also “Best Internal Genitalia”.
Kenny was voted “Most Likely To Befriend A Murderous Turtle”.
Dr. Zorka was voted “Most Fortunate.”
The hitchhiker he picked up was voted “Most Likely To Simplify Everything.”
Torgo: Most likely to never find the right sized shoes
Lt. Witkowski was voted “Most Likely To Refuel”.
Jodie from “The Touch of Satan” voted most likely to marry the first girl he lays.
#89: Shouldn’t that be “most likely to TRY to kill someone with a forklift”?
Marv’s Dad from High School Big Shot: Most likely to commit suicide.
When I was in high school I remember thinking that this category would have gotten me an entry on the “most likely” page. I was a bit depressed.
Terry (Teenage Crime Wave) might have been listed as “Most Hygienically Challenged”…?