Short: (1950) A typical suburban family sits down for a rigidly formal and polite dinner.
Movie: (1952) America’s failure to accept “the universal draft” dooms the nation when the Russians invade.
First shown: 7/23/94
Opening: Mike tries to build a robot; it doesn’t go well
Intro: Dr. F. gives the bots a choice: him or a wire mother?
Host segment 1: A date with M&tB
Host segment 2: Tom tricks Crow into a Lois Lane discussion
Host segment 3: M&tB get a visit from “A. Bomb” on the Hexfield
End: Tom thinks it’s all a dream, Mike reads a letter, Frank is on patrol!
Stinger: Now that’s a walk-on!
(112 votes, average: 4.48 out of 5)
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• I wouldn’t say this is an episode where the short outshines the feature, but I think the two are about evenly matched. The short is an absolute classic but the riffing of the feature is just about as good. And most of the segments are a definite step up from last week’s drab entries.
• This episode is not yet released on commercial home video.
• Again, in the opening, they make very explicit that Mike is not Joel. I remember that killbot caused quite a stir on the MSTie internet. People were trying to make replicas within hours.
• Trace does a great job in the opening. I particularly love “Yat-dat-dada-dada-FACT!”
• This week the Umbilicus is the “Umbilcon” for whatever reason.
• Great little throwaway: As Tom is examining the “mother” we can hear him mutter “…usually have two…”
• The point of the movie seems to be a pitch for what is referred to as “the universal draft,” which apparently means that the military can just waltz into a tractor factory and demand that they build tanks. The goal, of course, is fighting Communism, under which the military can just walk into a tractor factory and demand that they build tanks. Maybe that’s why we didn’t hear too much about “the universal draft” after this.
• Segment 1 is great stuff, just the sort of segment I would include in a “shorts and the host segments they inspired” collection I would love to see Shout! Factory do.
• Annoying commercial: The Odor Eaters featuring “Swamp Foot.” Honorable mention: The “Real Bowl” Comedy Central bumpers, which were distinctly unfunny.
• “It’s a long par five to the nation’s capital” was later reused in MST3K: The Movie.
• I love the neon “stand by” sign in the TV studio. It’s elegant, I’ll grant you, but pretty useless.
• This movie must have been pretty easy to make–just edit together all the stock footage you can find, along with about 20 minutes of actual movie.
• Segment 2 comes before we’ve seen any of the Lois Lanes. It probably should have been segment 3. That aside, it’s lots of fun and has a very casual feel that I like.
• Then-current riff: “Vince Coleman’s final revenge.” Coleman was an outfielder, playing for the Mets in 1993, when he threw a lit firecracker into a crowd of fans in the Dodger Stadium parking lot, injuring three children, and deservedly got into a heap o’ trouble. Honorable mention: “This is all Andrew Guiliani’s fault.” Andrew was the mischievous son of then-New York Mayor Rudy Guiliani.
• That’s comedian and MST3K writer Mike Dodge as the Bomb. Dodge joined the writing staff at the beginning of season six, and this was his only on-screen appearance. Mike’s performance is a little over the top for my tastes, but he didn’t have a lot to work with. May he rest in peace.
• Incidentally, written on the side of the Bomb is “MJ-P” and “2-27.” Feb. 27 is Mary Jo’s birthday.
• One little thing I noticed this time: during the dogfight stock footage, Crow seems to completely blow a line. Very strange, but even stranger is that his mouth movements do not synch up with the flubbed line. Which means he ACTUALLY said something else! Did the Brains actually insert a mistake??
• Cast and crew roundup: Producer Albert Zugsmith also directed last week’s offering, “Girls Town,” and producer-scriptwriter-story writer Robert Smith (neither the guy from The Cure or the NFL star) worked on “Girls Town” as well. Cinematographer John Russell worked on “Girls Town” and “Indestructible Man. Special effects guy Jack Rabin worked on “Robot Monster,” “Rocketship X-M” and “Viking Women.” Makeup guy Harry Thomas also worked on “Mad Monster,” “Project Moon Base,” “The Unearthly,” “Bride of the Monster, “Racket Girls,” “High School Big Shot” and “Night of the Blood Beast.” Production manager Ralph E. Black was a 2nd unit director for “Space Travelers.” Art director James Sullivan also worked on “Attack of the the Eye Creatures” and of course Albert Glasser did the music for many many MST3K movies.
In front of the camera, Peggie Castle also appears in “The Beginning of the End.” Robert Bice also appears in “Teen-Age Crime Wave.” William Schallert (the man who was in everything) was also in “Gunslinger” and “Hangar 18.”
• CreditsWatch: Host segments by Kevin Murphy.
• Fave riff from the short: “The less said about this the better!” Honorable mention: “Brother has a tight psychological grip on Junior.”
• Fave riff from the movie: “Well, just keep coming down until you’re not in the sky anymore! Doncha know how to land???” Honorable mention: “So, are you gonna finish the windows?”
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The movie itself is ok but it’s outshone by the short, which is one of the best they’ve ever done on the show. So many great lines from this one which most of you already noted.
I think Invasion U.S.A. made for a good episode, even if it was grim and made large of stock footage, largely because the scaremongering is so over the top. The entire armed forces of the United States are reduced to a handful of soldiers, a couple dozen planes, and a few anti-aircraft guns. In most places, the first warning of an attack is when the Russians break down the door and murder everyone. (They may never say “Russian” in the movie but the soldiers are all toting PPSh machine guns.)
My favorite moment is toward the end, when it’s known that the Rooskies are advanced on Washington. “Double the guard around the Capitol!” someone says. Next scene we see that the doubled guard consists of…two soldiers. Well, better than one, I guess.
Overall Invasion U.S.A. is a lot more entertaining than many of the Season 6 movies. I’d definitely take this episode over The Dead Talk Back or Red Zone Cuba.
Short was awesome, but did anyone else notice that the cake they had for dessert looked really good. I kept thinking, “Man, if I could only go through the screen and get a slice of that! It looks delicious!”
This movie bored me on so many levels, I had to resort to my music playlist I had saved on my computer just so I could get through it.
Yep…the short is DEFINITIVE MST3K, but wow…Holy Crap, what a steaming turd of an excuse for a movie!
I’m surprised that it’s initial release didn’t spark a nationwide riot from moviegoers, if only based solely on the fact that a good two-thirds of it is nothing but stock footage from WWII…VERY loosely strung together. How infuriating to think of paying good money to sit through this (as stated earlier) “snuff” film in an actual movie theater. There’s nothing truly inspiring or patriotic anywhere to be found in the whole pretentious mess.
Despite a few sparse inspired moments of riffing, this movie annoys me more every time I happen to see it. As far as filmmaking goes, it’s just LAZY and gratuitous, and for some reason, it makes me kind of mad.
Did anyone else notice that Crow seemed to mess up on a riff during one of the dogfight scenes?
Fact about Dr. Clayton Forrester: In addition to my huge greatness, I’m quite a guy. Everybody likes me.
Now in fairness, do we know for sure that Joel was a successful bot builder in his first attempt? I think with a little more practice Mike could get better at it. Or maybe not.
So here we go again. In re-reading the comments from four years ago I can’t help but think this is Teenage Crime Wave all over again. Did that film spend way too much time in the farmhouse? Yes. Did this film use tons and tons of stock footage? Oh boy. But I’m not watching these movies. I’m watching MST. Did both of these episodes deliver on the riffs? For my subjective money: yes. I think they mined that stock footage and found plenty of gold. I love this episode.
I’m missing something here. Why is control group Frank dressed as a pincushion?
The date with your family host segment was great. There was some clever stuff in that script.
I’m not sure I understand the Lois Lane host segment. Did they really make Crow look all that stupid? I don’t think so. Then again I’ve been on the receiving end of that joke myself over the years.
In closing always remember: It was Dr. Clayton Forrester who won the World Series.
Favorite Riffs:
Short:
Narrator “But in the meantime he will relax at dinner with those he loves.” Crow “Not with these people.”
Husband and wife hold hands. Mike “Hi I’m Betty and I’ll be your wife tonight.”
Narrator “Father serves mother first, then daughter.” Mike “let’s go to the flowchart for this.”
Tom “and then a violent argument erupts over who had the most pleasant day.”
Movie:
Tom “This movie is like a good Danny Elfman tune.” Crow “You mean it doesn’t exist?”
Mike “Hey look. His helmet is ribbed for her pleasure.”
After a replay of airfield bombing stock footage, Tom “a bomb so nice they dropped it twice.”
Pilot “requesting landing instructions.” Tom “Well just keep coming down until you’re not in the sky anymore. Don’t cha know how to land?”
Newscaster “first invasion since the War of 1812.” Mike “When was that war?”
Mike “At least everyone who lived through the Blitz can feel good its been immortalized in this movie.”
Guard “Ever go see the Cubs play?” Tom as Russian in American disguise “Yeah they won… Oh damn no.”
Crow’s unearthly shriek when they try to separate him from his mother is just classic. I also love that Mike’s failed robot attempt only says “DE-STROY” over and over. Fun short and movie, as well, just not one I have memorized at all.
Dan–you’re not following Frank as the pincushion control because it’s an intentional non-sequitur. Or as the kids say: It’s so random!
@ #27: Correct, Harlow was the one who did the wire mom experiments. For that, he got featured on this list of real life mad scientists. Personally, I think Harlow was ranked too low. He’s way more disturbing than Giovanni Aldini, who was comparitively harmless (if overly macabre).
Good thing Crow didn’t say, “Are you my mommy?” Otherwise it would be real easy to retroactively think of the Doctor Who episode The Empty Child.
#9: Didn’t they have ANY personnel with brains or a decent response time?
Actually, the movie didn’t really say anything about the military one way or the other because…it was {almost} all a dream…
I wonder if, when the tractor guy got back to the office, he fired that window washer. Or at least tested him for an accent.
Is it just me, or does Father look a lot like Mitt Romney? :-/
So if you cut out the stock footage the movie wouldn’t be much longer than the short, but I still like it.
Do “Russians” really say “Bombs Away!” in English when they drop one? And nobody really seems all that worried about the radiation. Apparently A-bombs just make a bigger boom.
Not one I go to often, but I like it, and yeah, I thought it was going to be the Chuck Norris one when it was mentioned in TV Guide’s short-lived sci-fi column.
@49 (yeah, I know it’s a three-year old comment, bite me I need to rant)
Ah, the days when Real World was just an interesting experiment with a one-jerk-per-season limit that no one thought heralded a dark future where MTV played almost no music videos and no cartoons. I mean, come on, that’d never happen, just like MST would never end!
One of my top 5 shorts and one of my series favorite riffs which John in 18 alluded to.
“Dad, I’m dating a negro.”
I don’t know why but I bust a gut everytime I hear it.
this is why i as a rule don’t drink with fey east european hypnotists. one minute i’m knocking back a molson, discussing the necessity of PETA, the next minute i’m on a planet where apes evolved from man.
I was amused by the fact that the Brains identified the wrong actress as Phyllis Coates. She played the rancher’s wife. I guess they were confused by the fact that Coates was a blonde in this film.
I’m surprised no one mentioned the TV Guide flub until today. I remember reading that at the time and thinking it was odd for MST3K to do such a “recent” movie. Nowadays, I’d love for either team to do the Norris “Invasion U.S.A.” It’s definitely a riff-worthy flick.
A Date With Your Family
Best.
Short.
Ever.
“Mom, I’m pregnant”.
Funny short, but the first of many Season 6 boring, black and white, stock footage, narrated, hard to get through movies. These are the dark times…
There was a long period of time when I was puzzled by the A-Bomb fellow, wondering if I’d ever seen him before. Glad to find out now. I thought he was funny in his delivery! :)
Crow: “And never let anyone know the real you.” (was that how it went?) Geez, that line is actually pretty sad to me. But wow, they definitely did a masterful job on this short.
This is a hilarious episode, but I feel compelled to mention that the MST guys made a mistake about the Lois Lane actressess. Phyllis Coates is NOT in the airport with Noell Neil, She plays the Texan’s wife who drowns. Sorry MST.
A possibly unintentional joke in the short, when “Daughter” sits with “Mother”, Crow quips “Mom? I’m pregnant.”, and The Narrator says “Hmmm, is it THAT late?” Is the short riffing on Mike and the Bots?!
This is another great episode- works great as a companion to episode #205.
Oh god, the short! One of my All Time Favorites!!!
Some years ago, I attended an anniversary dinner for my grandparents. As soon as we all sat down at the table, I heard Crow’s voice in my head: “Dear Lord, take me now.”
I almost did myself an injury trying not to laugh.
“Brother runs a boy-cleaning service on the side!”
“Well, there it is. Spankings all around, then.” The short is just n minutes of brilliance, where n is the length of the short in minutes.
How do you top one of the finest pieces of eye candy ever to appear in a MSTed movie? Easy, you get another classic short, and a movie just begging to be ruthlessly mocked.
One of the newsreaders looked alot like Patty Duke’s dad-
He was a newspaper editor on that show-who knew he began
as a TV newsman in hallucinations shared by mid-town boozers.
I’ve noticed on a number of occasions that Crow’s line and the mouth movements don’t match (there’s even been times when his mouth moves but nobody’s saying anything–and it doesn’t seem like random movements). I’ve often wondered what was originally said, and if it also happened to Joel/Mike and Servo (whose mouths we can’t see in the theater). Something the network didn’t like? Something the writers wanted to change last minute?
I wish I was smart enough to jot those instances down when I see them, but I’m not. But I’m not crazy, right?
A Cautionary Tale. “A Date with Your Family,” that is, not “Invasion USA.” I was one of those that found DWYF to be mostly good advice, but easily lampooned. Should I or shouldn’t I wash my hands after handling a dead rodent, but before the main course or before dessert? I remember seeing sister actress in “Flying Leathernecks” with John Wayne; she played sister of ‘Space Children’ Dad; a bit part, but ruined the movie for me. I expected someone to tell her “sit and spin, you cruddy skank.” The short did have some levity; I’m dying to know what Junior was saying as he described the fight with punches, facial trauma and some form of impalement,if I’m not mistaken.
My complaint with the movie is not that the Russians won, but that the smug, self-righteous prig newsman didn’t get a more violent end. At least he tried to enlist. At the time some real communist drama was going on, depicted well on TV with Richard Carlson (from Tormented) in the show “I Led Three Lives.” This director, however, seems not to have done even an afternoon’s worth of research. The Russian soldiers are rock stupid (‘cub…small bear…sports team…?) yet can speak English perfectly and have perfectly replicated US uniforms and arms. The irony is that there were already several congressmen working for the reds at the time, so no need to invade.
I admit I had to watch the ending 3 or 4 times before I understood what it was supposed to mean. Much like Rocket Attack.
“A Date With Your Family”? Do you think the singer in the movie Birdemic got the idea for “hangin’ out, hangin’ out, hangin’ out with the family” from that short?
@50: IMDB credits Hugh Beaumont as narrator. (Given that IMDB is only slightly less user-editable as Wikipedia, the credit might be inspired by the ACEG.)
The short is really funny. The movie, not so much. Totally disagree with Sampo; this week’s Host Segments were a step DOWN from last week’s VERY GOOD (not drab!) Segments. Sure they occasional have a great one, but Mike-era’s strong suit was theater riffing, not the Host Segments, but I still have to factor them in when evaluating the episode, and this weeks do little for me.
The movie, INVASION USA, is a wet dream piece of propaganda for the Military Industrial Complex, so ridiculous though, the message essentially being, “hey let the govt. use and exploit you or some other nation will force you into being used and exploited!” *FACT: The US has increased Defense funding by more than double since the release of this movie in 1952. COINCIDENCE?!!!!? …..yeah, maybe….
RIFFS:
–
short:
Crow: “They’re high.”
Crow: “Brother runs a boy washing service on the side.”
Mike: “Brother has a tight psychological grip on Junior.”
Servo: “Dad, I’m dating a Negro.”
Servo: “This stinks!”
–
movie:
Crow: “Hey everybody, it’s a beautiful day…(bomb drops)…AHHHHHHHHH!”
Mike: “We’ve got to move this base, this keeps happening.”
Servo: “Hey you know what? They’re probably gonna bomb the Grateful Dead!”
ALL 3: “YEAH! WOOOO!” ———Ironically, there was a commercial break right after this riff, then (on my copy) a preview for next week’s episode, The Dead Talk Back, with Mike & Bots dressed as……THE GRATEFUL DEAD! Did they plan that or is that a helluva coincidence?
Crow: “They bomb our nations’s hobos.”
Servo: “Ironically he used to always leave his hat in cabs.”
–
Invasion, USA, not the Chuck Norris one,
3/5
I just wanted to mention I find it really weird how no one ever mentions this is the 100th official episode of the series, not counting KTMA. For other shows this is considered a milestone but for Mystery Science Theater 3000, it’s just another day at the office. The characters never mention it, the episode guide written by the writers and performers doesn’t mention it. Not even the fans. It’s just…odd.
(I got the line now as it was actually said)
Crow: And be sure no one knows the real you.
Mike says “Sylvia?” in a wimpy little voice as Junior is looking into the oven, is this some sort of joke in which poor Sylvia Plath puts her whole SELF in the oven? Dark.
Mike: Boy, when that doll wets….
Loved the commercial for this one. Mike and the bots are chowing down in the background while Tom acts all smug:
“Hello. Thomas Servo here on the Satellite of Love inviting you for a veritable banquet … where we will be enjoying a main course of ‘Invasion USA’ and a light tasty appetizer called ‘A Date With Your Family.’ Don’t mind my less-mannered pig friends back there. I will be here and we will delight you and intimidate you. … Join us. Pigs! ”
Classic.
Whenever this episode aired, I remembered TV Guide insisted on claiming it was the Chuck Norris movie. Every time.
The question is, which would be worse?
(Of course, there was that time when TV Guide said the MST episode “Outlaw” starred Jane Russell. )
I can’t watch that short too often. I get sick of the narrator lording it over me like, ‘don’t you dare free-think. You will enjoy conformity and holding yourself in check. DO IT!!’
I just don’t like some things that tell me what to do…which also explains why I really loathe ‘Invasion USA.’
Like the ‘un-biased newsman’ saying that we were at fault for not having a stronger Military force to protect ourselves.’ The way they portray our Army, it’s like we only have 2 dozen Military men to defend an entire nation.
Plus, hypnotism can cause someone to get that deep into a relationship?
I at least loved the scene where the un-specified ‘little man’ smacked around the smarmy tractor manufacturer for getting smart-mouthed. The smack and his wailing ‘SHUT UP!’ just can’t happen enough times for me.
Btw, is it me, or does the line, ‘Is, THIS your boyfriend?’ become one of Mike’s trademark lines? The ‘Is, THIS’ line I’ve heard several times later.
Also, didn’t like the smarminess of the hypnotist. And of course, the stupid ‘sheep’ in that bar give into his master plan, and then take that parlor trick as a scary ‘what if’ that they need to correct.
Watched this episode later than normal for the discussion as I broke my hand and had to do a bit of prep for when Sandy hit on Monday. Luckily, I’ve come through both ok and hope anyone else that was in the storm’s path came out unscathed as well.
I loved the short and liked the movie far more than I usually do a flick of this sort. The stretches of stock footage did seem endless, but the comedy brought on by the riffs and sheer stupidity of the movie made up for it. Not much else to say that hasn’t already been said so, 3 stars.
@Ford Perfect – I thought it was odd too, especially since they didn’t think they would make it so far. Usually TV shows are elated at 100 episodes because it is the “magic number” for selling the show into syndication (or at least it used to be, I don’t know if it is still that way). Since there was little to no chance of MST going into syndication or having enough episodes able to be aired for syndication, I can see why they thought it was no big deal.
I love this episode! Of course the short is brilliant, but I actually love the movie, too. I like it better than Rocket Attack USA. The latter seems like a much more competent product than this one, which is far more laughable. It also has a not-so-subtle tactic of scaring the crap out of the audience to achieve it’s ends, but backfires because they go so over the top it becomes fantasy. Blatant American propaganda is always funny to me. However, I do wish they would do the Chuck Norris movie of the same name.
A Date With Your Family, the Woody Allen Story.
I always thought they did this movie because they had done a cold war scare film with Joel (Rocket Attack USA), so, they felt they should do one with Mike.
Favorite riff: When the hypnotist finishes his brandy, “Hey, he swallowed the girl”.
Regarding the retooling of tractor factories so that they produce tanks, there was an instance during WWII where the New Zealand government produced a tank that used a tractor chassis. The Bob Semple tank was essentially designed by people who had no idea what they were doing. No blueprints of any sort were used, just a postcard with a picture of a tank. Sad really. Fortunately, they were never used in actual combat.
@ #11: Regarding Dan O’Herlihy, he probably wasn’t recognizable. The two films were made over thirty years apart.
@ #83 Jason: Just rechecked, and the entry has not changed.
The “mother” bot has always creeped me out. I’m not sure why – I can’t quite put my nipple, I mean finger, on it.
I like how the window washer makes a big anti-capitalist speech, even though he knows that the Russians are about to show up and capture and/or kill everybody that he is talking to. I guess the movie makers wanted to make sure we didn’t forget that the invaders were communists.
Having seen this movie since my last comment, I’d just like to complain about my biggest pet peeve–all the Commie soldiers wear US military uniforms and speak English, and this is portrayed as both the reason for their success and a dastardly tactic that Americans would never stoop to. My question: HOW DO THEY NOT ACCIDENTALLY SHOOT EACH OTHER AS SOON AS THEY GET SEPARATED? Seriously, militaries don’t adopt distinctive uniforms as some sort of sporting act of nobility and honor, they do it because in the chaos of a battle, you need some easy way to tell which guys to shoot at. Far from being a cunning ruse, this would be a self-evident disaster of friendly fire.
The Germans found some of their best English speakers, stuck them in US Army Uniforms, and let them cause a little havoc behind the lines at the start of the Battle of the Bulge. It is a tactic that has been used in reality. It may or may not violate the Laws of War, depending on what the troops in the false uniforms do. The leader of the German force was acquitted of violating the rules of war, as what his unit did was considered a legitimate act of sabotage.
LMAO at the window washing stooge hanging out with the commie big wigs and shot callers later on in the movie.
First, great short. The kind of short heaven made for Mst. The feature? Not so much, although like every ep, it had its moments. Just too dull for me. Overall? Not really one of my favorites.