Here’s my suggestion for a discussion topic: A handful of the experiments were TV show pilots. But what if… wait for it… they all were? What MST3K movie do you think would make the best TV show? What kind of show would it be? Live action or animated? What would you change about the movie to modify it for the serialized storytelling format?
I’m going to pick “The Slime People.” Every week Tom Gregory gets into a new scrape with the help of Prof. Galbraith and Tom’s girlfriend Lisa. Wacky complications ensue when Bonnie gets kidnapped every week and their wacky neighbor Norman “The Goat Man” Tolliver adds to the fun!
What’s your choice?
(Please keep those suggestions coming!)
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I would only watch a Manos series if Cinemax made it. The wives would get into nightgown wrestling matches that would turn less violent and more amorous. Synth music would kick in. And then Torgo (now played by John Stamos) would get thrown into the mix. Rowwwwrrrr!
@ ck #3: You seem to be confusing the Slime People with Attack of the the Eye Creatures.
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I’d like to see a weekly mystery series made of MONSTER A-GO-GO, in which the series finale would reveal that, there was no monster…
#52 I had similar thoughts, except in my version, it’s revealed there’s no monster at the end of every episode. So story starts over again every ep… :-)
BTW, has anyone mentioned “MST3K The Movie: The Series”? Because I think that would go over rather well…
I gotta say Mitchell would make a great cop show, ok maybe not great but definitely better than the 8 CSI shows we have now. Just think every week we get to watch Joe Don Baker chase done mobsters and drug cartels, visit them for dinner. every week he arrests Linda Evens for possession. Every week he aggravates the chief.
he needs a sidekick, maybe that kid he tells to buzz off, or I know that lady cop from Final justice, yeah thats it, it would be kinda like Final Justice and Mitchell in a blender, Linda Evens is his prostitute girlfriend, hes got the lady cop(I can’t remember her name) as his partner, car chases and helicopter rides, boat chases, all produced by Gradon Clark.
his catch phrase “Buzz Off Kid” or ” can I get a tall glass of milk?” yeah ide tune in friday nights on NBC for that.
Robot Monster: The little boy discusses with his therapist each week a different surreal post-apocalyptic dream with cyborg simians and his Mom as a recurring damsel in distress. The season ends with the kid being committed.
I’m the other person who wants Ring of Terror: the Series! I envision it as a half hour program with roughly 10 minutes each week devoted to the host looking for Puma.
Invasion USA: the Series! Having learned a valuable lesson through date-hypnosis, Vince & Carla travel coast to coast, teaching their fellow Americans to stop questioning the government and hate communism more (also, try date-hypnosis!). Villains would include trade unions and special guest star Edward G. Robinson.
Radar Secret Service: the Series! You WILL love radar! Submit yourselves to it!
Master Ninja: Wait! wait! Hear me out. Imagine if it starred Sho Kosugi as Okasa who is a vigilante assassin who came to America to pursue a fugitive from justice played by Lee Van Cleef (or someone else entirely).
He goes from town to town in a cool van with his pet cobra, where he romances a different lady each week, while uncovering evil plots. When the evil plot is uncovered he kills everyone involved, and thus has to always stay one step ahead of the law, while pursuing his brother who killed his wife and is now a crime lord. Oh wait, that’s East Meets Watts. Anyway, Max Keller gets his butt kicked in the pilot and is never heard from again. What do you think Sirs?
Might be unfair to list “Riding with Death,” as it actually was a pilot and ep, but I’d love to see the continuing adventures of slick Sam Casey and the down to earth Buffalo. Every commercial interlude would remind our heroes to give it the ol’ college try!
Riding With Death WAS a series called (I think) “The Gemini Man”. They used to show it on the sci-fi channel during the day. There were twelve episodes. No further information is available.
I think “East Meets Watts” would have made a FANTASTIC series with Stud and Larry (who could resist a show with lead characters named Stud and Larry?) fighting new crooked cops, drug lords and honkies each week and making sweet, sweet love to the ladies (because that’s what Stud would do. Larry would meditate but there would be a beautiful woman who wafts incense at him while he does it). Theme song by Journey.
‘The Sinister Urge’ would make a great series for Cinemax or HBO. A weekly delve into the seedy underworld of the smut picture racket. Its got sex, murder, porn, sex, sleaze and porn. Its tailor made for today’s audience.
I have several concepts in mind:
1.) A series based on the exploits of Dr. Balleau before the events in “Bloodlust!”. Each week, see the further corruption of Dr. Balleau, and see how he managed to ensnare more and more people into his world.
2.) “The Further Adventures of Captain Donelly and Lt. Gates”. Watch as our vaguely-comic relief detectives from “The Brute Man” wander their way through another case, trying to outwit their supervisors and put in the minimum effort needed, while the solutions to their cases basically fall into their laps.
3.) “Scalli!”. In each season of this series, Umberto Scalli (Of “Racket Girls” and other fine films) finds a new business to corrupt and serve as a front for more illicit deeds. Each season ends with Scalli’s world falling apart around him, and each season starts with him somehow managing to survive this and enter a new field.
The Creeping Terror. A new week,a new town, a new group of women in high heels(from the waist down)
Rocket Attack USA. Admittedly, it would have to be a miniseries.
“The Adventures of Big and Danny”
See Big Stupid once again save Danny from a heterosexual experience!
Thrill as Big nuzzles another naïve waitress!
Shiver as Jack Elam once again frames Big and Danny for a murder they didn’t commit!
Marvel as famous dancers from the past guest star as local truck drivers!
Laugh as hijinks ensue when Danny once again tries to find change for a fifty!
The Detroit Free Press calls it “The Love Boat on a train.”
USA Today says Jack Elam rivals Dr. Evil for sheer nefariousness!
Watch it Thursdays on FOX!
I think they could have gotten a season or two out of that there “Cosmic Princess”…
Honestly, though, “Humanoid Woman” has an excellent premise for a television series.
In Japan the criminal justice system is divided into two separate but equally important parts, Gamera who fights the monsters and the district attorneys which prosecute the monsters. These are their stories.
Hamlet
Agent from H.A.R.M.: The Series
Adam Chance goes on new missions to spy on and/or fight cold war remnants and he does it in his trademark smug-filled way. An ongoing subplot could be his boss’s attempt to become clean and sober. The pilot could involve a villain testing a deadly weapon in the form of rain that is turned purple by the toxic substance. Musicians should make guest appearances as villains. For example, Roland Gift played Xavier St. Cloud in the Highlander series, he should play a villain in this series.
#68 That should be Agent FOR H.A.R.M. The Series. FOR. IMDb says that it actually was intended as a tv pilot but they changed their minds. Close enough.
I know that ROCKY JONES was a series but I am suggesting a spin off series THE GAY NIGHT LIFE OF WINKY, its on LOGO! The first episode would be waiting for “Betty” at the Space Park.
Another I would pay to see would be THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF MANOS, THE HANDS OF FATE, on BRAVO.
Lots of fun suggestions, good topic.
Danger: Diabolik has a perfect set-up for an action series. It could adapt the Italian comic books that inspired the film.
Oh, and “Space Mutiny” already has a TV series. It’s called “Battlestar Galactica”.
“Might be unfair to list “Riding with Death,” as it actually was a pilot and ep”
The two episodes of “The Gemini Man” used in “Rising with Death” were not the pilot–though the backstory dream sequence scene with Richard Dysart as Leonard was.
How “King Dinosaur: The Series” Each week our brave male astronaut heroes save the female astronauts from various giant lizards, bats, snakes, squirrels, etc. each week on Planet Nova!
I for one would love to see the continued adventures of Big Stupid from Girl in Lover’s Lane. Each week, a new little town, a new Danny.
Let me concept this, sirs: “The Atomic Brain, The Series.” This would be the sequel to the movie, where Mrs. March, as Xerxes the cat, trails Nina to keep an eye on her money while looking for revenge. Nina is also pursued each week by another guest villain who is only after her money. Add in the cat’s convincing different mad scientists to try to kidnap Nina and transfer her brain for Nina’s. This is possible since the atomic blast at the end of the movie/pilot gave her telepathic powers to convey her thoughts I see many plot twists and in the end, no, I will not give the ending. You need to watch the whole series.
Sweet Peaches, the reality show. Follow Peaches and Joe from Racket Girls as they open a Curves franchise to help overweight people lose weight, like The Biggest Loser. Somehow Peaches always ends up with her shirt off as she works out, and Joe sexually harrasses her. Turtle Woman, Clara Mortensen (The Tough Old Broad) and Rita Martinez (Champion of Mexico) are personal trainers who help contestants lose the weight. Each week Monk the bookeeper announces who lost the most weight. The winner gets a fancy apartment and a contract to wrestle.
Watch the Adventures if Tang and Linda as they face prehistoric pratfalls while starting life on “The Blue Planet” (Sort of like “Land of the Lost”) in “Women of the Prehistoric Planet:The Series”.
Hercules and Agar! Agar agrees to go with Hercules (Hercules vs. the Moon Men) and they travel around to new adventures on that horse, “ow, “oh” “ow!” Every week they avoid aliens, child sacrfices, and helping guys in really short skirts not show their hineys! There’s Pizza Pizza around every corner, Deep Hurting to fight and the worst and never forget SANDSTORM SANDSTORM!
Akio and Tom the Legendary Journeys (Gamera vs.Guiron). Akio and Tom get themselves in trouble every week, needing Gamera to save them. Gamera falls into a depression needing therapy as he tires of these two boys who constantly need saving! Will Gamera free himself of their constant stupidity and let them die? Will Akio Cube it again? Will Tom ever get his hat back. Will Tomoko grow up to break up the Beatles? AND WHAT ABOUT CORNJOB??????
“Cheating: The Series”! Taking its structure from “The Killing”, we start the series with John cheating on a test. Then, over the course of the series, we watch the bodies pile up as Johnny tries to hide the fact…
Edwin B,
Haha! Exactly what I was thinking. Pod People – Monkees-style with the kids chasing around after Trumpy who becomes an Arnold the pig from Green Acres type of character. And at the end of each episode we get another unintelligible song/music video. D-list guest stars will abound as the gang travels around to gigs in their swingin’ RV. Just think what might happen when Trumpy meets the ‘I’m a virgin’ guy from the recording studio!
I’m calling TNT and USA right now.
Paintball: The Series
Betty and Jeanne,of Bloodlust, shocked by their (ex)boyfriends
1) having decided to become actors in Hollywood 2) having come
out of the closet,
Have started a profitable reality show based
on their experiences on the island. Dr. Albert Balleau, who it turns
out only experienced some flesh wounds “nothing serious” is a senior
consultant (turns out he was only kidding about whacking his ex and
her boyfriend-happy to get rid of her what with Betty and Veronica (I mean
Jeanne) on the rebound…
Complications ensue when Jondar opens a competing Paintball franchise.
Weekly competitions follow (leading to a season ending confrontation in
the Superbowl of Paintball competitions on the original island) with
Balleau taunting Jondar with “There can be only one!”
I propose a spin-off to GIRL IN GOLD BOOTS that’s all about the drunken dad from the beginning of the film– his downfall into an abusive alcoholic whose wife– (eventually daughter) run off on him.
Re 77: At first I thought you were proposing that Hercules team up with John Agar… Not a bad idea, actually
BOGGY CREEK: The Continuing
“Doc” and his class develop a Henry and Hendersons sort of relationship along the tributaries of Arkansas with Boggy and Bog Jr., protecting the creatures from hunters and b-list guest stars. Old Man Crenshaw would have his own theme played on every entrance, and the Christmas special would seem almost exactly like the Star Wars Christmas Special.
The Horrors of Party Beach: Every week the radioactive waste dumped off the shore of Party Beach creates a new horror that Hank has to fight, aided by the scientific insights of the professor and the common sense of Eulabelle. Each adventure will be complicated by the hjinks of the local motorcycle gang and feature a new musical number by the Del-Tones and the manly beach dancers. Hank’s girlfriend Elaine will continue to be badly dubbed.
Oh, and the solution to the problem is always sodium.
More suggestions to keep this thread going:
The Black Scorpions (adventure) They manage to tame one of the giant Scorpions, and give it to little Pepe as a pet. Every week Pepe gets into an annoying amount of trouble, and it’s up to his pet Scorpion to get him out.
Red Zone Cuba (comedy) The wackiest trio of convicts/US Soldiers ever get into one hairbrained moneymaking scheme after another. It’s up to sergeant Justine and Lieutenant Vivian to keep them in line.
Santa Claus (reality) 24 kids from around the world compete to get Santa’s undivided attention. Those that lose end up going with Pitch.
Beginning of the End (AMC series) After the events of the Lake Michigan Massacre, one giant locust survives, and is determined to bring Peter Graves to justice.
Final Justice (drama) Geronimo goes on special assignment to countries all over the world, runs roughshod over their local cops, and gets kicked out after accidentally solving the case.
Actually, “Rex Dart, Eskimo Spy” would make a great TV series!
The “Village of the Giants” kids – brainy little brother invents crazy things each week and older brother & his friends have to deal with them & clean up his mess.
I do want to see what happened to the Chevy dealership from Hired. Star salesman Jimmy became the owner, and he must teach the next generation of salesmen how to stay current. Problem is that Jimmy is stuck in the past. Week by week old Jimmy must learn about new things like the Internet, CarFax, and Auto Lenders. Later in the season, Mr. Warren’s son tries to buy out Jimmy so that he can control the Chevy dealership. What will happen in this new power struggle, and will the flying elves ever come back?
I would also like a series loosely based on Santa Claus Conquers the Martians where other (possibly) fictional characters help out Kimar, Droppo and the gang. The Easter Bunny, the tooth fairy and the lucky charms leprechaun can all take turns conquering said Martians.
Kei (84), I had a similar idea after you did. Boggy Creek Revisited: Tim, now 38, is Captain of a National Guard regiment bivouacing along the river. He flashbacks to his old college prof and the various braless research assistants as they stay at a new spot on the river each week, each with crappy stories of a near-miss with The Creature. Back in present time, the Little Creature has grown up and runs a local hotspot called “The Bottoms” where the crackers come to reminisce and tell tall tales about the old days w the creature, making vague threats to any city-folk; Doc Pierce is a regular, in fact, he’s now the town drunk and the butt of many cruel jokes.
Also, I agree Gunslinger would make a great series if we could find a Bev Garland to fight crime with a winchester. Every week she moves to a new town just before the railroad gets there, and everyone is slaughtered. She must move on, and her hilarious catch phrase “I’m never coming back to [insert town’s name] again” becomes a national phenomenon. She could ride slowly out of frame past the piles of bodies stacked like cordwood in what would evolve into the bloodiest show on TV.
Huntington Nights: A Twin Peaks-ish spinoff of Teenage Strangler. Every week Jimmy and his easily excitable girlfriend Betty delve into the seedy underbelly of early ’60’s Huntington, West Virginia solving crime. The series would also delve into the lives of the eccentric local residents: the short-tempered detective Lt. Anderson, Curly the leader of the local teen gang The Bulldogs, the Drew Carey lookalike owner of the local malt shop, and the aspiring Yipes Stripes singer Mary. Throughout the series, viewers will endlessly debate the central mystery of the show: If Mikey didn’t steal no bike, who did?
#89
Matt D
Turns out Jimmy calls up the Car Guys brothers on public radio. He gets some
good advice on salesmanship and car repairs after winning
solving the riddle of the week. But those wacky Boston car fixers
decide to retire from their business (this Fall) and arrange for
Bain Capital to take over Jimmy’s dealership, suck out the profits, and then
sell it cheaply to the Car Guys—thus setting them up in a new
reality show where they search for a manager by interviewing he/her
with towels over their heads and firing one each week.
What do you think sirs?
‘I Accuse my Parents: The next generation!’
set in the wild and crazy 1980’s, Jimmy Wilson Jr. continues the cycle by writing award winning term papers (which no one cares about because it’s the ’80’s), lying constantly about his parents and doing one stupid thing after another until he falls in with a group of Tiajuana bad arses who sell black market Commodore 64’s out of the back of their tricked out Chevy van. He ultimatly ends up a fugitive and gets taken down by ‘Fall Guy’ Lee Majors and special guest partner Richard Burton.
Pumaman would be a good series. Each episode, Pumaman could try to take on the bad guy, fail miserably and have his powers of playing dead save him. Then Vadinho saves the day again.
Squirm, the series. Each episode, Geri, Mick and Alma get into different situations while antiquing. In one episode, Geri and Mick’s budding relationship gets in trouble when Alma reveals her crush on him!
@67 Pond,
Hamlet: the Enduring Saga has real potential, if you can overcome the challenge of a weekly serial based on a Shakespeare tragedy where everyone dies. First episode: lights come up on a room full of corpses being carried out by royal attendants. But wait! no, they’re still dead.
Sandstorm: The Hurting Runs Deep. Each week the good old Greeks get caught in a horrible sandstorm and slowly fumble their way around for no real reason. In an age where TV is littered with reality shows so fake that anyone that believes in them surely has a vast mental problem that would drive any doctor that would dare threat them to suicide, slanted news that claims to be “fair and balanced”, and Lifetime original movies; the world needs a show that is 100% transparent in the fact that it hates, everything you hold dear, and hopes that you die alone in a ditch. Coming this fall of FOX: we destroy people’s lives for ratings.
What, no Alien from L.A.? Or did I miss it?
Kathy Ireland’s weekly adventures among the subterranean Australians from another world would be topical, entertaining, and informative.
Also, the success of Downton Abbey tells me that there is a viewing audience waiting anxiously for bold, uncompromising relationship drama like The Skydivers.
#96
“the world needs a show that is 100% transparent in the fact that it hates, everything you hold dear, and hopes that you die alone in a ditch.”
i thought that’s why we had MSNBC?
#88: “The ‘Village of the Giants’ kids – brainy little brother invents crazy things each week and older brother & his friends have to deal with them & clean up his mess.”
So, “Jimmy Neutron, the Live Action Series”?
CK at #92– I would buy season one of that show for sure.