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Weekend Discussion Thread: Worst Fight ScenesAlert reader Mike, aka “Rowsdower”, writes:
What immediately comes to mind is the “good-natured brawling” in “Hercules and the Captive Women.” Sheesh. What’s your pick? 112 Replies to “Weekend Discussion Thread: Worst Fight Scenes”Commenting at Satellite News
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It’s gotta be the rake duel from Hobgoblins. Gotta be.
I always laughed at how Arch Hall Jr couldn’t even make Richard Kiel flinch in Eegah, but one small rock not only drops him like a sack of potatoes buy bloodies him up as well! But the silliest fight is Batwoman & Co vs the multiple Rat-Finks. To this day it cracks me up every time I see it….
The raid on the porn studio in The Sinister Urge. The one guy took a dive without being touched.
I wouldn’t say it was the worst, but one of the silliest has got to be the nightgown wrestling by the Master’s “wives” in 424-Manos, the Hands of Fate.
Totally agree with #1, the rake fight scene was the most epicly awful fight scene ever in the history of the world.
How about any fight scene with Jonathan Haze in it? Pretty laughable in Viking Women and when he leaps from the bar in Gunslinger and Crow says, “I’m a Grimald (sp?) warrior!”, well that cracks me up everytime.
And then I should think that every fight scene that Gamera is in is quite goofy. Makes the Godzilla fighting seem well choreographed and planned thoroughly in comparison.
Here’s another vote for Nightgown Wrestling. However, I would like to add the battle royale in the climax of Santa Claus Conquers the Martians.
The totally laughable fistfight between Kimar and Voldar in Santa Claus Conquers the Martians would be my first choice. Choppy, unconvincing, and slow as molasses.
There’s also the nonsensical fight scene from The Creeping Terror. It comes out of nowhere and isn’t very good at all.
So many to choose from! One that comes to mind is the brawl in Laserblast: the participation of Eddie Deezen just makes it ridiculous.
One of the most nonsensical ones is in The Creeping Terror: the random fight that breaks out in the dance hall while the monster is eating people.
Antaeus vs. Ulysses
“I’ll show you what a boy can do”
“I can flyyyyy!”
The swordfight between Deathstalker and Troxartus was quite lame, leading to several great riffs:
Crow: “Ah, the harsh sound of cardboard against cardboard.”
Servo: “Yeah, it was a good idea to film the walk through.”
I’d go with Racket Girls, because most bad fight scenes had excuses. When you’re a professional wrestler fighting like that is what you do for a living.
The clumsiest, clunkiest fight (not only in an MST3K movie, but in the entire history of movie making) has got to be the title bout in “The Robot vs. the Aztec Mummy.” :reallypissed:
All the fight scenes in Werewolf were pretty bad! But the fight scene in Riding With Death (@ the bar) was ridiculously hallarious!
@ #11 — you are, in my opinion, correct.
“Are you even going to try to stab me?!”
“What, are you fighting Liberace?”
“It was a good idea to film the walkthrough.”
The beach fight between the ‘Bikers’ and the dancing men of Horror Beach.
Agree with the rake fright from Hobgoblins. Just pathetic in every way. Also thought of the disco fighting in Puma Man (though I kind of enjoy it. Take that members of Boston!). Finally in Red Zone Cuba I believe there is the neck breaking jump cut fight scene. Punch punch punch, then *boom* walking through New Mexico . .or Cuba, or who knows where and nothing happened. If only Johnny cared maybe all this unnecessary violence could have been avoided.
And from Invasion of the Neptune men, when the Neptunian’s B-squad couldn’t even defeat Space Chef aka. the wispy bachelor. Any resemblance between this and a real action scene is a damn shame.
The “battle” between Harry and Frankie in Skydivers comes to mind. Lots of air-punching in that scene. “I’ll break both your legs, Frankie, both of them.”
The fight scene from The Sinister Urge: “Well uh-huh…OK…you win…I’m in LOVE with you!”
Puma man fighting the members of Boston. What the heck was he doing flying around in the back ground anyway while Aztec man kept the foley guy busy??
Not sure, but I’d say that little “fight” between the Aztec mummy and the robot in Robot vs the Aztec Mummy was pretty cheap.
I’d like to mention the climax of Outlaw with its sand skewering stunt double. There’s also the faction rumble from Warrior of the Lost World, which sucked because of who ended up winning it.
Any fight scene with “Mitchell” trying to believably hoist his lumbering girth.
The epic battle between the wimpy Danny and the milquetoast thugs in Girl in Lovers Lane is so funny. Looks like Danny is just humping the guys leg.
The fight between Moon and Eddy at the end of Beatniks is also lame. Moon just seem to break down and sob even though he doesn’t get hit!
I’ve said this before in other discussions and I’ll say it again. The fight scene in Cave Dwellers where Ator is attacked by invisible creatures. He’s pretty much fighting himself in the scene.
The first that comes to mind is the bar brawl in Riding with Death. Jim Stafford’s how of triumph still fills me with angst.
This might not be a fight scene per se, but the floor waxer chase in Space Mutiny is even worse…
What about the empty cardboard box fight in Future Wax (I mean Future War)?
The “fight” between Beverly Garland and the three dancers in Gunslinger.
Other notables include:
any fight involving Max from “Master Ninja”
Commando Cody and Ted (sounds like a bad 70s show)
The fight between the spy and the Major in Project Moonbase (in slow motion, no less!)
Wow, there really are too many choices! So I’ll agree with Jamie, MSPh, AND klisch and vote for any fight scene involving “invisible” opponents (Riding with Death, Cave Dwellers). There’s something about the actors having to throw themselves to the ground, face a stationary gun, kill a cape dangling from a bit of fishing line, that is extremely funny and kind of sad all at once.
One of the worst fight scenes in an MST3K movie is the sword fight against invisible villains in Cave Dwellers. Really lame, but it generates two of my favorite jokes during the episode. Joel comments in an exasperated voice that they were too cheap to hire villains. After the fight ends and the heroes don’t take their cloaks back, Crow comments that they didn’t want them because they must have invisible blood on them. Hilarious!
How about Michael Landon’s opening fight scene in I Was a Teenage Werewolf?
Also, how about any of the fights in ‘Werewolf’? It wasn’t so much that they were bad, it’s just that they came from out of nowhere, were over almost nothing, and were provoked by an archaeologist who should have been a bit more professional!
The battle of the titans among the cardboard boxes in Future War is indeed terrible and laughable but the climactic fight scene tops it for stupidity simply because of that damn shirt getting “torn” off. And because it’s in the lamest set ever to be passed off as a church.
All the fights in Prince of Space are wretched but the silliest moment has to be the special effects failure where the Phantom screams, “Then I’ll strangle you!” and then what looks like a doll representing the Phantom is seen to move up the screen toward the Prince.
Another vote to the Sinister Urge rumble, however, as the dumbest. A lot of the other fights mentioned here at least sort of looked like they were trying but the Sinister Urge gives us “the raw power of a casual slap”.
So many bad ones. The top (bottom) could well be the thrilling
rake fight for the favor mof the frigid girlfriend. But pretty
dumb is Herc against the Moon Men—they crush the psycho queen
and then just patiently stand around until Herc gets around
to picking them up and tossing them. And of course any classic
Herc fights with soldiers, where they helpfully stand to each side of him
and toss themselves around as he flexs his pecs.
I think the following haven’t been mentioned:
The fight in “Horrors of Spider Island” inside the cabin
The forced perspective fights in “Future War” involving the pencil to the throat of a T-rex?
The Mexican Vampire Thugs of “Samson vs. The Vampire Women”
The fight in (and on the wing of) the plane in Time Chasers. “You wanna fly? LET’S FLY!”
Future War. Cardboard box fight between Runaway and Randy Johnson.
[Runaway prepares to deploy a spin kick] “I’m just gonna see where he’s gonna go with this…oh ok….well….ouch then.”
“The battle of the guys who peaked in high school.”
But yeah the rake fight in hobgoblins was pretty bad too.
“Oh did you see it, it just happended. The hose out-acted them.”
Any of the fight scenes from Angels Revenge. The sound effects make them particularly shameful.
Don’t mean to go off-topic here, but I saw THIS when I looked up Time Chasers. Can they possibly be serious? Is there a demand for that?
“They’re being defeated by a wispy bachelor.”- Invasion of the Neptune Men
Love the fights in “Girl in Gold Boots” just because of the character’s reactions when they are being hit.
I don’t know if this counts, but how about when Pixie “hits” (fans) the M.C. with a beer bottle in “Hobgoblins?”
As I’m reading the entries, my mind flashes to various episodes, and in every one there is probably at least one poorly done fight scenes- I’m looking forward to reading what other entries cite.
The one that came to me right away was “The Phantom Planet”:
First, the duel betwenn Chapman and Heron (“boy, you really have to cooperate to kill each other!”).
Second, the “climactic” fight with the elderly Solarite (“I have the element of surprise on you!”), and then the Solarite makes sure he gets centered on the linoleum tile of doom.
Wow- but Dolores Faith is still one of the most attractive actreaaes (in my opinion) in any MST3K episode.
Thanks for reading- see ya!
For me, it’s the sword-fighting “climax” of “Deathstalker and the Warriors from Hell”. It’s a prime example of why a film maker shooting a movie with fight scenes in it shouldn’t skimp on hiring a fight choreographer.
The fight between Nic and the “assistant janitor” in Time Chasers. The general goofiness of the fight and the unappealing lead… just a mess.
One cannot forget the deadly battle for dominance. Fighting with huge q-tips for the right to lose their accent over time.
And the is absolutely nothing wrong with eating potatoes.
The nightgown wrestling scene? I thought this was supposed to be about the worst fight scene!
This is a tough one, but the ones that stand out in my memory are the ones that are actually supposed to look totally badass– namely Ator and “Cabot!”– that rely on one cheesily executed stage move, over and over. That elbow to the sand, sheesh.
I guess I’ll stick with that for their egregiousness. Sad as the Racket Girls “action” is, it’s not as though the words phony and wrestling have never been in the same sentence before. And while the action in Angels’ Revenge only highlights how completely non-tough the actresses are, the movie is at least aware of its own shameless stupidity.
So yeah, I think it’s the self-serious approach that torpedoes our would-be action heroes, and Urbano takes the prize for his signature move and that ‘helping hand’ he gets from a stuntman. Sad.
Sir Knight and the jailer in 806 The Undead. They moved cardboard…errr…rock walls in that epic battle ;-)
The fight between the Warrior in Warrior of the Lost World and a circle of seven or eight other fighters…Right in the yin-yang!!
Angels’ Revenge, where the scantily-clad Angels battle the drug smugglers at the beach. I’m not sure the filmmakers bothered to edit anything out. And the needle drop Hanna Barbera sound effects do not help.