Topic suggestion: MST3K movies that would have provided a better story than the plot used by LOST, if filmed with the LOST budget and aired on ABC over six years.
I’m not a hater or a diehard fan of LOST, but something in between. I liked the first season but stopped watching it because of all the interminable flashbacks. This idea came to me after watching “Final Sacrifice” for the first time two weeks ago, and realizing the story was about equal to the plot of LOST, give or take one shirtless model-turned-actor (Sawyer). But with a somewhat lower budget…heh heh. As I told my wife, who is watching LOST to the end, “It’s just a Mystery Science movie, stretched out over six years!”
Well, naturally, the obvious choice is episode 1011- HORRORS OF SPIDER ISLAND, which I think IS the same story (which I guess would make Babs Jacob). But I’m going to go with episode 320- THE UNEARTHLY. Who knows? Maybe somebody at the Dharma Initiative was inserting glands in polar bears!
Have at it!
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First off, there ain’t anything better than Lost just as there ain’t anything worse than my grammar.
But for me, you could do a GREAT series out of Parts: The Clonus Horror. You start the pilot in the compound where the clones are kept in ideal circumstances unaware they are just spare parts for the rich and powerful, prior to “graduating” to America. The end of the pilot you see that “graduating” means being turned to fast food.
The first season is our hero and love interest suspecting that all is not as it seems. The finale sees them escape, and emerge into the “real world.”
There’s really a lot of places you could go with it, methinks.
I am recusing myself. Never watched Lost, never had any interest to. I’ve read The Invention of Morel so why bother.
LOST is literally the most trite and aimless show I have ever watched on television. I hate JJ Abrams with an unyielding passion and I refuse to watch Cloverfield or the Star Trek movie because of all the time I wasted watching LOST. (For the record, a few episodes into the third season is when I bailed.)
Anyways, I’ll vote Time Chasers. Didn’t Jack get his med degree from Castleton?
I think ‘Manos! The Hands of Fate’ would be perfect fodder for the following reasons;
-See mysterious Manos Manor that appears and disappears trapping unwary travelers.
-Thrill to law enforcements never ending search for drunk & horny teenagers.
-Scream as Torgo cleans the windows with his tongue.
-Dance with the many wives of the Master.
-Applaud for Manos! The Hands of Fate.
Imagine the flashbacks this series would have!?
Final Sacrifice would have had a fighting chance. If anyone could have gone toe-to-toe with the smoke monster, it was Rowsdower and his funk.
I am a big LOST fan, and have really enjoyed the characters’ stories and many of the plotlines and the resulting intellectual discussions about what it all means. However, I do think JJ Abrams and company made up too much of it along the way and would have been better served with a full (if somewhat sketchy) roadmap of where they intended to go before they ever started filming.
That having been said, Daniel beat me to it – the movie I thought of was Parts. You have a society of clones isolated from the rest of the world, trying to figure out WTH is going on. It realy could have worked as a Lost-type of series (although don’t get the director from The Island, the rip-off, er, I mean original movie similar to Parts).
I think Escape 2000 might also have worked as a Lost series – how did things get so bad in the first place, what goes on in the sideways universe of New Mexico (of course, we always ask that here), and Slash/Toblerone could be Jacob/MiB, Jake/Sawyer, or Locke/Ben (but not Jin/Sun – that would be too weird).
Overdrawn at the Memory Bank. Comparable for sheer incomprehensibility.
In order to reach the level incomprehensibility that Lost achieves, you’d need to combine two or more MSTed movies. I’d mix the “The Horrors of Spider Island” with “Devilfish” and add just a dash of “The Final Sacrifice”.
Sawyer could be the guy popping beers on the boat and listening to sonar.
Robot Monster had it all! Mysterious location seemingly cut off from the rest of the world. Sinister force pulling the strings who answered to another sinister force. Introspective pseudophilosophy from afforesaid sinister pulling the strings guy. Bodacious female type woman person. Bubbles. Yep, could have gone on for years. :roll:
I’ve seen every network episode of MST3K and a few KTMA shows, but I’ve never seen Lost even once.
The Coleman Francis movies have all the necessary materials. Certainly they all look like they all happen in the same location. There’s plenty of failed profundity. All that’s needed is to combine the three stories (such as they are) into one quivering mass–maybe work up to some grand revelation that Griffin is The Beast after he failed out of skydiving school and discovered that we’re all Cylons being manipulated by the Shadows and the Vorlons into murdering Laura Palmer. Just like all those grandiloquent TV “arcs” that always, always fail of their extravagant promises, it wouldn’t need to make any sense for the fans to lap it up.
I vote for Quest of the Delta Knights. Though I suppose with a budget in series format it would come across more as a medieval version of Kevin Sorbo’s hurcules. But who wouldn’t want to watch seasons full of Brigid Brannagh’s breasts being pushed up by midgets?
Killer Shrews. They are trapped on an island, instead of smoke monsters you have giant shrews, and lots of booze. Stretch that out with flashbacks of the lab scientists, imply that some shadowy organization is funding shrew research to conquer the world, and Captain Enos turns out to be the Devil in the end. Presto, it’s Lost! :smile:
The Killer Shrews – cut off from the world, trying to get back to civilization but with the entertainment value of dogs in wigs trying to look scary.
I have watched every episode of MST from K4 to 1013; every episode of Lost- what I have found (lost and found, aye) is- I prefer Old Man Crenshaw and Sam the Keeper to Lost bit players- the smoke monster has nothing on the master and torgo; the polar bear in SCCTM was better and the movie with better plot is Monster A Go-Go- after all, there were no monsters, like Lost.
#10 I’ve seen every network episode of MST3K and a few KTMA shows, but I’ve never seen Lost even once.
Me too. But I suppose “Bloodlust” could work. It even has an island!
Like Post #2 never saw Lost. I considered it but
as described the plot seemed to get less coherent,
but Killer Shrews might be interesting, especially if
Boss Hogg suddenly appeared in a helicopter. Oh wait,
maybe Sarah Palin could pop up in a helicopter and
shoot all the dogs—I mean, shrews. You betcha!
Hmmmm, I’ll think outside of the box and say “The Creeping Terror.” A mysterious, shape-shifting creature stalks the countryside while collecting data for an unknown agency. We start with a deputy and his new wife returning from the honeymoon who quickly get drawn into the mystery when the local sheriff is killed. Add in the government agent, and the discovery of a large metal capsule that seems to be the origin of the beast. Is it alien,the product of mad science, or something else? More and more characters are drawn in and killed off as the mystery unfolds. Add a few new wrinkles, up the budget a bit, and remember hit record the sound this time, and you could have a fun little series..
The foam peanutty goodness of the few eps of Lost that I watched from the first couple of seasons pretty much killed any interest I might have had in the show, so I can’t respond to the thread.
However, there’s one moment from Lost that sticks in my mind: Jack and Locke are yelling wildly at each other about pushing the button, or not pushing, or whatever. It was supposed to be very tense & dramatic…and all I could think of was the scene between Dr. F and Frank, from Teenage Caveman, when they end up yelling at each other about the invention exchange and sending J&tBs the movie. I doubt the creators of Lost were going for that comparison, but I could never think of the series without that in my mind.
The Deep 13 scene was far more compelling.
#12….mmmmmm, Brigid :grin:
Don’t you just love it when a pop culture phenomenon is brought up for conversation and a good percent of the people that respond have never seen it or only have a passing familiarity with it, but, OH!, don’t they just LOVE to tell you how they’ve never watched this show, how trite it is and how you’ve wasted your time watching it.
Yes, we all know that your tastes are superior because you don’t like something that’s popular. Go tell someone else.
Dark Grandma of Death (#19):
Now you’ve given me the horrible vision that someday, J.J. Abrams will produce and direct the big summer tentpole movie, “Mystery Science Theater 3000” (no subtitle), in which he rescues the franchise from all the nerds, geeks, and losers who watched it before by making it into “Star Wars” crossed with every big, dumb, loud action picture you’ve ever seen. It won’t have any movie riffing, because that’s for losers, but it will feature Crow and Gypsy making out. It will go on to make $300 million.
My choices:
-Time Chasers is a cute little movie. There, I said it. I could see it being a action-adventure type thing.
-Soultaker had an compelling idea for a plot that also posed some interesting questions. However, a lot of the “background” details needed work. (Like, the physics of souls, the whole concept of the afterlife, etc.) I would also ditch the icky subplot of Joe Estevez falling for Natalie.
-As mentioned above, Final Sacrifice. I’ll be honest, had I been a film professor reviewing my student’s senior projects, I would have given ol’ Tjardus an A-. (He would’ve gotten a full A if he had paid his cast!)
-Overdrawn at the Memory Bank is incomprehensible after Fingal’s body is lost. The movie only made sense to me after I read a summary of it online (because I’m cool like that). And even after reading, I still don’t get the scene near the end, where they’re standing in Rick’s place right before Fingal gets back into his own body.
However, the concept was interesting, and I could easily see that becoming some sort of science fiction television show.
-I already said this in the episode review, but I think “Blood Waters of Dr. Z” could be scary if the main character never changed into a fish at all, and it was just about a loner killing people. Much creepier and closer to real life.
-And while this may be cheating because it’s not about the plot, I could see Space Mutiny as a Michael Bay-esque, $150 million dollar production.
TarlCabot (#21):
Defensive much?
#24, maybe he is, and he might have a point. But I’ve never watched the show and don’t have an opinion about it specifically.
With all due respect to Sampo and his fine work, I think this was a particularly poor choice for Weekend Discussion.
Sorry.
Iggy (#24): No, but that particular internet phenomenon irks me.
Hmm, how about Parts: the Clonus Horror, that should be made into a TV show, or better yet a movie, er ah hmmm ya
Or Stranded In Space, which was a failed pilot. I think the underlying idea is pretty good (as is the case with several MST episodes, they are not as often a failure of plot but a failure of execution of that plot.)
I too am a Lost fan (I generally despise most of TV) What made me a fan was when listining to the Brisco County Jr. commentary track they started talking about Lost (I think they share a producer) and they said that ABC had asked them to keep extending the show, as it was making money, but the producers said “no, the show was written with a begining, middle, and an end and everything is going to tie together, we have a plan” That got me intersted as too many shows shy away from long story arcs. My time is limited and the idea that all hundred twenty somthing episopes connect is novel in todays TV world.
The new Star Trek sucked
Gosh, didn’t know how superior I was! I’ve never seen Lost, I just kept watching MST3k reruns.
I’d go with Lost Continent, seeing as Lost has a dinosaur (i think) or some kind of polar bear and Lost Continent has them as well. Both a little similar without the rock climbing.
When a TV series needs subtitles and a slew full of flashbacks to fill viewers in on the “plot”, it’s a mess for the casual fan. “Parts” and “Spider Island” are obvious choices for MST3K comparison but for me, “Women of the Prehistoric Planet” taken from the survivors of the crash view. Hi-KEEBA.
Now that ‘Lost’ is ending, will they have a spinoff called ‘Found’?
“…but the producers said ‘no, the show was written with a begining, middle, and an end and everything is going to tie together, we have a plan.'”
Remember X-Files? Remember how all the best episodes were the “monster of the week” ones and all the episodes furthering the big conspiracy plot were sort of lame? “Everything is going to tie together” might as well be spelled “ambitious but rubbish” in TV. I rather hope the fetish for imposing “arcs” on all of television comes to an end soon because it’s spoiled some otherwise decent shows, like “House”.
You can definitely put me in the “Never seen Lost” category. I don’t think there’s any plot from any MST3K experiment that would get me to watch it. It’s just a modern “Gilligan’s Island” with a supposed polar bear. Was the bear actually shown on camera? (I apologize for the really stupid question).
Did you think The Unearthly was over? No! Now that they’re in the house, they find they can never leave. Except the beef jerky-faced girl manages to find a way out using good posture. We learn the origins of the Neanderthal guys in the basement in the final season. And Lobo’s not dead. OR ISN’T HE?
I have enjoyed watching ‘Lost’ over the years even though it is hard to follow at times. For the people who hate it, I guess they’d prefer to have everything explained to them up front so they won’t be surprised or wonder whats going to happen next. MTV would be their ideal viewing.
As for my pick, it would be ‘Lost Continent’. Both it and ‘Lost’ have:
1. A mysterious island
2. An airplane brought down by electo-magnetic energy from the island.
3. A group of survivors armed with guns.
4. An attack by deadly smoke.
5. Strange monsters.
6. A metal hatch in the middle of the jungle.
7. Beloved characters get killed (okay, maybe not Monkeyboy.)
8. Lots of walking around. (There, even I have a complaint about ‘Lost’.)
I have NEVER seen an episode of Lost. Don’t know who the characters are. Couldn’t tell you the plot. I don’t even know the timeslot. SO I’M JUST GONNA SAY RANDOM EPISODES :mrgreen:
Mighty Jack
Gamera vs. Guiron
Squirm
Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
Danger! Death Ray
Jack Frost
Honorable Mention: Earth Vs. Soup ;-)
I’ve only seen the Lost Pilot (w/ Rifftrax of course). It was hilarious. I highly recommend it (link).
As for the topic, I vote for Time Chasers. Nothing can make your plot more convoluted than time travel.
Alien from LA.
Think about it… won’t you?
Girl wakes up in an environment that even uttering the word “Alien” will doom you to being locked up. You wonder if she is crazy or if there is “Surface World” or a “Malibu Beach.” You grow from there from clues. Meanwhile Tad and Rikov go over how to keep the crackpots from the corrupting their society.
At the end? The pop up and it becomes… Robot Holocaust.
Night of the Blood Beast. Just keeping all the different Steves straight could have filled a whole season. Not to mention the people turning into monsters, the scientists in labs, being cut off from civilization, etc.
And for my second suggestion, how about a TV show based upon a guy and his robot pals being forced to watch bad movies in a spaceship? If the spaceship had a smoke monster, I bet you could keep that going for a season or two.
What is Lost? And why should I care? :?:
#35 “Lots of walking around. (There, even I have a complaint about ‘Lost’.)”
Yeah, “jungle hiking” is Lost’s equivalent to “rock climbing.”
#37 “Nothing can make your plot more convoluted than time travel.”
And Lost did exactly that in Seasons 4 & 5 which is when a lot of people gave up on the show. We are still trying to sort out the effects of all that time jumping at the conclusion of Season 6.
Some good connections to MST episodes already named above, but I wanna mention two more recent alumni productions:
Rifftrax – Planet of the Dinosaurs: Castaways struggle to survive in hostile terrain, eventually building a settlement, choosing mates. Some die. Oh, and lots of old school “rock climbing.”
Cinematic Titanic – Danger on Tiki Island (DVD release in June): Shape-shifting island-bound monster takes human sacrifices. Tropical locations inflame passions. Bald weirdo whips midgets (I know, that hasn’t happened yet on Lost, but there’s still the finale…)
I vote for Manhunt in Space. Although they’d have to change the title…maybe name it after Rocky Jones and then they could…..wait a minute…never mind. :grin:
SANTA CLAUS. That would have been very interesting.
Future War: The Series!
It’s like a cross between Battle Star Galactica and Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles.
Oh yeah, and there are dinosaurs. Can’t forget those.
And since you’ve got the budget, convince the real Van Damme to star.
TarlCabot #26,
OK
Oops, I mean TarlCabot #21
I would go with The Crawling Eye. Replace the Island with the Alps in Switzerland and its the same. There’s the scientist and the psychic girl, etc.
Clonus would be great, too. But technically they tried that with a big budget and even called it The Island!
I’m not a medium, I’m a petite (#25):
Oh, I know he has a point. I wonder why people bother to post about how they have no answer to the question, or how they don’t care about the question, etc., etc. If they don’t have an answer and don’t care, it seems to me that the least they can do is to save their own time by passing it by. It’s just the absurdly hostile, contemptuous way TarlCabot puts it that’s so off-putting.
I’d rather read a hundred “I don’t watch ‘Lost,’ and I don’t care” messages than scan through one like TarlCabot’s, in which he shows how much he ostensibly hates negativity and pointlessness by ramping up on each without a crumb of irony. It’s like putting out the proverbial flaming sack of dog poopie with skunk juice. Is anyone better off for it?
By the way, I haven’t said now or previously what (or if) I think about “Lost,” because it doesn’t make any difference to how I feel about that kind of commentary. But maybe it’s just me that feels that way.
How about taking all the shorts, mix them up and put airplane sounds in between them.
@#44
Kyle, that sounds great!
But a few notes from the execs. Nothing to worry about. Just a few things they would like to see.
1) They are worried about the cost of setting things in the future. Big cost on sets and costumes. We need to lose that. Set in some time next Sunday AD. in LA if possible.
2) They are not so happy about the whole ‘War’ thing. Maybe just leave that out for now. That way we can market it to kids without the parents complaining. You should see the stuff the Toy dept. has set up for the show.
3) Replace the nun with a sexy, bikini-clad blond with huge knockers. Otherwise there is no chance in hell we will get the ratings.
Other than that they love the idea and want to start production in a week. Oh and Van Dame backed out so you will have to re-cast ASAP.
Thanks.