Movie: (1996) A man develops lycanthropy when he’s injured by werewolf bones unearthed at an archeological dig.
First shown: 4/18/98
Opening: Mike thinks he’s James Lipton
Intro: After being de-Liptonized, Mike attempts to escape down a ladder to Earth, only to arrive at Castle Forrester
Host segment 1: Mike and Tom present who would be in their werewolf movie, but Crow isn’t as good at it
Host segment 2: M&TB sing “Where, o, werewolf”
Host segment 3: Mike has become a werecrow!
End: Mike is still Crow, Tom has become Mike; in Castle Forrester, Bobo ruins Pearl’s attempt to create a werewolf
Stinger: “This is absolutely fascinating!”
(391 votes, average: 4.75 out of 5)
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• Bill’s take is here.
• Now THIS…this is MST3K at its best. I would stack this episode up against any other one from any era. Even if you’re a total Sci-Fi-era naysayer, you’ve still got to love this one. The riffing is brilliant, the segments (well, most of them) are fantastic and the movie is, oh, so very ripe for riffing. It’s just great in every way. Did I mention how much I like this episode?
• References.
• Obscure reference not in above: King Timahoe, Richard Nixon’s dog.
• I think I told this story once before, but it needs to be told here. Sci-Fi Channel threw a little wingding in New York City just before this season started, to drum up some publicity. They invited all the major TV press people and most of them came (including my pal and former mentor David Bianculli). In front of a packed amphitheater were Mike and Kevin and I can’t quite remember who else. I don’t think Bill was there and I don’t recall Jim being there, but I could be wrong on both counts.
In any case, in the audience was none other than James Lipton. I suspect he had been put up to it, but during the press conference, he rose and attempted to ask Mike some of the Bernard Pivot/Marcel Proust questions he famously asks his guests on “Inside the Actor’s Studio.”
Now, I can’t say for sure what was going on with Mike, but I strongly suspect he was having one of his famous headaches. I’ve been around him when he’s had one, and in general he is, at best, quiet and cool, and at worst surprisingly short-tempered. I think that explains what happened. The other explanation would be that Mike simply has no use for James Lipton, especially at an event where the purpose was to focus media attention on his TV show, and not Mr. Lipton’s.
Anyway, Lipton asked Mike: “What is your favorite curse word?” and Mike, slowly and with a pained expression his face, replied something to the effect of “I would have to say that it’s: ‘Go to hell, Mr. Lipton.'” Lipton didn’t attempt to ask him any more questions.
• This was the episode Sci-Fi Channel submitted for Emmy consideration. It was not nominated.
• Host segment 1 is one of those “bit about not quite being able to manage to do a bit” bits. They’re a bit wry for my taste.
• The song in segment 2 became an instant classic.
• M&tB are still wearing their girl group hair as they return to the theater.
• Segment 3 is a gem featuring the instantly beloved line: “Well, your voice is going to change inexplicably every seven years…”
• Mike is still a werecrow when he returns to the theater
• At the end of the movie, just when you think they can’t possibly top what they’ve done so far, we get the brilliant closing credits song, in which they chime in with an eclectic mix of songs that they think fit the song’s rhythm. Don’t recognize them all? They’re all identified here and here.
• Ya know, considering that Kevin is the most musically experienced of the three riffers, it’s kind of surprising that Servo messes up the tempo a couple times during the song.
• Of course, the cocker spaniel seen in the final segment was Kevin’s beloved Humphrey. Humphrey lived a long and happy life and has, um, “gone to live on a farm upstate.”
• Cast and crew roundup: Joe Estevez was also in “Soultaker.” That’s it.
• CreditsWatch: Directed by Kevin. Intern Dan Breyer took a one-episode break after this show, then returned for three more episodes. That’s Beez as the peasant.
• Fave riff: “Okay, stop. Everyone go up a shirt size.” Honorable mention: “I’m still in this movie, ya know! You might not think I am, but I am!”
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This is absolutely fascinating! Right?…
there’s so much to say about this movie but all that comes to mind is “What we’re doin’ here Bob, is we’re gettin’ killed by a werewolf.”
Sampo, you spelled the title wrong: it’s Wurlwilf.
I’ve been reading some reviews of del Toro’s The Wolf Man that suggest it may be a good movie to riff on.
Unfortunately, once the public catches a whiff of this over-cooked big-budget stinkburger, we can probably forget about “An American Werewolf in Traffic” being green-lighted.
Those caribou don’t stand a chance now that I’m driving!
Well. I give it 5 tusks but only 3 stars ( sorry ).
I had some time on my hands this week so I watched this one a lot. Unfortunately I am not as big a fan of the later subject film episodes as I could be. There is brilliant riffing but I think it’s kind of patchy. Some of the gags are brilliant, some are kinda lame. Host segments are a mix of the sublime and the… meh.
The movie is of course so hideously bad. The epitome of its incompetence is the scene where Paul / Wolf / Gorilla / Bat / Bear is chasing the make-out teenager, starting with her shrieking and leaving the jeep till when she gets… killed ( I guess ? ).
Interesting that this a completely police free town. A healthy number of assaults and deaths and it doesn’t seem to bother the authorities one bit.
Unusual format for the episode. We spend almost no time at the castle, only the breakfast at the beginning and the puppy peasant hybrid at the end. Which leaves lots of room for doings on the SOL:
The James Lipton bit is brilliant.
The escape ladder bit leaves me cold, but the quick “time permitting” from Mike to the bots gets a yay from me.
Famous brothers acting is another non-starter for me, except for Crow’s punt and apology at the end, which was very good. Maybe the whole bit should be taken as a satire of an old Joel bit. I dunno. But Chip Hitler was very funny.
The girl group ( Myke and the Robettes ? ) is SO good… wort cost of admission by itself… take the Hiawatha exit….
Werecrow also leaves me cold, except for Mike’s imitation of Crow’s voice. And of course don’t say essence !
Pearl and Observer going off to play while Bobo nuzzles the photo op dog is very sweet.
Favorite riff
What’s the subject matter ? You’re right the subject doesn’t matter.
Honorable mentions.
Jump rope call over opening credits and singing over closing credits. Stuff like this really kills me, and you can never have too many Tusk references for my taste.
Thanks for turning off the bad soundtrack
Maynard G Krebbs (obscure even then ? )
Chubby Ramone
It’s Don Imus ! ( especially now, 15 years later, have you SEEN Imus ?!?! )
Operatic singing when the werewolf skull is intercut.
Writer of the Purple Sage
The various Country Western / Country Rock music riffs. Can’t be wrong.
Geronimo / Leif Erikson
Skinwalker, potsticker, clamdigger
Crying Indian / litter on the highways jokes
Dictator for life, Santa !
Observations / Questions about the movie
Poor Joe Estevez.
So Paul’s Mom owned this estate ( it has a groundskeeper ) that he apparently has never been to and now mom is gone and he inherits, and the… realtor ? has a some kind of budget to fix the place, but only the attic, but there is money to pay the groundskeeper ? I actually kind of like that house.
The pool playing scene was really just all about Natalie’s gazonga’s right ? Was I missing something ?
I was going to say that Sam the Keeper was the best character then I realized that Chubby Ramone the pool playing biker was the best character, and CLEARLY the best actor. Nice work.
When exactly did Natalie get werewolfized ? was it sex with Paul ? Was there a scene that was cut ? what did I miss ?
What’s up with Crow’s pronunciation of Port ‘OW’ Prince ? Is that just a mistake or is there a joke I’m not getting ?
TUSK !
What is with the villain’s hair in this movie?
The security guard/werewolf is the movie’s director, right? When he is in his car….”Hello,Dolly. This is Louis, Dolly” had me on the floor. Oh, gosh, there is just so much to say about this movie. So much love. I’m just going to sit back and enjoy. And maybe “I’ll walk over to KIRK DOUGLAS’S HOUSE” later. Can I give it more than 5 stars? “No, no, the mood is over” “And what a mood it was!!” “Vanessa Redgrave for Banana Republic”. I love this one.
So really, what happened to Joe Estevez in this movie? He helps kill the bear/dog/ cat puppet thing, then poof! he’s outta there! did he storm off the set when he found out he wasn’t the main character’s love interest? did someone pull up to the set one day and yell “Yo Estevez! Soultaker!” did the wanna be director one day decide that he had the wrong Estevez? did he get promoted to catering? What?!Please in the name of all that is good and beautiful in the world please tell me!?!
Werewolf 2, starring Brad Pitt’s brother Stinky.
Archaeological diggers really need to get a good union
with strong grievance procedures, or at least Blue Cross
bennies equal to that apparently available to
Wisconsin cheese coop temps.
And which had a more shocking ending, that of Werewolf
or Space Mutiny? :shock:
#6 I’m not a medium, I’m a petite – I believe Crow is trying to say “Port-au-Prince”, the capital of Haiti. Love Chubby Ramone also. I believe he was also a part of the crew on the movie – the makeup, or something? But golly, with all that love, only 3 stars??
pearliemae #12. Oh Yes, I know he is trying to reference the capital of Haiti, I just couldn’t understand the bizarre pronuncaition. I’ll give them a lot of credit, like maybe there’s a joke within the joke, but I don’t see it. I suppose it could just be a mistake. But they are a pretty bright bunch.
Normally I don’t like taking up a lot of room with my opinion but I love this episode so much I think I’ll do a full on breakdown of the segments.
Intro: Pure awesome, Crow’s actual concern for Mike’s mental health quickly changing to irritation is priceless. Plus the sound of Crow rattling just adds to his frustration. Unintentional I’m sure, but a great add none the less.
Opening: First Mike blaming the bots for his being dressed as James Lipton is fantastic, the further dialogue adds to the baby sitter feeling between Mike & the bots. The dry, non-reaction by Pearl, Brain Guy, and Bobo is perfect for people just not ready to deal with the situation yet, as is the final moment of Bobo trying to steal Pearl’s box of cereal.
Segment 1: I like how caught off guard Mike is when Crow asks that he goes first. And how can someone not laugh at Chip Hittler?
Segment 2: Clever song that leads to the fun revelation that there’s a strange story about a guy named Steve.
Segment 3: Kudos to the oversized net for the Werecrow effect. And as Sampo mentioned, “Your voice is going to change inexplicably every seven years or so,” pure gold.
Segment 4: Tom with hair is funny but this whole segment is stolen by the events at the castle. Bobo again means well but fails miserably. And because of this whenever my dogs start licking my face I start calling them wolves and accusing them of trying to eat me.
The movie is slightly less silly than Pumaman but just as ridiculous which again provides for constantly fantastic riffing.
I love the sheer insanity of Yuri. The whole scene where he beats up… I mean fights Paul is hysterical. Natalie (Side note: Adrianna Miles? Yeah I’d tap that like a keg) clearly states that they have clearance from Noel (their boss!) for Paul to be there, yet Yuri still spazzes out about it. Seriously, how is this guy not in prison? He’s clearly in his 40’s so I’m willing to bet he has a huge police record composed 90% of aggravated assault charges.
The jokes about Joe Estevez not being in the movie are a level of obscure brilliance that never ceases to amaze me.
Does anyone know what they meant by the riff, “Time to do a Jenny Garth”? I was a big fan of her as a teenager (and now in my 30’s I can safely say she has aged incredibly well) and have no idea what it’s about.
I think I noticed more director/cinematography/post production riffs here than in any other movie. Such as, “Man they’re establishing the hell out of this building,” “So they just put suspected werewolves in the neo-natal unit,” and “Somebody’s helping her scream.” Oh and of course that incredibly bizarre soundtrack (that happens to use parts of the movie’s soundtrack) Paul is listening to.
Fav Riffs (just like Pumaman, there are WAY too many):
Tom: I see some really stupid children being born as a result of these two meeting.
Mike: Hey everyone, free samples of me. (I have dropped this a few times at parties)
Paul: So tell me have you made any history shattering discoveries lately. (there is a horribly inappropriate and poorly delivered chuckle in the middle of this line, too)
Tom: I barely know what a hat is.
Natalie: Well maybe then it’s too late.
Mike: Wow, the future conditional pluperfect subjunctive. (having taken MANY language courses in college I get a huge kick out of this one)
And nothing will top the songs they sing over the closing credits, which makes me laugh whenever I hear even a part of any of the songs they touch upon. And yes I do have the entire string memorized.
Colo-Pri #14: I think that’s a Jenny GARP reference, as in World According to Garp. Garp’s mother ( a nurse ) impregantes herself with a dying / comatose soldier (?) thus becoming pregant with her son. or something like that.
I love this episode. If there was a Hall of Fame for MST, this would be a member. “People say ‘rack’ to me a lot.” Gotta admit, during that pool hall scene, I wasn’t lookin’ at the table……
#15 – Now that makes complete sense. I figured I was hearing the name wrong. I’ve never seen the World According to Garp.
Thank you.
17,15,14. Jenny Garp aka Jenny Fields is a low-frequency stock riff for them. Expect it when you have an unconscious, bound or otherwise immobile male with an unrestricted female nearby. Goes back at least to Manos ( I think, I need to check ).
I haven’t read the book or seen the movie either :D
“Paul, you is a wurlwof!”
Judging by the quantity and length of some of the posts already, this is a popular one, as it should be!
Also, how refreshing that we have a good old-fashioned song for one of the host segments. Hilarious!!
Let’s take a poll: Natalie. Hot or not?
I say, HOT!!!!
I forgot to mention, about Natalie being hot, yes, we all know about her obvious assets (dramatic pause while I’m somewhere else… I’m back) but does she have it above the shoulders, too? Personally, I’ve always been crazy for red-hair.
Oh, this is a regular in the rotation. I loved it on VHS, I love it on DVD. Thanks, Shout Factory!
“Yes, because the real danger is from the non-werewolves outside.”
“Speaking of deep cuts, does this scene really need to be in this movie?”
“Wow, it’s the actual skeleton of a pushme-pullyou!”
“This is the Mir of archaeological digs.”
“Hey, Paul, you’re really turning into a werewolf over there! Anyway, three-ball in the side pocket…”
“Great. A random citizen that can kick a werewolf’s ass.”
“…and she’s a werewolf. Ok, movie, she’s a werewolf, I think we’re all ahead of you, here…”
One of the best Warvolf flicks ever!
“Where-oh-werewolf, I’ve looked everywhere, wolf”.
For me this is the best episode of Season Nine and ranks amongst the very best in the show’s history. This film brought out the best of the Brains. The riffing is sharp and hilarious and the host segments were fantastic, the best being the girl group musical number. I agree with Sampo, this episode matches up well with any of the best from other eras of the show.
“Werewelf?”
“Surprise ending conceived by a tubeworm”
“Where oh where is my werewolf?”
Five out of five.
“The Bulgarian women’s choir version of “Jingle Bells”.
I’m surprised that no one pointed out the movie did actually have a “star,” if only a B-list one: Richard “Grandma!” Lynch. He appeared in several movies, including “God Told Me To,” one of Andy Kaufman’s first films.
And here’s some more about Fountain O’Hair. Caution: Some of you may need eye bleach after seeing it. Or not.
Terrific episode. The movie is as incompetently made as any ever featured on MST and it features several unforgettable performances: most notably, the bad guy (and his ever-changing hair) and the “wurhwilf” lady. And the riffing is hilarious throughout. Overall, I also enjoyed the host segments. The werewolf song is terrific…one of the best skits in the Sci Fi era and I enjoy the James Lipton piece. Also, there’s not a lot of Pearl and when she is in it, she’s not hamming it up as objectionably as usual.
Overall, a MST3K classic.
So that’s how the show got cancelled. You never mess with Lipton.
Actually both females in the movie are pretty hot. Pool shark Lithuania Chests is quite a dish that’s true, but I think the Pantsless Wonder has a lot going for her as well ( and might have a better face ).
Just imagine putting Natalie and Tommy Wiseau in a room together.
So is it spelled “Warwilf”, “Wurwelf”, or “Worwulf”? That has always confused me…. :roll:
Lordy lordy. Indeed one of the series’ best episodes ever.
I love Bobo’s indignation in the final skit. “Oh, like it’s real hard to get a peasant around here!” It’s a side of him we haven’t seen in a while, and doesn’t come up anywhere as often as it should… just enough pride and smarts to add a special edge to his type of extreme stupidity.
I’m not sure what else to ADD to all this, really, that hasn’t been mentioned already. The only host segment that doesn’t really “fire” is the “brother” one, but “Chip Hitler” (hee hee) and Mike’s acting make it work well enough. It does feel like a riff on one of those older, more talky Joel-era skits, doesn’t it?
I know this is horrible to think about, but can you imagine Paul and Natalie’s sex-talk?
“hnumblemumblehnuh”
“PUHL. YOO IS SO BIK.”
“muhnuhrumbuddlenuff”
“PUHHHHHL.”
“Yeah, I’ll take a WALK (to Kirk Douglases house).” I was shocked that Yuri was NOT a whirlwulf. The way he chewed up every scene he was in and ever changing big disco hairdo and no doubt slept nose to anus he should have been one. I enjoyed the labor relations meeting in the beginning whereby Yuri’s shades kept appearing and disappearing during the fight. Top five for me.
He’s killing her with butterfly kisses!
“The very model of a man-made werewolf” – Mike
Wow, what a strange coincidence that we discuss this on the eve of a new “Wolfman” movie release (looking forward to it myself). This episode is legendary – one in which Mike & the Bots strap the saddle on tight and ride the movie into oblivion. But after numerous viewings, I’d like to say a couple of GOOD things about the source movie here.
• The soundtrack is effective. For instance, the authentic-sounding Indian chanting featured on the Rhino DVD menu is hypnotic. And the creepy stuff is suitably scary.
• They transplant the European traditions of the werewolf mythos into the Native American story pretty well. The plot starts with an intriguing premise, but then whizzes it down the hind-quarters once we realize this particular wolf-man isn’t going to do much very interesting besides mud-wrestling with a woman and NOT mauling Jerry Garcia.
• As far as performances go, our lead Paul (Federico “Fred” Cavalli) was pretty good. He appeared to be in real anguish … to be in this film. Put this in the “Innocent man transformed into a monster by scientific greed” category.
• Best of Season 9, so far. 5 stars.
Paul – You’re a hustler.
Servo, as Natalie – No, I was IN Hustler.
This is one of my all-time favorite MST3K episodes. Definitely in my top 5 list. I love every minute of it!
#34
The DVD is from Shout! (20th Anniversary set), not Rhino.
And multiple Native American cultures have many of there own versions of werewolf mythologies, it is not exclusively an European idea. Unless you’re suggesting the mix of the introduction of the Native American story (magic) but then having the werewolf be more of the European quality (more infection like).
I love the scenes toward the end of the movie where everyone’s accents just get out of control.
“Have you noticed that my accent has grown as bad as yours?”
“You and Noel is in it for fame and fortune? But over my dead body!” (“You is a jerk!”)
Re: Sleeping nose-to-anus…
How is that possible? I mean, I’ve seen some people do some… ahem, impressive contortionist feats in my time, but they weren’t trying to sleep while performing them. (Shortly after, perhaps.)
As far as sleeping curled up is concerned, what we’re looking at here is mostly the fetal position, which is hardly unusual. Sleeping “nose to anus” isn’t a “trait”, it’s a friggin’ deformity involving fewer ribs and internal organs. The human body just ain’t built to bend that much for that long. I can’t fathom how anyone could even sleep nose-to-crotch, never mind the anus (here comes the Sex Pistols).
Er… I can’t fathom how anyone could sleep nose-to-their-own-crotch, I mean.
#38. Let’s introduce you to Ron Jeremy :twisted:
Superb episode. Host segments are a lot of fun, just great. The movie, what can be said? Just great, glorious in its inexplicability. The ladies are special highlights to me.
And #30, you’re not alone in your confusion. I won’t even begin to guess how to spell that.
Like most here this is 5 stars all the way for me.
I was never crazy about the first host segment,but I watched this episode again a few days ago and thought it was pretty good. Kevin must have been the model for the Greg Pasteur drawing.
Whatever happened to No Pants Lady? She falls down the stairs and disappears from the movie. I guess they cut that scene out.
This is the second episode where they mention irritable bowel syndrome. On purpose?
The groundskeeper looks like the old guy in Soudgarden’s Black Hole Sun music video.
Hilarious episode. Another home run from season 9.
One of the more incompetent films MST3K riffed. Actors with indeterminate foreign accents. Hair styles changing in between scenes. Honking directors. A moon that is always full no matter what day it is. Women that scream with multiple voices at all at the same time. Bird-dog-something-werewolves. Joe Estevez cameos.
Sam the Keeper seemed to be a character made specifically for showing up in a host segment, but they left him in the film.
Tony Zarindast, the honking security guard and director of the movie, is one of the more overlooked bad directors of MST3K.
Great riffing going on here. Once again the movie sets up the jokes and Mike and the bots deliver them where they needed to go.
Host segments? Eh. They’re okay. I really only found Mike as a werecrow to be really funny. Although all the guys in drag is always funny as well.
Not sure if Mike was kidding or not to James Lipton at that Sci-Fi event. It does seem fairly strong worded for Mr. Nelson.
Since I went to college in Flagstaff this was always a favorite. 5 out of 5!
I love this episode. I’m sad see Humphrey in no longer around.He was also in mst3k book. But man wood acting, killing security guard by turning into werewolf all great. But who had worst depiction of security guard this movie or Hobgolbins?
#42 – Sam the Keeper WAS the old guy in the Black Hole Sun video, according to IMDB, anyway…
5 Stars!
This is a long time favorite of mine, which also continues to support my theory that newer bad movies are just funnier.
Host segments: Most are great, except for the second one about the lesser known brothers of famous people. Mike and the ‘Bots deliberately play it as an awkward/weak sketch, but it doesn’t make it any better.
Mike is the BEST James Lipton ever. Eat it Will Ferrell.
The song “Where Oh Werewolf” is great and well done by Mike and the ‘Bots.
The Werecrow segment was a good acknowledgment of the change in Crow’s voice. Mike looks creepy as Crow. I’d hate to find out where Servo got the “essence” of Mike. :shock:
The movie:
Classic awfulness. There was one easy fix for this movie and it’s this: remove the shots of the full moon. It was never established that the full moon had anything to do with the yanaglache (sp?), so why show it? That Yuri, I guess we can assume he was originally from Cuba, was a nut. He starts punching guys that are digging up the werewolf, motivated by the fear that they would damage the find. He later uses the skull of the find of the century to attack Paul. He’s such an awful character.
I like Richard “Grandma!” Lynch. He really does look someone’s grandmother when he’s wearing that sweater. (On a side note, he was the Russian villain in the movie “Invasion U.S.A.” starring Chuck Norris. A movie of the same name was used on MST3K.)
The inconsistent werewolf design really hurts this movie. Tony Zarindast should have at least given up on using a full fur costume for some of the werewolf shots. It clearly doesn’t work and the werewolf does end up looking like a bear.
Fave riffs:
“He’s Winnie the Pooh.”
“A Rent-A-Center Andy Garcia.”
“Well, they’d better have another one of these jackets at Chess King.” (There used to be one in the mall I go to so I always appreciated that riff.)
As I recall, one of the scenes that MST cut from this movie involves crazy Yuri sneaking into the hospital. He goes up to the nurse’s station and asks which room Warwilf #1 is in. He then smiles and compliments her on her hair. (Perhaps he wanted to borrow it later?)
If they ever put together an ultimate “best of” set for MST3K, this one definitely belongs there. Kevin was quite correct when he wrote that, for BBI, the movie was “a gift from God”.
One good think about the movie, though: the original VHS release had a really cool-looking morph effect on the cover. And Natalie is very attractive, even if she is move vacuous than Bertie Wooster.
Who fronts Zarindast the money for these turkeys? Did they ever read the script or visit the set?
I’m sure he thought he couldn’t make a bad movie with Joe (400 movies a year) Estevez and up and coming talent like Arizona born-and-bred Federico Cavalli and Adrianna(is it cold in here?)Miles.
It’s obvious he had Richard Lynch (who is a very good actor, by the way) for maybe a day, because it sounded like he had just read his lines before each take, and the rest of the All-American team were there because they weren’t in SAG and he could pay them less than scale. I have a feeling the word “Union” wasn’t spoken on this set much.
I liked the werewolf skeleton though.
“Hey Geron-eeee-moe, I’m talkin’ to you!”
What was Yuri’s, er, business plan at the end anyway? It seems like turning your hated rival for the fair maiden’s hand into a snarling monster, then trying to catch him all by yourself at night, maybe isn’t the best plan in the world to capture yourself a wurwilf.
I also love how he tells Natalie that he’s waiting for Paul to “return to his lair.” He’s been a wehrwulf for, what, a day or two? Do people who have been freshly and unknowingly converted into whirwelfs already have lairs picked out?
The song medley at the end is the perfect way to spoof the movie’s pretentious, “primal” musical score. I guess they figured that if they troweled on the drums and the chants and added a few random cello riffs for artsy effect, they’d have the perfect atmosphere for a serious horror movie.