This week: Worst performance by an actress in a leading role.
My nomination: Kathrine Victor, star of “Wild Wild World of Batwoman.” Clunky and unconvincing from start to finish.
Who’s your pick?
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Weekend Discussion Thread: Worst PerformancesWith the Oscars this weekend, I thought we’d follow up on the recent “worst movie” discussion with some “worst performance” picks.
158 Replies to “Weekend Discussion Thread: Worst Performances”Commenting at Satellite News
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OK, first question: is Mr. B Natural eligible?
As I looked through the episode list, there aren’t a whole lot of good leading ladies to choose from. And the ones who are, it’s more a case of a bad role than a bad actress. I mean, what do you do when handed the part of Jan in the Pan?
So I’m going with Paige Sullivan, Amy from Hobgoblins. The reserved girl who comes out of her shell is cliche, but you can work with it. Unfortunately, Sullivan isn’t at all attractive when she does turn into the slutty girl, and that, as in Manos, was the only point of the movie.
I’m going to have to go with the leading lady from “Werewolf” … or should I say “Wuurwilf” :)
I must nominate Miss Deep Cover from Rocket Attack USA. “Could you say that line a little more ‘woodenly’,” says Crow, oh so appropriately. Producers girlfriend, exec’s daughter…the only possible explanation for allowing this young woman to continue in the role after they discovered her mind numbingly atonal acting.
Cisse Cameron from Space Mutiny gets my vote. So bad an actress that the Volume 4 DVD cover listed her actual name as “Lea Jansen.”
Kathy from “Track of the Moonbeast.”
“Moon rock. Oh, wow.”
And when she parks the car and screams. And all the other times when her voice and facial expressions were completely inappropriate for the scene.
How ’bout the girl with the egg-sack on her head from “Attack of the The Eye Creatures”? She’s pretty awful.
I’m already mulling over The Maid From The “Radar Secret Service” as my Worst Supporting Actress…
I’ll agree with Jane Dobson and go with the actress that played Natalie in “Warwulf”, though I’d make it a tie with the actress who played Valeria in “Robot Holocaust”. Both imbue their respective roles with an almost Bertie Wooster-level of vacuousness.
“Yew and yor dawta aw doomed.”
The Girl in Gold Boots, Joanie “I had a pretty mind!” Nichols.
Marilyn Manning who played Roxy Miller in “Eegah!” Simply dreadful.
Nice legs, though! :wink:
KW- that is Valaria played by Angelika Jager in Robot Holocaust- oh- the room of questions- her acting was so horrible it was delicious.
How about the first girl to be killed off
in “Pod People”? The RV camping trip party crasher.
Everybody: “Idiot control now!”
Hmmm…..I’m gonna have to go with the woman who replaced Reb Brown’s voice when he screamed in Space Mutiny.
Tony Cardoza is the worst actor in the history of film. He looks sullen and sounds bored in every flipping scene, no matter what the circumstances. I know M&tB made fun of Kathy Ireland’s “dull surprise,” but Cardoza’s performances make her look like a screen idol.
I hate Tony Cardoza, is all’s I’m saying.
I’m gonna nominate Jean Fontaine from The Sinister Urge.
“No. That’s not Dirk, Nah-ah!”
SORRY everyone. I messed up. Thought it was “actors” Male or female.
I guess I’ll go with Kathy Ireland, then.
Special Mention: Alice Lyon, who played Elaine Gavin the 35-year old teenager in “The Horror of Party Beach.” She apparently was so bad that another actress had to dub ALL her lines!
Two performances from Red Zone Cuba:
Cherokee Jack…and the guy they threw down the well.
Oh and the Wuuuurwolf lady was pretty atrocious.
“I’m Cherokee Jack”
A slight cheat but the witch woman in Troll 2 may be worse than all of the bad actors and actresses who ever appeared in MST3K.
Michelle in “Girl in Gold Boots”
Natalie in “Wurwelf”
The ladies of “Angel’s Revenge”–a 7-way tie
Sister Ann in “Future War”
Ann-Margaret in “Kitten With a Whip”
Mamie Van Doren in “Girls Town”
The Paper Chase guy in Warrior of the Lost World. What was his name again? Ahh, no matter.
Natalie from “Werewolf” is my runner up, but the winner is whoever plays the leader of the all women gang in “Robot Holocaust”. That is probably the most poorly acted movie they have ever done, but she manages to out terrible the rest of them.
My vote is for R.A. Dow as Roger Grimes(“You’re gonna be the wormface!”). Honorable mention goes to Walter George Alton as Tony Farms, aka Puma Man. God, he was painful.
I’m gonna have to throw in for Beth from Skydivers. Nothing about her performance worked. Stilted performance, blank stares, and an ill-fitting jumpsuit. Heck, even her hair seemed to want to escape. Just awful.
I’d have to agree with the all the ladies of Angels Revenge, they were just terrible. Also, maybe not the worst but fairly bad as is usually the case in MST3K, the fortune teller in TISCWSLABM-UZ, “You feelthy peeg!”
I have to add my voice to the Natalie from “Warwilf” chorus. It’s like she learned her lines phonetically from someone who didn’t speak English either.
The mom from “Manos” was pretty bad, but there were extenuating circumstances there. Betty from “Teenagers From Outer Space” is simultaneously awful and still one of the best actors in the movie.
After careful consideration, I have to agree with Sampo and give the worst performance award to Kathrine Victor, The Batwoman.
I would have to sit down and really give this one some heavy thought as there are legion bad acting actresses all through the catalog of MST3k Films.
I don’t have much time so I’ll just go with what comes to me first.
My first thought is the lead girl in The Puma Man. Her over the top performance and camera hogging made me annoyed everytime a scene came up with her. The girl in Track of the Moon Beast was pretty bad too.
The entire cast of “Angel’s Revenge” but especially the perky school teacher who couldn’t act her way out of a paper bag.
Natalie from Werewolf might have done a better acting job if she SPOKE ENGLISH.
The blind girl from “Red Zone Cuba”. All she had to do was sit there and act blind. How do you screw that up? And yet she did.
The girl from “What to do on a date”. She was so wooden that when they were decorating people hung streamers on her. THANK YOU!
I nominate Bonnie Pritchard from Time Chasers. The acting is always sub par when hire your friends and local community theater hacks. Even her wardrobe was horrible.
Tom Servo: “Two different Plaids? I’m a naked robot and even I know better than that.”
Natalie from “Warwilf”. She was fasinating – NOT! Stiff as a 2 x4. Come on, even the cry baby gun nut in the film out acted her.
Steve Vil already said this, but I’m inclined to agree: any of the Angels in ‘Angels Revenge’. Whenever I hear any of them speak, I can’t help but flinch.
The actresses in The Atomic Brain were all atrocious! Their accents were all horrible and their characters were wooden and painful to watch. Lisa Lang as “Anita Gonzalez” was particularly bad. Also, should we count dubbed actresses? They might have actually been more convincing in their original language although the expressions and gestures may be bad.
Emby Mellay from “Touch of Satan.” This is where the fish lives??? – wonder if the fish wouldn’t mind having a bad actress for a roommate.
1. Adrianna Miles, Werewolf
2. Donna Leigh Drake, Track of the Moon Beast
3. Marilyn Manning, Eegah
4. Alice Lyon, Horror of Party Beach
5. Kathy Ireland, Alien from L.A.
And the winner is…
Donna Leigh Drake.
“Moon rocks?! Oh, wow!”
While Natalie in Werewolf is horrible, she at least has a language barrier to help defend her.
Kathy from Track of the Moonbeast however… I listen to episodes of MST3K at work daily and just listening to her “acting” is like nails on a chalkboard.
1. The big woman that played Neptunes wife in the sinbad movie.
2.The skinny euro-penish blond in Devilfish.
3. Adrianna Miles, Werewolf (eventhough she was real easy on the eyes in the pool playing scene..”People say RACK~EM to me a alot”
5. The hysterical girlfreind in “Teenage Strangler” ,No not Mikey.
My first thought was Emby Mellay from “Touch of Satan” But I also loathed everything about Kathy Ireland’s “performance” in Alien from L.A. and “Creepy Girl” from “Catalina Caper” was also quite inept so I guess I’ll call it a 3 way tie.
Does Mike in drag count? :lol: If not how about Vi from tormented? ” Tom Stewart killed me!”
I’m going with Ann Sweeny. Dr. Ted Nelson’s wife Judy in “The Incredible Melting Man”. Not because she’s THAT bad an actress (she ain’t that good either in all fairness) but because she also played the woman with whom BJ Hunnicut cheated on his wife with on M*A*S*H. Even before I ever laid eyes on her in the MST3K episode, I thought she was WAY too ugly to lure ANY man to cheating on his wife, let alone someone who turned the opportunity down so often!
MIKE-“I had my breasts lowered and my hips pulled out at odd angles, I hope that’s OK.”
CROW-“Her area dominates her front side.”
BTW: Quote:#4 – Garza says: Cisse Cameron from Space Mutiny gets my vote. So bad an actress that the Volume 4 DVD cover listed her actual name as “Lea Jansen.”
I don’t own Vol.4 so I didn’t know that. Man, that’s too funny!
Sampo and #26: I find Victor the most tolerable part of “Batwoman,” and not just because of that outfit. She’s sort of the blessedly calm center amongst the annoyingly forced wackiness.
I just saw “Alien from L.A.” again, and I have to say, Kathy “Dull Surprise” Ireland is pretty far front in my mind right now when I think of bad actresses. But I’m sure there are bunches of others I’m blocking out.
Has to be Angelika Jager in Robto Holocaust. But she is so hot I don’t care :)
Honorable mention to the wife in Manos, and all the Angels in Angels Revenge. Best lines: ‘Oh, little Trish’ and when they buy the van from Pat Buttram: ‘How about the 88 cents’
Loretta King, who played Janet Lawson in Bride of the Monster. She was pretty awful…her performance hurt quite a lot.
Also have to mention the “My god, what is it?” woman from Creeping Terror; her performance provided an excellent stinger.
# 19
Ann-Margaret in “Kitten With a Whip”
Mamie Van Doren in “Girls Town”
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Hey, who cares if they can act! :mrgreen:
I wish I could pick someone that hasn’t already been said, but it is definitely Natalie from “Werewolf.”
“You and Noel is in it together?…but over my dead body…”
Was going to jump in with Warrwelf girl like everyone else, but then somebody mentioned Kathy Ireland. Now I’m torn.
I gotta agree with many of the folks here who have loudly condemned the woman (I refuse to call her an actress) who played Natalie in Werewolf. She was just so oddly wooden and lifeless. I wonder if many, many pounds of drugs were perhaps involved?
Also, Glen’s fiance Carol from Amazing Colossal Man wasn’t the worst actress, but her voice was so annoyingly shrill, I wanted to reach through the screen and throttle her.
Anthony “Tony” Cardoza in ANYTHING.
“I’m realy gung-ho on that idea.”
Ack!
Okay, I screwed up. Ignore my previous post. The actress named Kevin in Sky Divers. “I like coffee!”
Tony Cardoza, definitely
I’m not sure if she is really considered a lead role, but I’m thinking of the girl in Pod People who spent the entire film complaining about how men don’t find her attractive and yet trying to be snarky and aloof about it.
She seemed to have much more screen time than she deserved, even by the film’s standards. Also, I might really be nominating whoever dubbed her voice, if in fact it was, as her voice was what made her especially annoying to me. “Molly, are you hiding a MAN in this house?”
And let’s not forget, she was HALF A BEAT LATE!