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Weekend Discussion Thread: What If You Were Indestructible?Our pal Timmy sez:
I think I’d go to the woods and taunt a bear. It’d be fun! You? 60 Replies to “Weekend Discussion Thread: What If You Were Indestructible?”Commenting at Satellite News
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I’d have people try to kill me with a forklift!
I’d hop into a Zoo exhibit with a giant ball of yarn and play with the lions and tigers, just to freak folks out. ^^
I would masturbate with a cheese grater, preferably a salad shooter
I would have dinner at Chipotles.
Easy: I’d steal a beer from Mitchell. You don’t get between a Mitchell and his Schlitz.
go to a packers game and yell ‘packers suck!’
walk into the dressing rooms at a ‘victoria secrets’ store
go shopping at wal mart at 4am on ‘black friday.’
walk into the locker room at a UFC show and tell them they all look kinda gay.
I’d go find out if there’s beer on the sun.
I would travel to the Middle East to frustrate ISIS. It would drive them insane that they couldn’t behead me.
Wreak terrible vengeance upon the world. Chaos would follow upon my every footstep. The blood of the guilty would run like rivers across the land. All would tremble in fear befo…. uh… heh.. no, no I wouldn’t do anything like that! Not at all…. I’d.. go pet.. sharks. Yeah, that’s the ticket…
I would get Joel, Mike, Trace, Kevin, Frank, Mary Jo, and of course, Ol’ Pitch himself, Paul together and suggest starting all over again with MST3K Version II. Now talk about a life threatening experience, but it would be worth it!
I’d make fun of Eegah’s petrified family. “Hey Eegah! How come you didn’t have a daddy, just two mummies!” If the taunting didn’t enrage him, the bad pun most certainly would.
Of course, being indestructible isn’t necessarily the same thing as feeling no pain. Maybe I should think this through.
I’d track down the tractor factory spy from Invasion U.S.A. and force him to finish cleaning those windows; Soviet army or no Soviet army.
Go for midnight strolls throughout Washington, D.C. and beat up drug dealers, pimps, gang members, and stupid politicians.
I’d walk up to that Teenager from Outer Space, Thor, ignore his taunts of “TORCHAAA!!,” take away his ray gun, and slap the **** out of him. (Gee, and I’m usually so peaceful.)
If I was indestructible I’d want to decide who lives and who dies.
Frustrate the living hell out of vaccinators and phlebotomists.
Cup of coffee. Some skydiving. Pour a little acid on my ‘chute.
Get a job with Union Pacific. Be happy about the birth of my child. Be happy for upcoming retirement.
don’t forget to kiss Helen on the side.
I would hang out and make the Master disapprove, constantly. What are you gonna do about it, Hands Man?
Well, I’d be able to drive on snow and/or ice-covered roads without fear. I have a real hang-up about that.
Or, going to back to a Rifftrax suggestion, I’d go to ComicCon wearing a T-shirt that reads, “You know, “Firefly” really wasn’t that good.”
I’d cover myself with “The Smell of Fear” and then walk into a field full of Killer Bee hives.
I would methodically go around the U.S. of A. and take all of the firearms and explosives and destroy them all? What about the 2nd Amendment of our Constitution? I personally repeal it, for all the people who have died under the gun, and will never get to exercise any of their rights, FOREVER!
Drive into a brick wall at 120 mph
Dive into the Grand Canyon
Oh wait! I know! I would stand in front of an interocitor and yell, ” Hey, Big Foreheads. Metaluna stinks! Your girlfriends like Scrotor better than you. Ha!”.
I’d start wandering into nuclear test sites so I could be indestructible, amazing, and colossal.
Then, if I had time, I’d work on getting myself projected.
I’d vacation at Area 51 and take lots of pictures.
Also, I WOULDN’T look before crossing railroads.
I’ve got to go with snowdog in post #11. Just being indestructible doesn’t mean that much, especially if you’re an unathletic wimp. Fat lot of good indestructibility will do you as you get put in a double jock lock and hung from a flagpole. So think your actions through first.
i would juggle live hand grenade blindfolded and would have had a lot of beer beforehand.
There are also other concerns. Is your sole power indestructability? Do you still need to eat, sleep, go to the bathroom, etc? Are you immortal?
A big problem would be even if you couldn’t get hurt, you could still be locked up somewhere…
I would pet the llama. Then give matches to Mikey.
I’d ride the crawling eye up and down the mountain!
I would dress up in a pig costume, travel to the middle east and battle ISIS armed with a spork, bazooka, and package of bacon all while singing “living in America” by James Brown. Then when I’m done it’s back to the states for Ice Cream & coffee while I use a iron foundry tank of liquid metal as a hot tube.
Go big or go home right?
That would be tempting Fate.
I would lay down at the bottom of the pond for hours and hours just to see if the fish really did live there
Oh, I dunno. Maybe jaywalk on a moderately busy street. Eat an undercooked chicken breast. Sit too close to the tv with no lights on. It’s the little things that make indestructability fun.
I’d dress up as a bear and go taunt Vladimir Putin. Tell him he’s no Ilja Muromets — he’s not even a not-Sinbad ; )
I’d track down Courtney Love and tell her what I think of her. Something no one should consider doing unless they are indestructible.
I’d have a Thanksgiving meal at Pearl Forrester’s house.
i’d go to Vermont, beat up a certain wimpy professor and steal his time traveling Cessna. go back in time to ’41, walk up to Hitler and kick him in his goosestepping ‘nards.
I’d be the scariest clown in the circus!
If I were indestructible, your weapons would be useless against me!
I don’t need indestructibility to frustrate phlebotomists. My veins are like Weeping Angels. They move when you aren’t looking at them. Two techs and a nurse learning blood draws had their attempts with me just last Friday.
I’m moderately diabetic (hence the blood labs) and not looking forward to the stronger management options that might come my way. I’d settle for perfect and continued health over outright indestructibility.
i’m sure it’s been done, but since the dreaded Star Wars movie is opening in about a month, we should do a WDT of which MST-ied characters would you have in your SW movie?
I’d be down by the waterfront dressed in a Spartan costume.
Find Dick Cheney and curb-stomp him.
I’d confiscate the world’s supply of potatoes and shut off all the power and…
Oh, I’m no good at this.
You took the words right out of my mouth!
wow…so you become indestructible and you’re first thought is to beat on an old man with a heart condition? why not warm up by beating the crap out of your old man and/or grandfather?