This week’s thread about non-sensical lines got me thinking about things that made the movies MST did truly cringeworthy (as opposed to being arduous because they were boring). Even things that get riffed can penetrate and affect the viewer, causing there to be some basis for Dr. F’s experiment to work. The hurtful way that horrid kid in Hobgoblins pretends to be a rock star in the opening minutes does it to me.
I’ve still got to go with the peeper privates in “Attack of the the Eye Creatures.”
Keep those suggestions coming!
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John Agar. ‘Mole People.’
Wisconsin crackers-‘Giant Spider Invasion.’
The failed attempts to make any of the wrestlers from ‘Racket Girls’ sexy.
i have to go heave now.
Jim Backus’s performance in Angel’s Revenge makes me shudder to this day. I feel so sad that he had to resort to THAT to get a paycheck….
Buffalo shot in Devil Fish.
In early episodes, the “Please don’t smoke.” comments were made at the expense of Yul Brenner I believe. He was in some of the first anti smoking TV ads when he was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. I would like to be wrong about this but I don’t think so. He was very brave to do this.
The death of Rook (Dixieland jazz guy) in Killer Shrews. Watching the only black character scurrying up a tree and screaming in fear (though justified by the plot) is cringe-worthy. Joel probably wasn’t joking when he said that the scene was “offensive in so many ways”.
Even in a movie chock full of cringeworthy things, the little girl reveal at the end of Manos was unduly creepy.
“Still better than Toddlers and Tiaras!”
#1-Oh, yeah, Giant Spider Invasion-more specifically, the great Robert Easton’s entire role. The only excuse for this humiliation of one of Hollywood’s true ninjas is that, having been born in Milwaukee, Mr. Easton knew Bill Rebane from deer camp or something. The back brace over the red longjohns was perfect, and stomach-churning.
If his name isn’t familiar, imdb. An astonishing SIXTY-FIVE YEAR career as actor and dialog coach. He was Dusty Acres in “The Loved One” AND Laurence Olivier’s dialog coach in “Inchon”. And Kester in Giant Spider Invasion. Eww.
Two words: “Catching Trouble”
The Master taking a child bride at the end of Manos.
The sex scene involving Mitchell and Greta. “…watch the ribs…”
The way Mike and the Bots kept making it out like the kid in “Gorgo” looked like a chimp. That was cruel and unnecessary. He was just a kid for Pete Sake. And he was a cute kid, too!
I felt the same about the part of the Jet Jaguar Song where they sing Jet would like to crush the kid against a rock!
We are talking about small children here! Way out of the bounds of what’s funny. Violence against children? Never funny.
Always makes me cringe.
You can disagree, but that’s my story and I’m sticking with it!
Joe Don Baker and Linda Evans love making scene in “Mitchell” and then seeing baby oil on Joe Don’s night stand.
The entirety of Kitten With A Whip. Especially the “dialogue” coming out of Jodie and her “friends”.
Yup #11. Baby oil was the first thought I had, too.
Or Mitchell’s argument with the kid…
Eddie Deezen “fighting” in LaserBlast
Wild Wild World of Batwoman; Heathcliff. “Nuff said.
Four words: Eegah gets a shave.
In “The Atomic Brain,” the way Mrs. March ogles over the women (especially Bea) is just nasty. I am going to agree with the opinion given in the ACEG, and say this really is a movie where you feel like you need a good shower after watching it.
Gotta agree with ‘Catching Trouble’. Made me ashamed to be a Human being. Of course, watching the news these days does, too.
Eegah and Roxie in the cave and her dad says,”give him something else”
The two guys watching the teenagers make out in Attack of the the Eye Creatures..
Eegah’s tongue lapping up the shaving cream…
Jim Backus’s performance and what he wore in Angels Revenge…
The sweater dress that the drifter wore in Eye Creatures….
Mitchell and Linda Evans in bed…
Ed Wood’s over-formal, over-exposing dialogue: “What could be so important in YOUR young life, as to warrant my attention?” -Mom in The Violent Years
Most of Hobgoblins could qualify, but the phone sex scene is exceptionally painful. It’s not funny, it’s not remotely sexy, it’s not well done, and it drags on forever. Are we supposed to find someone with a voice like Fran Dresher after a pack of Camels alluring?
(I will say that the interviews with Tami Bakke make her sound like she knew it was trash, and she’s a good sport about it all.)
People are showing instances with Joe Don Baker as being cringeworthy. Every shot with JDB is cringeworthy, all of them. I contend that people cringe when JDB walks by.
-The “transvestites” backroom fight in “The Brain that wouldn’t Die”. Plus the whole sleazy way he goes about finding a replacement body.
-Torgos feeble attempts at foreplay.
-Tanta Borgnine’s bedtime stories from “Merlin’s M.S.of W.”
-Rowsdower’s Mullet in “The Final Sacrifice”
Melting man. That old couple doing everything, that guy getting fed a turkey leg, the guy cooking something (ouch-ka!), just…god…what is this we’re watching? :D
Teenage Strangler. Now, you just get in your room. And you stay there! He’s a dad just wanting to be killed by his own offspring. I…I didn’t steal no bike! … all that…
In “Soultaker” “Mom” ogles her daughter while she takes a shower. :sick:
Wild World of Batwoman also had the unwatchable “Ching Chong” scene. When the weekend thread does “Worst attempts at humor,” this one will be at the top.
BTW — I don’t think “Worst Attempts At Humor” has been done yet, right?
The scientists ogling the secretary in Fire Maidens. “I wonder if the beings on Jupiter’s satellite will look anything like her”.
(by the, Sampo, the phrase “peeper privates” has another, much more cringworthy, interpretation)
Oh my…Satan! (The extreme overuse of OMG by anyone and everyone is very cringe worthy, and I am taking a stand to stamp it out NOW!)
As for MST movie moments:
1. Grandma trolling and open mouth kissing in “Leech Woman”, leading to Jerry’s attempted murder of June, and then June’s actual murder of Jerry…a goose pimple raising clash of double crosses!
2. The whole captive junkie scene in “Hellcats”.
3. The slimy anti-erotic search for a replacement body in “The Brain That Wouldn’t Die”.
4. Yuri’s psychotic possessiveness of Natalie in “Werewolf”.
If anyone else gets these instances while I’ve been typing, my apologies.
The “Great” Vorelli seducing lovely Marianne. (Devil Doll)
Evil queen seducing Watney. (Outlaw of Gor)
I can’t watch the shaving scene in Eegah.
The outhouse scene from Boggy Creek II, and the fact that Charles B. Pierce apparently thought we needed a close-up of the whole thing, is definitely one of the darkest moments in cinematic history.
Also, Warrior of the Lost World is filled with cringe-worthy attempts at entertainment. After the talking bike’s failed attempts at comic relief, the bizarre leather-clad “dance” number, and the clash of movie genres when the various “gangs” have a free-for-all, were all pretty hard to stomach. Next time I think I will just skip ahead to the Mega-Weapon scene.
– Arch Hall Jr.’s face.
– The “Yipes Stripes” musical scene, from Teenage Strangler.
– Captain Santa Claus’s grandma daughter presenting like a mandrill and seducing Phil Collins, in Space Mutiny.
– The main character never buttoning his shirt, in Phantom Planet.
– Every greasy second of Mitchell.
– Eegah’s infamous shaving scene.
– Any shot of Charles B. Pierce in his upsetting shorts, in Boggy Creek.
– Is It Love? No, it’s an irritating young couple that should consider a suicide pact.
– Every scene of the obese characters, in Ring of Terror.
– Mr. B Natural’s interpretive dances, for each of the brass instruments.
Pretty much any interaction between Moore and Breiteis in Project Moon Base.
Two scenes where I must avert my eyes: The gut-shot fawn (Circus On Ice)is not beautiful or entertaining, just creepy. Also each time a Rodeo Daredevil gets thrown from a horse. Oh and let’s not forget “Get Your Tickets Here”!
Dr. Man-batch from Boggy Creek II. Please go up a pants size!!!!!
Close-ups of Lon Chaney’s eye-bags. (Indestructible Man)
Close-ups of Bella’s eye-bags. (Bride of the Monster)
And how could we forget the thermometer scene from Creeping Terror?
#2
Don’t forget Pat Buttram as a car salesman in Angels Revenge.
Then there’s Jack Palance’s walking through his payday in…Angels Revenge.
And the two smarmy guys on the beach in…Angels Revenge.
Of course there’s Peter Lawford’s soliliquoy on “keeping in control” in…Angels Revenge.
And there’s Arthur Godfrey’s cameo in…Angels Revenge.
And (oh never mind)…just check out Angels Revenge.
All 95 Min. of 1008 Final Justice!! Probably the single worst movie of the 1980’s!!!
Many of my most cringeworthy moments have been taken. I’ll say any time Chase sings that “The Lord Said Laugh” song in “The Giant Gila Monster.” Just stop. Please stop.
“Final Justice”, yes. But particularly the ‘exotic dancers’ wearing tiny triangles. Sexy-anorexie? Ugh.
I don’t believe I’ve had a cringeworthy moment, but I still haven’t seen most of the experiments. That said, the “girl gets watched by her mom showering” scene from Soultaker was kind of unnerving, which I guess it was supposed to be(?).
The sleazy doctor in THE BRAIN THAT WOULDN’T DIE luring the scarred model into trusting again and giving her false hope, just so he could kill her. I mean, I know he’s supposed to be evil but that just makes me want to put a fist through the wall. And on top of that, we NEVER find out what happens to her. The monster carts her off and she just disappears.
The creepy fanboy overtones of ROBOT HOLOCAUST, especially with the man-hating tribe of quasi-Amazons. Ditto OUTLAW OF GOR, though I imagine dozens of comics fans were thrilled beyond measure to see a woman actually wearing a cape, a bikini, and thigh-high hooker boots in real life. (“See! It CAN be done!”)
Rondo Hatton in THE BRUTE MAN is hard to watch when you consider how much pain he was probably in and how they were trying to use his deformity as a cheap special effect.
Oh, and the ‘recovered’ Heathcliff camping it up at the end of WILD WILD WORLD OF BATWOMAN. Someone needed to take that poor man aside and explain to him, at length and with much violence, that he really wasn’t very funny.
The scene from ‘The Sidehackers’ where J.C. slaps his girlfriend around. And what would have been the most cringe worthy moment from MST, when Rommel’s girlfriend is raped and murdered. They cut that scene out for MST because it was too traumatizing.
Wow, lots of good stuff here. I’d add Joe Estevez’ angry outburst in Werewolf. He stumbles through his lines so badly that I can’t help but shudder.
@21 – On the plus side you can just ditch that mom as she rustles you up some breakfast. “FREEDOM!”
The manic maid from Radar Secret Service, though it made for a fine Stinger.
When the mall parking lot supermodel in Angels Revenge strokes the van bazooka and exclaims, “I like this. This is really nice!” I’m okay with the sentiment, but does it have to be delivered in such a stultifying manner?
Boggy Creek II, in its entirety. Just, ick. It’s the only episode I’ve never watched again after the broadcast. Though now I’m going along with the weekly episode guide and watching all the episodes in order, so I guess I’ll have the next year or so to psych myself up for it.
Ditto for Catching Trouble. So horrible and disturbing. Joel and the Bots do a great job skewering it in the host segment, but man…lots of kids watched MST and I don’t understand why the Brains chose this short.
And I had forgotten about all the scenes of attempted humor at the expense of the fat characters in Ring of Terror–those make me cringe too, #32.
Every single thing about ‘The Blood Waters of Dr. Z’ causes DEEEEP HURTING!
# 37 pretty much sums it up. Every single character in Angels Revenge makes Dr Carlo Lombardi look like John Davidson. (Need to work on that comparison, but I think the basic idea comes through.)
But of all the squicky bits in A.R. I still think Arthur Godfrey playing HIMSELF as a squicky old perv (“I’m having a party in my room. All the big stars in Vegas will be there. Come up around 2 a.m.”) is the squickiest moment in MST history.
How about the mouse eating scene in “The Atomic Brain”? We don’t actually see it, but still…