This is probably going to reveal a lot about us…
I’ll leave a hunks list to the ladies, but here’s my a list of ten hotties I
find easy on the eyes:
Rosita Arenas — Flora from episode 102- ROBOT VS. THE AZTEK MUMMY: Very demure, but you can tell she’s a tigress.
Wanda McKay — Greta from epoisode 203- JUNGLE GODDESS: She can leave her hat on.
Sandra Giles — Jana Ryan of episode 307- DADDY-O: Want some? Do I ever!
Patsy Parsons — Cleolanta from episode 413- MANHUNT IN SPACE: There’s something about an evil villainess.
Beverly Garland — Vera from episode 503- SWAMP DIAMONDS: I do loves me some Beverly.
Rebecca Ferrati — Talena from 519- OUTLAW (OF GOR): Tawny and wild. Cabot, you lucky bastard.
Mary Beth Hughes — Terry Williams from 611- LAST OF THE WILD HORSES: I think she’s even hotter in this one than in “I Accuse My Parents” and she’s smokin’ in that.
Alix Talton — Marge Blaine from 804- THE DEADLY MANTIS: Sassy, sarcastic and steamy. I’ve got a mantis in mah pantis.
Brigid Conley Walsh — Thena from 913- QUEST OF THE DELTA KNIGHTS: She’s got a balcony you can do Shakespeare from.
Donna Leigh Drake — Kathy “oh yeah! Moonrocks!” Nolan from 1007- TRACK OF THE MOON BEAST: Gotta love that slightly stoned girl-next-door quality.
How about yours?
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What, no Mamie Van Doren?
Good list, but I find the girls from colour films a little easier on the eyes.
Suggest: The German beach-tart, archer-assassin from Agent for H.A.R.M.. Or there were a few beauties in the lamentable Double 007.
I had a big crush on Betty from Teenagers from Outer Space. Oh, and Tad Tadlock, the heroine of the Design for Dreaming short.
For the hunks, might I suggest Secret Agent Super Dragon. That man is smooth! ;)
Cave Dwellers’s Ator, definitely – he tops ANY hunk list. My goodness, the pecs and biceps and…excuse me, I must go take a cold shower…….
There, better now. Let’s see, for other hunks,
personally, I’d add:
*Godo from Time of the Apes
*Jon Mikl Thor from Zombie Nightmare
*Space Mutiny’s Dave Ryder
*John Phillip Law, specifically as Diabolik
*Ross Hagen in both Sidehackers & Hellcats (yeah, yeah, I know, but he’s just kind of hot)
I’d add an honorable mention for Bruno VeSota, just because he can play suave, evil, or vulnerable, which is attractive all on its own. The Warrior of the Lost World & Deathstalker are physically attractive but just too smarmy & self-satisfied to be truly appealing.
Oh, and Sampo, for another weekend topic list, how about the three (or five, or whatever) MST episodes people tend to watch most often, and when they watch. Thenks!
Carrot is referring to the delectable Barbara Bouchet, long a favorite of mine since she was a real treat for the eyes in the 1967 CASINO ROYALE and in an episode of STAR TREK the next year.
But I say you can’t beat the kitten with a whip.
No — wait — that didn’t come out right — I mean, you can’t beat the KITTEN WITH A WHIP. Ann-Margret at the height of her powers.
I also want to put in a vote for Allison Hayes in THE UNDEAD. Yow.
Valeria from episode 110 Robot Holocaust.
Me and my heart were doomed when I saw her! I love a pretty woman with an accent, even if it’s a badly acted one. Plus she dresses like a lingerie model in this film.
JC’s girlfriend in 202 Sidehackers.
I love her smoky voice, and that 60s look always gets me.
Cathy from 303 Pod People.
She seems really fun, and very loose :) Whoever dubbed her has a nice voice, too.
Allison Hayes as Grace Thomas, Marilyn Buferd (!) as Sharon and Sally Todd as Natalie in 320 The Unearthly
Most babe-errific MST episode ever!
Phyllis from 410 Hercules Against the Moon Men.
She is a stunner, and love the joke that Tom makes about the movie coming with air bags! Honorable mention to the Queen, also.
Vi in 414 Tormented.
Wow! She is poured into her costume in this. Even the bad special effects can’t take away from her beauty.
Charity in Secret Agent Super Dragon.
So what if she shops at clown mart! Again, the 60s look does it for me.
Betty in 618 High School Big Shot.
She’s bad news, but I can’t help myself.
Donna from 701 Night of ther Bloodbeast.
She has a dumb blonde quality that I love.
Jessica and Linda from 805 The Thing that couldn’t Die.
Jessica has that fresh faced ‘Donnie and Marie’ thing going for her. I know she can’t pull off being a temptress when she is under the control of the evil monster. Linda is really hot in this, kind of a cut rate Allison Hayes.
Natalie from 904 Werewolf.
Again, even a bad accent is kind of sexy!
Kathy Nolan from 1007 Track of the Moon Beast
Gotta second this nomination!
Man, this is a good one.
First off, Beverly Garland in Swamp Diamonds, The Gunslinger and It Conquered the world respectively, I’ve a deep adoration for that woman and nobody can tell me she’s too old for me. Secondly Arch Hall jr. in Eegah! (more like Arch ‘Hunk’ jr.!) talk about sex appeal! Then lastly Neil Connery from, what else, Operation Double 007, that goatee just does things to me that I dare not speak aloud…
Ann-Margret, Kitten With a Whip 615…end of discussion.
What, no Creepy Girl?
I’ll second Edwin B’s nomination of Betty from High School Big Shot.
And finally, Babs from Horrors of Spider Island.
The Zigra Woman who chases Kenny and Helen all over Sea World.
Who, I might add, can put me into a coma with her eyes any day.
Persis Khambatta, WARRIOR OF THE LOST WORLD. Rest in peace.
Unknown extra, THE STARFIGHTERS. Remember those jokey phone booth scenes? Remember the second one? At the end of the second one, one of the faceless Air Force officers has a gorgeous lady on his arm. Seriously, I think she’s really cute. I know how silly that sounds, but I keep looking at her when this scene plays.
Coleen Gray (the non-made-up version), THE LEECH WOMAN and PHANTOM PLANET. It’s a shame she was reduced to films like these.
Heidi Bjorn as Carrie, the pantsless typist, WEREWOLF. She should have been the lead, actually.
Vivian Schilling, SOULTAKER. I don’t think she looks like Tonya Harding at ALL. Sorry, guys. She’s very attractive.
How about Eva from 1013 Diabolik!, esp when she stops that truck in her bathing suit.
Emby Mellay from Touch of Satan is cute as a button.
It’s odd that it was her first and last film she was in. I thought she did a good job, although the writer(s) of that movie should have been tarred and feathered for giving her the ‘This is where the fish lives’ line.
Marge from “Deadly Mantis?” You’re kidding, right? I’ll lay money she’s a transvestite. Give me either of the women from “The Thing That Couldn’t Die.” No, wait. I can beat that. No doubt, it’s the one from “Diabolik.” But what about the chick from “Agent from HARM?” No, it’s the Maltese cop from “Final Justice.” And that’s my final answer.
A lot of mine have been said already. I’ll definitely add myself to the list of Beverly Garland, Allison Hayes Mamie van Doren, and Ann Margaret fans. Big fans of Allison’s work should check out “Sign of the Pagan” (1954) to see her in a sarong!
But, here’s I few I haven’t seen yet:
Linda, from 104, WOMEN OF THE PREHISTORIC PLANET: even though she’s the only woman in the movie who’s remotely prehistoric, she has an amazing primitive quality.
Marta, the Swedish girl from 106, THE CRAWLING HAND: “What does it mean I’m stacked?”
A-Lice. from 107, ROBOT MONSTER: When she’s being held hostage, she ties HERSELF up while Ro-Man is on the phone!
Both Lisa and Bonnie, from 108, THE SLIME PEOPLE: Bonnie manages to be innocent and sultry at the same time, while Lisa is both competent in a post-holocaust scenario and, well, stacked.
Mila, from 301, CAVE DWELLERS: As Crow said, “I’d shoot Don Regan for the love of Lisa Foster.”
The girl in 310, FUGITIVE ALIEN and 318, STAR FORCE, who is part of the crew of the Bacchus 3 (not the weird aryanized ex-girlfriend/assassin): Ken should give her some attention, she obviously likes him!
Kim Catrall, in #403, CITY LIMITS: Gotta be there for Crow!
Liz, from #406, ATTACK OF THE GIANT LEECHES: I mean, whoa!
Queen Omphale (Umphala?), from #408 – HERCULES UNCHAINED: Joel says, “The closer she gets, the weirder she looks,” but I don’t mind getting close at all.
The stripper who has a date with a carny in #812 – THE INCREDIBLY STRANGE CREATURES: She really doesn’t look like a stripper, but she does look hot!
Honorable mention goes to Barboura Morris, from both #315, TEENAGE CAVEMAN and #316, VIKING WOMEN…etc. She’s just a bit player in both of them, but Corman used her to much greater effect in “Sorority Girl” (1957) and especially “Bucket of Blood” (1959)
Diane Lee Hart “Terry” Giant Spider Invasion, a timeless fashion statement (bikini underpants and halter top)
Serene Hedin “Tanya Yazzie” Boggy Creek II, aka “Lucy Bra-less”
Leslie McCrea “Michelle” Girl in Gold Boots, “I want to be a dancer!”
I agree that Malaria from Robot Holocaust was hot. Did you know there’s a nude scene featuring her in the non-MST version of the movie? I think that backs up Servo’s assertion that she came from porn. The director did. (Maybe that explains the lack of attention paid to continuity).
The woman from the Selling Wizard. Whoa !
Forget the ice cream, I’ll be right back !!!!!
I’m glad someone finally said Queen Omphale #408 – HERCULES UNCHAINED. She’s strikingly beautiful. The kind of beauty that might be intimidating. Sort of ice-queenishy. I have to add that besides ‘Creepy Girl’ really any one of the booty-shaking chicks from CATALINA CAPER are hot. Also…
*Iris Peynado as Sandra Hayes – #911 DEVIL FISH
*Serene Hedin as Tanya Yazzie – #1006 BOGGY CREEK II
As far as dudes go it’s sort of hard to choose cause they’re all so friggen cheesy but if I had to choose…
*TONY TRAVIS as EDDIE CRANE – #415 THE BEATNIKS
“Leather coat” anyone?
*REX REASON as DR. CAL MEACHAM – MST3K THE MOVIE; THIS ISLAND EARTH
“Ruth, shrinky dink remember?”
*JAMES FRANCISCUS as CLAYTON STONE – #401 SPACE TRAVELERS
…actually he’s not bad at all. RIP.
Ahahhbleck! I’m gonna go uncreep myself now.
Gotta second Emby Mallay. She can touch my Satan anytime.
…
Sorry about that.
Linda from Women of the Prehistoric Planet – I’d like to populate the “third planet from the sun” with her! Woo!
Marta from The Crawling Hand – Stacked, indeed.
Sharon from Pod People – Sure, she dresses like a whiny, coffee throwing April O’Neil, but why not?
Liara from Phantom Planet – The good and the beautiful…and easy! If Frank doesn’t want her, I’ll take her!
Mila from Cave Dwellers – Hmm. I wonder if a hubcap is trickier to unhook than a bra? :wink:
Honorable mention – Andromeda from The Giant of Marathon; I know it’s not technically MST3K (it’s Film Crew), but she’s so perfect she warrants a mention.
Mamie Van Doren
Kim Catrall
Creepy Girl
Betty from Teenagers from Outer Space
to name a few
Valeria from Robot Holocaust is indeed hot.
Jan before she lost her body was hot.
Barbara Bouchet – Ava Vestok from Agent for H.A.R.M. This was the first MST3K episode I saw in its entirety and I thought she was hot. Even 11 years later she isn’t still too bad on the eyes.
I remember seeing the promo for the episode on the Sci-Fi Channel and one clip had her asking Adam Chance, “Are you coming, or do I swim alone?” Crow: “Yes and yes.”
Ben Browder as John Crichton from Farscape…woops sorry, wrong show!
I nominate the supporting cast of Wild Wild World of Batwoman. Now that flick had some tasty babe-age, excepting Batwoman and her upsetting business casual bat-cleavage.
Randy
I gotta admit, I rented the unMSTied Robot Holocaust to see Valaria topless. I was only a teenager at the time, okay? Actually, not that hot looking; I was disappointed.
Maybe she’s not specifically “hot” but I always thought Janet Munro from Crawling Eye was really cute.
Lieu Chin and Robin Greer were my favorites from Angels Revenge.
I’ll second Dawn Bender from Teenagers From Outer Space
I also thought Stacy Smith from Teenage Strangler was super cute.
Plus Bridgette Jones is not only quite attractive (especially as Nuveena) but also a writer for mst3k which doubles her hotness.
Critter from “Girl in Gold Boots”
Don Sullivan from Giant Gila, but especially on the Rebel Set!
Billy from Laserblast
Trash from Escape 2000
and i kinda have a thing for Tommy Kirk
I would also like to add to the Ann-Margret vote and raise you a Kathy Ireland.
Hah! This list is so incomplete…
Where is Estelle Winwood, fairest lady of them all!?!?!?
Sampo listed her already, and I have to agree.
Thena from Delta Knights (for the obvious reason).
And also the blonde hottie from Parts: The Clonus Horror.
Richard Crane (Rocky Jones)
Critter from Girl in Gold Boots
James Franciscus from Space Travelers (the pocket Charlton Heston)
Ben Murphy (always had a thing for him)
Gary Lockwood in The Magic Sword
John Reynolds (Torgo – I know, but I thought he looked good under the makeup)
Beau Bridges (always had a thing for him, too)
Clu Gulager (always had – well, you get the idea)
Peter Brown from Kitten with a Whip (ditto)
Gordon Scott from Danger!! Death Ray! (there’s something about an ex-Tarzan)
and honorable mention goes to:
Jeff from What to Do on a Date
Women are tough for me to judge, but I’m kind of shocked that Ann-Margret would be left off of anyone’s list of MSTed women.
What about all of the skating Fire Maidens :twisted: !!!! Honorable mentions, Torgo’s desire(Margaret) and Manos’ wives :oops: .
I forgot to mention Ev Kester (Leslie Parrish) from Giant Spider Invasion. (How was your day at THE WHORE!!!!)
I wonder how many people here will say, “Joel Hodgson!”? :wink:
You guys do know that Thena from 913- QUEST OF THE DELTA KNIGHTS is in a WE network show called Army Wives right? time has been very good to her :cool:
As for me, I’ll take any chick in Samson vs the vampire women. Specifically, Lorena Velázquez as Thorina (spanish version of her name),María Duval as Diana and the best … Ofelia Montesco as Tandra, the main henchwoman.
all the extra camp ladies were pretty cute too
What! No one mentions Cisse Cameron (mom)
in Space Mutiny? (Bridge Largemeat’s love interest). :grin:
And of course, Creepy Girl- although there is a question as to her ethnicity that puzzles some singers/philosophers.
But perhaps the best is the whole harem in
The Horrors of Spider Island.
J.R. @ 38
Well, duh! Of course Joel’s a hunk – we were only talking about the actors. Same goes for Mike, in spades.
ck @ 40
The Debbie Reynolds lady? Really? People are hot for her?
Put my vote in for the leading lady of CATALINA CAPER. :wink:
the military son from ‘Teenage Crime Wave’ wins my first place. I love that pure-hearted, WW2 era kind of fella. steadfast and kind; honorable and loyal. the kind of man that makes you feel protected and safe. [course, my father was that kind of a fella.]
John Philip Law was a crush of mine when first I saw him in ‘The Russians are Coming.’ his MST3K incarnations are not quite as attractive- except for the smokin’ hot Kalgan [kidding.] he was easy on the eyes in ‘Barbarella,’ too.
and yes, god help me, Big Stupid is also kind of hot. but he’s the kind of hot that you admire clandestinely through a window while he installs the gutters, etc., on your home in his company’s uniform.
and you DON’T let him IN the house to use the bathroom.
I’m glad you can’t see my face burning pink with shame as I admit that I find Deathstalker pretty hot. and NO, I wouldn’t touch him with a ten-foot pole with a baked potato on the end of it.
the Warrior of the Lost World guy is another shame-generating ‘I think he’s kind of hot’ guy. even if he can barely form a sentence! he’s a ‘hot landscaper’ kind of hunk, and you also don’t let him in the house. [I was not aware of Persis Khambatta’s untimely passing. she was a true beauty.]
and you know what? I’m gonna say it: John Reynolds is pretty handsome. all he needs is a good shower, shave, and a thorough de-goating, and he’s quite cute.
to be egalitarian, the Maltese cop gal from ‘Final Justice’ is simply gorgeous. and she made acting across from the ambulatory tub of suet Joe-Don Baker seem nearly effortless.
my brain [for different reasons than a heterosexual male’s] is always boggled anew at the sight of Mamie Van Doren’s god-given attributes. I’m glad I wasn’t a teenage girl in the 50s. I would have spent hours in the mirror wondering where it all went wrong.
and yes, from the first time I saw him as a Cosmonaut in Rocket Attack USA, I’ve had a thing for Michael J. Nelson. there: I said it.
Alison Hayes as, well, virtually anyone, especially as Livia in “The Undead.” “What arest thou supported with, Livia?” Also in the same movie, Pamela Duncan, in the prostitute role, is super hot.
Irene Tsu from women of the prehistoric planet
Claudia Barrett you could see why the gorilla/robot guy had a thing for her in robot monster
Dee Duffy too skinny but very attractive lady cop from the Hellcats
Eiko Yanami the very hot and (I guess) alien babe from Gamera vs. Zigra
Beverly Garland – she was in several of these MST films take your pick
Anne Margaret of course from kitten with a whip
Lori nelson the adorable little science girl From Revenge of the Creature
Helena Abella the hot detective that kept getting JDB out of jams in Final Justice
OH!OH!OH! I got it! The next big sensation the girls from Spider Island versus the women of Batwoman! With special guest referee, Beverly Garland!
I’ll take ten tickets!
Gee, in how many threads can I mention Allison Hayes this week?
Two, it would seem.
Also:
Lisa Foster (the old guy’s daughter) from Cave Dwellers. What do you, the viewer, think?
The dark haired double-crosser from Operation Double 007 (too lazy to try to figure out which character name she was)
And I’ll second Talena from Outlaw. She’s got that I-was-in-Playboy-in-the-80s vibe. And since I was sneaking peeks at my dad’s Playboys in the 80s, well, I’ll just leave it at that.
Joyce Meadows in THE GIRL IN LOVERS LANE. Winsome, cute, endearing. Her bad end at the hands of Jack Elam really sucks. Big stupid head screenwriter!
Wow. This has turned into a list that now includes Estelle Winwood and Bruno VeSota. You were right, Sampo — this thread says a LOT about us. :grin:
“OH!OH!OH! I got it! The next big sensation the girls from Spider Island versus the women of Batwoman! With special guest referee, Beverly Garland!”
They gotta wear those white toulle robes like in Manos, right?