Bit: REALLY FEMMIE MOVIES Episode: 516- Alien From L.A. Crow: Ohh, Golan-Globus. They produced 'Lonely People' with Jill Clayburgh and Barbra Hershy. Did you see that, Mike? Mike: Well, no Crow. I didn't see that, 'cuz, well, I'm a guy! Crow: Oh, well. Really. Well, I knew you couldn't see it because you were watching 'Beaches' for the hundredth time! Mike: Hey Crow, the video store called. They have that copy of 'Men Don't Leave' they've been saving for you! Crow: Say, Mike. The video store called and said your copy of 'The Lemon Sisters' is way overdue! Mike: Hey, Crow. How's your new deluxe collectors edition of 'For The Boys' holding up? Crow: Say, Mike. How's your exclusive limited lazer disk edition of 'Yentl'? Tom: Guys! Guys! Guys! Cut it out! Let's just say you're both into really femmie movies and leave it at that. Okay? Mike: You know that's a good point Tom. By the way, could you do me a favor and not leave your copy of 'Mystic Pizza: The Director's Cut' laying around? Crow: Yeh, Tom. And keep your platinum edition of 'The Four Seasons' in your own room! Hahaha! Tom: Oh, sure Crow. No Problem. As long as I don't have to trip over 'Places In The Heart' and the rest of your complete Sally Fields collection! Mike: That's a good one, Tom! Good one! Tom: I wouldn't talk, Mrs. Nelson! I saw you take 'Steel Magnolias' off of Crow's Sally Field shelf. Hahaha! Crow: Well, I know you own the autographed script of 'The Goodbye Girl' Tom: Whoah! Zing! Haha! Ha ha. (To Mike after several other comments:) I don't think you know what love is! Mike: Oh really? Well, I'd lecture you on love, little man, but I know you want to get back to your novellization of 'Late For Dinner'! Tom: Oh! Oww! Boy, that knocked me right out. I'm out! I fold, guys! It's too hard for me. Crow: Great, Nelson. Aren't you due at the Walker for that special screening of 'Six Weeks'? Hahaha! Tom: Whooo! Bingo! Good one! Mike: No, I went there and there was a little sign there that said you and your pals were there for the 'Cousins' seminar! Tom: Whoah! That one could leave a scar! He's crying, Mike! Mike: I got him! I got him! Tom: You got him, zinged him! Crow: Yeah, Mike. Well, you set your alarm for 3:00 am so you could watch 'Irreconcilable Differences'! Hahaha! Advantage, MacEnCROW! Haha! Mike: Okay! Alright! Alright! Yeh, well, when I got up to watch it, you were there crying over 'Don't Tell Her It's Me'! Hahaha! Crow: Well, you started a support group 'cuz you were so traumatized by 'Dying Young'! Mike: Oooh, that's Campbell Scott, right? Crow: I wouldn't know! Mike: Okay, okay. Well, your dream is to open a theater so you can have midnight showings of 'Stella'! Hahaha! Crow: Well, you want to start a Herb Ross film festival! Mike: (Servo leans over and whispers something in Mike's ear) Okay, yeh? Well you paid thousands of dollars for the lobby cards of 'Always'! Haha! Crow: Yeh? Well, you bought some of the costumes from 'Not Without My Daughter'! Tom: Ohhh! Standing eight count! Go to your corners! And...Resume! Mike: Alright. Uh, you called your aunt to go see 'Mermaids'! Crow: You rented a safe deposit box to keep your treasured copy of 'Savannah Smiles'! Mike: 'Savannah Smiles'? Cute little girl. Okay. Uh, well you started a fund drive for a monument for 'Ice Castles'! Crow: Yeah? Yeah? You want a piece of me?! You sleep with a copy of 'Madame Sousatzka' under your pillow every night, smart boy! Mike: 'Madame Sousatzka'? I challenge! Servo, let's get a ruling on that! Tom (considering): 'Madame Sousatzka'? 'Madame Sousatzka'? Uh, Shirley MaClaine. Piano teacher. Teaches young boy. Well, I'll allow it, but careful there, Crow. Crow: C'mon! C'mon! C'mon! Gimme your best shot! What da'ya got?! Mike: Wait! Wait! Wait! Who's turn is it? Tom: It's Crow's turn since you challenged and lost... Crow: Okay, it's my turn again? Uh...Mmmmmm... Tom: Five...Four...Three...Two... Crow: You throw parties where everyone has to dress like a character from 'Fried Green Tomatoes'! Tom: Whoah! Crow: Whoop! Whoop! I'm bad! Mike: You quote freely from 'Rich and Famous'! Tom: There ya go! Crow: (meekly) Draw? Mike: Okay, it's a draw! Tom: So, guys. How many times have you seen 'Forever Young'? (Mike and Bots exit theater...) .