Bit: The Reporters of Rocketship X-M
Episode: 201- Rocketship X-M
Transcribed by firstname.lastname@example.org
(Joel walks in between bots, who are
humming a marching tune. As one person speaks, the others
continue the march.)
Joel: We of the Satellite of Love take this time to
salute some of the unsung heros of today's film...
Crow: The reporters of Rocketship
Joel: They are
the unsung heros that cuddle in back rooms, nameless, like
so many cattle, ummm...They are...slightly out of focus, and
uhh...we hold forth that they should not be forgotten.
Tom: They are the
journalists, the plucky personnel of the press corps, whose
mighty pens and pencils dutifully record whatever drivel
they are fed. Proud and passionate, nonplussed by the
elegant beauty of the United STates space program.
Crow: And so, we
present to you the journalists of Rocketship X-M. Ahh, role
them slides, Cambot.
correspondent Donald Bunsen, science editor for the
Ellenmeyer Flash. His scathing seven-part series on
stopcocks almost won him the 1953 Pulitzer Prize.
Tom: The famous
twin reporting team of Dirk and Kirk Burger, who cover both
sides of a story--Dirk up front and Kirk always from behind.
Their style is like an Oreo cookie--hard-biting reporters on
the outside, a creamy story in between.
Crow: On the
left, Hugh Beaumont's brother Spike, hairstyle editor for
Today's Rugged Man. The boys in the City Room say Spike can
sniff out an ounce of Palmade from inside a locked closet.
Notice Spike has donned his flying-wing lapel suit in
preparation for today's plum assignment--the trend-setting
hair helmet of Lloyd Bridges.
over Spike's left shoulder is Foreign Affairs correspondent
for Digest Digest, Peter K. Wimple. Mild-mannered and meek
to a fault, Wimple's motto is: When will it be my turn now?
Tom: Ladie's Home
Foundation Garments is well-represented by cub reporter
Robert Bland. Here we see him gathering information for his
upcoming piece on zero-gravity girdles. Don't let that
flint-hard exterior fool you--he's wearing a Warner bra,
trimmed with delicate peek-a-boo lace.
Crow: Leering in
from the back is chief editor of White Male Perspective,
Wilhelm Studman, visibly upset with the intrusion of a mere
girl into a man's world. Studman keeps his distance because
Chanel #5 gives him hives. Heh, heh, heh. The boys in the
Press Corps have nicknamed him 'The Golem.'
Joel: And there's
so many more. There's Billy and Frank and Judy.
Fanny and Automatic Slim.
Crow: There's Roy
and Scoop and Cold Type.
Joel: Owlman, Mr.
Peepers, and the Leech.
Tom: And this
guy. He's a Woozle; his name is Peanut.
Joel: These are
the men and women of the Press Corps, who will do anything
for a story.
they're told to withhold information. (Chuckles)
All: We salute
the Press Corps of Rocketship X-M.