MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000
THE UNOFFICIAL EPISODE GUIDE
SEASON SIX: 1994-1995
601- GIRLS TOWN
First shown: 7/16/94
Opening: Preparing for Dr. F.'s big announcement
Intro: Dr. F. unveils the Umbilicus
Host segment 1: Tom "scats" until Mike and Crow have had enough
Host segment 2: Mike explains the "honor system"
Host segment 3: Designing the woman of the future
End: M&TB make good use of the Umbilicus
Stinger: "You tell that boy to go home right now, or I'll call the police!"
602- INVASION U.S.A.
with short: "A DATE WITH YOUR FAMILY"
First shown: 7/23/94
Opening: Mike tries to build a robot
Intro: Dr. F. or a wire mother?
Host segment 1: A date with M&TB
Host segment 2: Tom tricks Crow into a Lois Lane discussion
Host segment 3: A visit from "A. Bomb" on the Hexfield
End: Tom thinks it's all a dream, letter, Frank is on patrol!
Stinger: Couple stare as a paper boy cries out: "Extra! Paper! America invaded! Read all about it!"
603- THE DEAD TALK BACK
with short: "THE SELLING WIZARD"
First shown: 7/30/94
Opening: Gypsy's fire drill.
Intro: Dr. F. tries pin-point cigarette marketing
Host segment 1: Radio talk show: "The Dead Talk Back"
Host segment 2: M&TB are "The Dead"
Host segment 3: Dr. F.'s interrogation session, Frank confesses, and Crow continues his guitar solo
End: Crow is still playing, Tom is acting up, Gypsy starts another fire drill, Mike reads a letter, Dr.
F. practices his archery skills
Stinger: Woman screams after seeing dead body
604- ZOMBIE NIGHTMARE
First shown: 11/24/94
Opening: Crow and Tom are Secret Service agents protecting Mike
Intro: The Mads are into voodoo, so they send a voodoo kit to the SOL
Host segment 1: Crow is reading when Tom runs him down!
Host segment 2: Mike, Crow and Tom enjoy a hot tub
Host segment 3: Crow abandoned his "Batman" screenplay, but neglected to tell Tom and Mike
End: Letters for Adam West, Frank turns Dr. F. into a zombie!
Stinger: Voodoo priestess finishes incantation and zombie screams
Special note: This episode was held from TV while it made the rounds of many college campuses during the
fall of '94 as part of Comedy Central's "Fresh Cheese" tour. It was finally shown on Turkey Day '94.
605- COLOSSUS AND THE HEADHUNTERS
First shown: 8/20/94
Opening: Tom does Crow's taxes
Intro: Dr. F. invents Nummy Muffin Coocol Butter, the world's most adorable pet, and sends it to M&TB,
much to Frank's dismay
Host segment 1: Song: "Nummy Muffin Coocol Butter"
Host segment 2: Nummy's fur is everywhere
Host segment 3: Nummy is sick, Frank is sick, so Mike sends Nummy back to Deep 13
End: "What does it feel like to get you head chopped off?", letters, the Mads have been caught
by their own creation
Stinger: Guy gets shot by arrow
606- THE CREEPING TERROR
First shown: 9/17/94
Opening: Tom is a security guard
Intro: Laundry day in Deep 13, Dr. F. makes the bots pretentious poseurs
Host segment 1: Crow makes a flag for the SOL
Host segment 2: M&TB stick it to "Love American Style"
Host segment 3: Mike sets up his stereo system
End: Crow and Tom want Gypsy to swallow them, letters, Dr. F. "presses" Frank about the laundry
Stinger: "My God! What is it?"
607- BLOODLUST
with short: "UNCLE JIM'S DAIRY FARM"
First shown: 9/3/94
Opening: Tom is Crow's therapist
Intro: Dr. F. redecorates Deep 13 for his mother's visit, but she's more pleased to see Frank
Host segment 1: Crow's veg'able stand gets run over by Servo's car!
Host segment 2: Square dancing
Host segment 3: Crow ruins Mystery Murder Dinner Theater
End: The bots think Mike is hunting them, letters, Dr. F.'s mom and Frank go out on the town
Stinger: Guy gets an arrow in the stomach
608- CODE NAME: DIAMOND HEAD
with short: "A DAY AT THE FAIR"
First shown: 10/1/94
Opening: M&TB are living in their own filth
Intro: The Mads obsess over cleanliness, cleaning up the SOL
Host segment 1: The bots thinks Mike is too nice, then they see what it would be like if Mike wasn't nice
Host segment 2: Then they are shown what it would be like to live with a Crash Test Dummy
Host segment 3: And finally, they are shown what it would like to live with the Frugal Gourmet
End: Luau on the SOL, Tom hulas a letter, the Mads are still obsessing
Stinger: "Aaaahhh! Johnny! Down there!"
609- THE SKY DIVERS
with short: "WHY STUDY THE INDUSTRIAL ARTS?"
First shown: 8/27/94
Opening: Tom's planetarium show is disrupted
Intro: Swing choir competition
Host segment 1: Shop class isn't going well
Host segment 2: Crow puts himself in a "double jock lock"
Host segment 3: Tom bombs Crow
End: Crow and Tom struggle in their parachutes, letter, Frank dodges ball
Stinger: "I don't know. I feel real free up there in the high blue sky."
610- THE VIOLENT YEARS
with short: "YOUNG MAN'S FANCY"
First shown: 10/8/94
Opening: Servo's new head!
Intro: The Mads unveil their theme music, "Living in Deep 13", and demand themes from M&TB.
Tom is ready!
Host segment 1: A radio station called Frank?
Host segment 2: Tom reenacts a tearful scene from "A Star is Born"
Host segment 3: A rehearsal for Crow's one man show about Keanu Reeves starring Mike!
End: Mike and Crow reenact the gas station hold-up scene from the movie, letter, turn your crank to Frank!
Stinger: "So what?"
611- LAST OF THE WILD HORSES
First shown: 10/15/94
Opening: Mike programs Crow and Tom with regional speech patterns
Intro: Dr. F. sends a matter transference device to the SOL during an ion storm. It's "Mirror-Mirror"
time!
Host segment 1: The Mirror-Mads sing "Joey the Lemur." In our universe, Crow and Mike struggle
with Mirror-Servo
Host segment 2: Mike and Crow plot strategy, while Mirror-Gypsy and Mirror-Servo do likewise
Host segment 3: Mike and Crow consult The Alternate Universe Manual. In the mirror universe, Mirror-Crow
attacks Mirror-Mike while Tom and Gypsy plot strategy
End: M&TB figure out what happened, the Mirror-Mads stop by while a letter is read, the Mads are enjoying
their new agony booth
Stinger: Wheelchair Dad laughs
612- THE STARFIGHTERS
First shown: 10/29/94
Opening: Crow tries to log onto the information super-highway
Intro: Cranial ports; Cowboy Mike's bold barbecue sauce
Host segment 1: While he and Tom reenact the refueling scene, Crow misses a call
Host segment 2: The bots "debrief" Mike
Host segment 3: The United Servo Academy Men's Chorus performs
End: Crow finally logs onto the information super-highway, letter, the Mads are sharing their thoughts
Stinger: Lady elbows hubby
613- THE SINISTER URGE
with short: "KEEPING CLEAN AND NEAT"
First shown: 11/5/94
Opening: Gypsy gets a shower
Intro: Dr. F. begins to worry about the missing Frank
Host segment 1: Frank gives the SOL a taste of what he's planning
Host segment 2: Checking Frank's background for clues
Host segment 3: All looks bleak until Mike remembers Frank's weakness
End: Dr. F. stops Frank's plan, letter, Deep Fried Frank!
Stinger: "Dirk? No that can't be Dirk...uh, uh...no...that's not Dirk...no."
614- SAN FRANCISCO INTERNATIONAL
First shown: 11/19/94
Opening: A political debate on politics
Intro: The Mads are construction workers, M&TB do the old board routine
Host segment 1: It's Urkel! Hahahahaha!
Host segment 2: It's still Urkel! Hahahahaha!
Host segment 3: More Urkel hilarity until Torgo has his say
End: Comments on the movie, letters, Dr. F.'s ears
Stinger: "My job, my way."
615- KITTEN WITH A WHIP
First shown: 11/23/94
Opening: Preparing Crow for a secret mission
Intro: Crow's mission to Deep 13 ends in failure
Host segment 1: Mike gives Crow and Tom bionic noises
Host segment 2: A kitten with a whip visits on the Hexfield
Host segment 3: Mike hazes himself
End: Mexican festival with a Dr. F. piñata, letter, Dr. F. has a Frank piñata
Stinger: "I'll be a celebrity! And so will you!"
616- RACKET GIRLS
with short: "ARE YOU READY FOR MARRIAGE"
First shown: 11/26/94
Opening: Lisa Loeb visits on the Hexfield...briefly
Intro: Security problems in Deep 13
Host segment 1: Crow wants to marry Tom, so they take a Cosmo quiz
Host segment 2: Crow's bachelor party
Host segment 3: The wedding ends in chaos
End: Too much wrestling, letters, Lisa Loeb gets into Deep 13
Stinger: SNAP! "It's gone!" "Where'd it go?"
617- THE SWORD AND THE DRAGON
First shown: 12/3/94
Opening: Playing D&D
Intro: For the Mads' new neighbors from Deep 12, M&TB present topical comedy show: "Supercalifragilisticexpeali-wacky!"
Host segment 1: "A joke by Ingmar Bergman"
Host segment 2: M&TB reenact the table cloth making scene
Host segment 3: Ilya Murametz visits on the Hexfield
End: Gypsy's review of the musical, The Mads are full of themselves!
Stinger: The wind demon takes a dive
618- HIGH SCHOOL BIG SHOT
with short: "OUT OF THIS WORLD"
First shown: 12/10/94
Opening: Mike has a headache
Intro: Frank clones a dinosaur, Crow mixes a potion that makes Tom Servo huge!
Host segment 1: "Specialty breads"
Host segment 2: Crow and Tom don't know what is wrong
Host segment 3: Crow and Tom fail to break into Gypsy's diary
End: Mike reads a letter while the bots reenact the end of the movie, Dr. F. gives the dino something to
chew on!
Stinger: "A million bucks!"
619- RED ZONE CUBA
with short: "SPEECH: PLATFORM POSTURE AND APPEARANCE"
First shown: 12/17/94
Opening: Tonight's lotto numbers
Intro: Frank owes the mob $50 large, but they stomp Dr. F. instead; M&TB hit the casino
Host segment 1: Frank exhorts the nearly-dead Dr. F.
Host segment 2: Mike is Carol Channing; Dr. F. gets "hope you die" wishes
Host segment 3: Dr. F. lives, dies, and lives again, but the mob says otherwise
End: M&TB sing a happy, upbeat song, Dr. F. is feeling better
Stinger: Blind lady playing piano
620- DANGER! DEATH RAY
First shown: 1/7/95
Opening: Crow has contact lenses
Intro: Frank is a talent agent
Host segment 1: Servo builds a death ray for peaceful purposes, but can't resist using it on Crow
Host segment 2: "This is your life, Mike Nelson"
Host segment 3: Crow's designs for sunglasses seem a bit woman-ey
End: Cambot gets emotional, Frank has a glamour shot
Stinger: Dropping watch into swimming pool
621- THE BEAST OF YUCCA FLATS
with shorts: "MONEY TALKS!" & "PROGRESS ISLAND, U.S.A."
First shown: 1/21/95
Opening: Wallpapering the SOL
Intro: "Proposition Deep 13," vs. candidate Mike Nelson
Host segment 1: A visit from some party animals
Host segment 2: So, is it 11:30?
Host segment 3: Crow offers a plea for film anti-preservation, but Mike disapproves
End: Mike's victory speech, letters, Dr. F.'s concession speech
Stinger: The beast is pissed
622- ANGELS' REVENGE
First shown: 3/11/95
Opening: Crow thinks that he has amnesia
Intro: Desperate for ratings, Dr. F. turns M&TB into the cast of "Renegade"
Host segment 1: Crow latest screenplay is a "black-sploitation" film
Host segment 2: Mike does his Fonz, Crow and Tom disapprove
Host segment 3: Aaron Spelling's house passes by
End: The shame-o-meter, the Mads are Bobby Riggs and Billy-Jean King
Stinger: "Shine your love!"
623- THE AMAZING TRANSPARENT MAN
with short: "THE DAYS OF OUR YEARS"
First shown: 3/18/95
Opening: Crow is Tom's science project
Intro: At Auntie McFrank's bed and breakfast, Dr. F. demands that M&TB provide some "local color"--and
soon regrets it
Host segment 1: Crow learns about "gentle pressure," but doesn't practice it
Host segment 2: Frank misses out on "Squanto"
Host segment 3: Mike gets caught playing Rick Wakeman
End: Answering the film's question, transparent letter, tea time in Deep 13
Stinger: Petting the invisible guinea pig
624- SAMSON VS. THE VAMPIRE WOMEN
First shown: 3/25/95
Opening: A moment of silence
Intro: Almost everyone enjoys some Chinese food
Host segment 1: While playing Stratego, Crow gets a message
Host segment 2: Torgo the White arrives to take Frank to Second Banana Heaven
Host segment 3: Song: "Who will I kill?"
End: The 'Bots read their letters to Frank, who visits Dr. F. and pushes the button one last time
Stinger: "Chief, I saw two corpses in the garden."
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